How to change life for the better exact plan. Mastering public speaking skills

It often happens that a person who seeks to change his life focuses only on certain areas life and neglect others.
For example, if he is interested in finding himself and self-realization, he may not think about physical development. If he is interested in his figure or personal life, he may not think about a career or finances, etc.

But, as practice shows, this approach is a mistake.
In order to achieve results in any of the areas of life, one must not forget both the entire personal strategy and those specific areas that seem unimportant to you, but actually play a significant role. This is the only way to solve a specific issue and change life in general.

If you don't know where to start, start by improving your appearance.

Here is what a famous plastic surgeon and psychiatrist says:

When you change a person's face, you almost always change their future as well. By changing his idea of ​​his appearance, in almost all cases you change the person himself - his individual qualities, behavior - and sometimes even talents and abilities❞

This statement applies not only to the cardinal alteration of oneself through plastic surgery, but also to all positive changes in appearance. Having lost five kilograms or made a new hairstyle, you begin to perceive yourself differently, you feel more confident and attractive.

Analyze your habits

The next step is habits. Our habits are at the core of our character. Remember the famous aphorism of Aristotle, which is familiar to many from childhood:

❝If you sow a thought, you will reap an action; you sow an act, you reap a habit; sow a habit, reap a character; you sow a character, you reap a destiny.

Habits are patterns of our behavior that govern our lives. Are we really going to let them decide everything for us, following their lead?

Method: Carefully analyze each of your habits and its impact on your life. Eliminate those that hinder your success, replace them with new, healthy habits.

For those who really decided to work on themselves, I offer the Success Diary - a classic diary with applications for achieving success and working on yourself

4. Conditioned reflexes
No wonder the scientist Pavlov tormented dogs: conditioned reflexes are the basis of the foundations. With this key, you can form any habit you need.

Method: Repetitive actions with reinforcement develop new skills and habits. When new skill will be fixed, it will go into the subconscious and you will do everything automatically, unloading your brain for new achievements.
Reward yourself for success or take something away if you backtrack on your plan to change yourself. Let your new quality be necessary and desirable for you.

5. Eradication
What cannot be converted into a plus, just eradicate.

How to identify your negative qualities and how to see yourself from the outside, read the article. You can also download a table of negative human properties.

6. Double life
The technique is suitable for developing new character traits and more significant changes in oneself.

Method: Imagine yourself the way you want to be. Rehearse new role mentally over and over. To be more convincing, buy things that will help you get into character and emphasize your new qualities. Wear them only for your second life.
Your environment is unlikely to immediately accept you new, so communicate with those who do not know you! Rehearse your new qualities on them. How much will they believe in your image? And if something does not work out, you can always change the place and environment, and try again.

7. Use your imagination

In the course of the experiment, it was proved that if a person spends a certain period of time daily in front of a target, imagining himself throwing darts at it, then his results will improve to the same extent as if he really threw darts at the target every day.

Mental images allow us to "practice" new relationships and character traits that would otherwise be unattainable. Our nervous system unable to distinguish reality from what our imagination vividly painted. When we imagine ourselves doing something in some particular way, it is almost the same as actually doing it. Mental practice helps to achieve perfection.

Method: Every day in the morning and before going to bed, mentally imagine yourself the way you aspire to be. How you speak, how you move, what you wear, how you react to situations. Do it over and over. This imaginary picture will have a strong influence on your behavior. And remember, how you see yourself from the inside largely determines how others see you and others.

8. Shock
If you want to change yourself but still don't find enough motivation to start, let failure be your motivation.

Method: Associate with people who will openly despise you. Use other people's ridicule to your advantage. Prove to them that you can be better, prettier, smarter. This method has never failed.

9. Alien
Often with our loved ones, we behave like a pig. Hamim, we neglect them and do not respect them at all. Whereas with strangers we are completely different, especially with superiors. If you want to change your behavior, try this method.

Method: Imagine in the place of the father or mother a complete stranger to you, whom you want to impress. Treat them like a boss on whom your salary depends. Try to look at them from a distance, as if seeing them for the first time.

10. Tune in

Method: change the environment and communicate with the people you want to be like. Adopt their habits, their way of thinking. In every success book, communication with successful people, how does it work?

In the course of communication with another person, we tune in to his wave - to the mentality of the interlocutor and his worldview. Without this, communication is impossible. As a result of this adjustment, we temporarily change our ideas, stereotypes of thinking and behavior, to someone else's. And the more often this happens, that is, the more often we communicate, the more we adopt until someone else's picture of the world becomes ours.

11. Cold shower of the "future"
When you really grow up and think about the future, you suddenly realize that it would be time to get rid of many habits and character traits. The thought of what will soon have to be built new life with family - sobering. I no longer want to overspend, be optional, drink all night with friends.

Method: Think about the future and the life you want to have, and figure out for yourself how you need to change and what habits to eradicate.

But I want to warn you don't take on too much. Weakly amenable to change innate temperament.

An introvert (a person deep in himself), of course, can change and become his opposite - an extrovert. But he will soon get tired of this “role” and will be unhappy, being in plain sight, secretly wanting to be alone with himself and his thoughts. There will be a feeling of emptiness. It arises from the loss of energy, because introverts draw it from within themselves, and only spend it in communication with others. It becomes clear that to lead such a long life is difficult and exhausting.

Be sure to record your wins and losses in a Success Diary, which is a must-have if you are aiming for serious results.

Or maybe you don't need to change?

Find your circle where you will be accepted as you are and there you will be happy. Everyone has their own value system and it is quite possible that your dream is to change and become more popular, successful, etc. will not bring the desired joy.

Or sublimate your energy into creativity. How can this incomprehensible Freudian term help us? The fact that we can redirect ourselves, life, others into creativity, using the protective mechanisms of our psyche.

Leonardo da Vinci, the great painter, scientist and engineer did just that. Whatever he took on, he brought it to perfection. However, it is reliably known that he had no interest in sex. Similar sublimation can be seen in many creative people. They simply cannot create when they are happy.

Sublimate (redirect) your energy and desires into creativity, to new hobbies. Are you a bespectacled man with a bad figure and therefore experience difficulties with the opposite sex? There are two ways out here - to change by working on yourself: exhausting workouts plus pickup courses. Or - find the passion of your life and create. We miss your talent so much!

As you change yourself, don't forget to change the space around you. Tidy up a cluttered apartment and change your wardrobe, how to do it easily and quickly - in Erin Doland's motivating book "Simplify Your Life" ().

How to change your life for the better - where to start (psychology)? The most important answer to this question is obvious and suggests itself: you need to make the final decision, as they say, “craze” and no longer put it off. In this article - effective, and most importantly, simple technique, with which in just 4 weeks you will change your life for the better in every area.

I really hope you stop and finally move from reading many tips to action! The technique is very simple, itemized and has only 4 blocks (a week for each block).

Small but useful advice: get yourself a personal diary. I assure you, as soon as you begin to make efforts on yourself and “drag” yourself into a new life, many thoughts will appear that are interesting to write down.

I promise, if you overcome your laziness and follow all the steps, you won't recognize yourself in a month!

Exercise 1. Start getting up at 6 am!

Get up at 6 am and you will have time for yourself while your family is sleeping. Admit it, because there is never enough time for yourself. And you can’t finish reading a book, put things in order in an old closet, start learning English, start doing exercises, etc.

Morning is the perfect time to do something useful and new for yourself. When you are lazy, do not want to get up - this does not mean fatigue at all, but says that you do not want to live a little more than “normal”. You don't want to get up because you don't like your job. Remember that day when you had to get up at 6 in the morning in order to go to the airport on vacation in Thailand. On such a day, everyone jumps up with joy!

Conclusion: in order to easily get up at 6 in the morning, you need to build a life for yourself into which you want to break into your life every morning and learn a lot of new things with interest, including about yourself!

Task #2. Start Light Eating!

It takes a tremendous amount of energy to do the work of changing your life for the better. And your body is already having a hard time, because it supports your simple “normal” life, despite alcohol, cigarettes, fatty foods, sweets, etc. This list goes on, everyone has their own.

You can choose the type of food that seems right to you, or at least give up something that is not healthy or even harmful. For example, I refused and not for a month, but forever from sweet soda, chips, cookies, convenience foods, ketchup, moyonnaise, fast foods and similar products that have nothing to do with healthy eating. I also don't eat meat on Wednesdays and Fridays. This unloads the body, gives it a little rest, and even has a spiritual meaning.

So, harmful - exclude, and portions - reduce. Don't forget to drink water throughout the day. And don't eat before bed. Feed your body healthy, light, delicious food. And he will thank you with the energy that you need for decisive action!

Task #3. Start playing sports!

Please don't whine! Sport is the most important thing for a strong spirit and determination. To awaken your determination, you need to stir up a tired body. You can choose any options: dancing, fitness, running, swimming. And if sport is not your thing, you can go the simplest way - in the morning, instead of exercising, do the Plank exercise for 2 minutes and walk 4-5 km a day on foot (for example, go out a couple of stops before work and walk and don’t use the elevator anymore - go up the stairs.

Week #2. Clear space, environment and affairs

Exercise 1. Clear your space!

This is a difficult task - you need to throw away everything that has not been used for more than a year! If you stuff everything on the mezzanine, the task will not count. We have heard many times from psychologists and coaches that each useless thing in our house takes away not only the place, but also our energy. That you need to make room for new and really useful things.

Finally put this knowledge into practice. Leave only the necessary things and those that inspire and delight. Do It general cleaning, clean the dust in the farthest corners.

Task #2. Clear your thoughts of deeds and obligations!

For many years, many of us have promised ourselves to learn English, quit smoking, or go to the countryside to visit our aunt, whom we last saw as a child. There are many plans that we carry over from year to year!

So, psychologists say that each such point of the plan “pulls” energy from us, because deep in the subconscious we “think” about it. What to do with it? You can solve this problem right now. Remember all the promises you made to others or to yourself. And decide what to do with it.

There are 3 options: 1) start to perform, 2) refuse for good and delete from the list of plans, 3) reschedule for a clearly designated time or indicate a clear condition for implementation. For example, it is not critical for me to start learning English NOW. I will start teaching when the motivation appears, for example, I plan to travel 2 times a year to different countries.

Task #3. Clean up your environment!

This is a common problem. It is inconvenient for us to end relationships with people, although we know for sure that we do not need these relationships, because they plunge us into depression, weigh us down, and pull us back. I assure you that this is false modesty. Right now, you need to make a decision not to communicate anymore with those who have nothing to learn from, who are not satisfied with everything, criticize everyone, dictate their opinion to everyone.

Learn to say no to these people. Pay any price for your freedom, even if you hear accusations against you that you are "ungrateful", "ill-mannered" and so on.

Important! Parents are an exception. With parents, on the contrary, relations must be established, no matter how difficult it may be.

Week #3. Start writing down dreams, goals and plans

Exercise 1. Start writing and making plans!

A personal diary will come in handy. In it, you can write not only plans, but also your thoughts. You already have a task plan from the previous weeks. If you don’t want to do some of them, either do it right away, or cross it out, or transfer it to a clear certain time(as with learning English). In all these options, you will get a surge of strength and a great desire to live and create.

Just do not fool yourself again, but write such goals and objectives in the plan that you really want to accomplish. So that your hands itch with anticipation and you want to start doing it as soon as possible and with great enthusiasm.

Motivation can be a phrase that must be repeated every morning. Start writing really Interesting book of your life - a chapter a day!

Task #2. Write a list of "incredible plans"!

Exactly this interesting task. Imagine that you have everything (money, time) to make your most incredible dream come true. For example, to climb Everest or something like that. Make a list of such incredible plans. I assure you that many of them will come true in a few years and will seem very modest to you.

Task #3. Plan daily!

Get into the habit of writing a to-do list in the evening next day. You can write in your paper Personal Diary or electronic, it doesn't matter (here are the best of mobile applications to maintain Personal Diary - Penzu, Diaro). Let it be a very short plan, the main thing is that it be. What for? you ask. Even if you never remember the previous day's plan again, your productivity for that day will increase exponentially.

Important! Do not forget about the global plan, check if you deviate from the main course?

Week #4 Expand your boundaries

Exercise 1. Start living differently!

Even in small things, start living and doing everything differently. Go to work the other way, and you will meet new people, you will see new beautiful streets. Go to another cafe. Finally decide to go to an expensive store. Try a new hobby like skiing, Latin American dances. It's educational and fun. Don't be afraid to do things you don't have experience with.

It is important to gain self-confidence and cultivate the habit of not being afraid to go off the beaten path, to easily start doing something new!

Task #2. Get out of your comfort zone!

Did you really manage to complete all the previous tasks? If yes, then you have already managed to leave your comfort zone! But you need not to stop, but to go further and look boldly into the eyes of your fears and fight them.

Only radical methods will help. Are you afraid of heights? We need to jump with a parachute. If you are afraid of the boss, get ready and come to him with a new idea. Are you afraid of the company strangers- go to a party, and do not argue with a girlfriend about how to overcome this fear. Are you afraid to change jobs or start your own business? Without delay, write a resume and find new job. Don't be afraid! Now the time has come when it is easy to find a new job or learn a new one.

It is also important to have rest alone with yourself and allow yourself not to think about anything, but only to contemplate the beauty of the world around you. Or stop after all the fuss and honestly ask yourself if everything is fine, how to live on?

Other helpful articles: .

Summary

You are already at the beginning of the journey. If you ask “How to change your life for the better - where to start?”, then some part of your soul longs for a new life. So take advantage of the moment, please, do not delay, but conduct this experiment. Just 1 month of doing simple tasks and you will not recognize your life. Let it be just a path at the beginning, but then it will turn into a real interesting road with exciting adventures.

In conclusion, watch this wonderful and useful video from the famous psychologist, coach Pavel Kochkin, "How to find yourself (7 stages)". Answer his questions and understand where you are stuck and how to move on.

I wish you all patience, inspiration and a lot of strength to make your dreams come true!

Let's talk about a very important and relevant topic: how to start changing, how to change yourself and your life for the better? Not so long ago, in an article about I wrote that the life of any modern man does not stand still, changes in it are inevitable in any case, and in order to better adapt your life to such conditions, you must not wait for changes to come from outside, but initiate them yourself: change yourself and your life for the better.

When changes in life come from outside, without the will of the person himself, most often they lead to some kind of deterioration, have a negative effect. Change yourself and your life better side You can only initiate change yourself.

However, it is very difficult psychologically for most people to start changing. After all, for this it is necessary to get out of the comfort zone, the creation of which has already been spent a certain amount of time, effort, and possibly money. How to overcome this psychological discomfort, how to change your life for the better - more on that later.

So, first of all, to start life changes, I recommend dividing them into 2 large areas:

1. Change life circumstances.
2. Change yourself.

Let me explain. By circumstances I mean all the conditions in which a person lives. Moreover, these conditions can either depend on a person or not, and it is necessary to strive to change those circumstances that do not satisfy a person and depend on him, accepting the rest as they are, even if they also do not satisfy.

For example, personal life, work, profession, sources of income, hobbies, place of residence - these are all those life circumstances that a person can influence, wanting to change his life for the better. But the level of prices, taxation rates, laws of the country - these are already circumstances that a person cannot change, and it is pointless to waste your energy on this. Although, by and large, a person can move to another country, where all this will suit him, but this is already too much global changes, I think that those who are just thinking about how to start changing are definitely not ready for this.

And if we talk about how to change yourself, then by this I mean changing your own attitude to ongoing processes and phenomena, getting what you need for life.

To start changing yourself and your life, highlight separately the life circumstances and personal qualities that do not suit you and that you would like to change.

A serious mistake many people make when thinking about how to change their lives is that they incorrectly reckon any personal factors or life circumstances to a number beyond their control, and at the same time they try to change those that really do not depend on them. That is, they evaluate themselves and their capabilities biased. Well, for example, instead of changing something in themselves, they try to change the people around them: their soul mate, their friends, colleagues, the society in which they are. In the global plans of such people - to change their country for the better or save the world from a universal catastrophe.

Good goals? It would seem, yes. The only question is how to go to achieve them. If a person tries to change everything around without changing himself, this undertaking is obviously doomed to failure. Most likely, such a person will only set everyone around him against himself, while he himself will not achieve anything, and the world will not change. As a result, a lot of wasted time, energy, and deep disappointment await him. It would be much more correct to change what is within the power of him specifically: that is, himself and his life circumstances, thereby making his modest contribution to changing the country and the world. After all, the country and the world are made up of people, and if each of them starts to change their lives for the better, both the country and the world will change.

Another common problem is this: many people don't even think about how to change themselves because they think it's impossible. Their life principle: "I am the way I am, and I will not become another." Such inferences are based on the erroneous belief that a person's character cannot be changed. In fact, this is absolutely not the case: you can change the character if you work on it. And in some cases, it can even change itself under the influence of some changed life circumstances.

Thinking about how to start changing, you should understand that if you wish, you can change even those qualities of yourself that, at first glance, seem unchanged. Well, for example:

– Appearance and physical data. There are many examples when the "ugly duckling" turned into a "beautiful swan". You need to work on yourself, on your body, go in for sports, and in extreme cases, now there is even an opportunity to use the services of plastic surgeons. If it really helps to change your life for the better, then why not?

– Mind and intellect. If there is a desire and aspiration, one can develop one's mental faculties very substantially. Now there are plenty of opportunities for this: you need to read a lot of useful literature, get useful information from the Internet, audio books, video lessons and other sources. There are examples in history when people who did poorly in school later became geniuses and made world-class discoveries.

– Beliefs. Many people are prevented from changing their lives for the better by the so-called. . People are convinced that "such is fate, life is unfair, and nothing more can be achieved." This is the wrong position to begin with. Once you change your psychology of poverty to , you yourself will notice how your life will begin to change for the better.

– Habits. Changing your habits will also not be a problem, and at the same time such changes will help develop the volitional qualities of a person, which is also very important for changing life for the better. It is necessary to try to get rid of bad habits and develop good ones. It will be a good helper in this.

– Financial position. Moreover, this is an indicator that can and should be changed for the better. For this, there are many useful tools, most of which are already described on the site financial genius. If you are thinking about how to change yourself and your life for the better, you definitely should follow one of the directions.

However, the greatest degree of importance in order to begin to change for the better will not be a change in the above-mentioned qualities, but a change in character, namely, will, volitional qualities. Because everything else will follow from that.

In order to change yourself and your life for the better, it is necessary, first of all, to strengthen your strong-willed qualities and change your character.

As I already wrote, this is not easy to do if we are talking about an adult with an already formed character, but it is possible. How? First of all, you need to objectively identify those weaknesses in your character that you would like to change. Then try to do things that are characteristic of the character you are striving for.

For example, you are too timid by nature. So, try to take the initiative as often as possible, take on the role of a leader in the company, do those things that you didn’t do before because of your timidity.

Or are you afraid of a lot. In this case, regularly perform some bold, risky deeds, take advantage of some risky rides, start exercising risk types sports. At first, it will be very difficult for you to overcome your fear, but each time it will become easier, because your character will begin to change for the better.

From individual actions habits are developed, from habits - character, and from character - further changes for the better. Therefore, if you do not know how to change yourself, start with individual actions.

In particular, the following actions will help you start to change for the better:

• planning something and following your plan exactly;
• giving up something that seems wrong to you if it is difficult to give up;
• quick and firm decision-making, without any hesitation and long miscalculations;
• actions that contradict the expectations of your relatives, relatives, friends, colleagues, acquaintances;
• rejection of bad habits;
• rejection of unnecessary things that do not bring any benefit (“hanging out” in social networks, computer games, watching TV, etc.);
• instant execution important work, which you want to postpone;
• postponing non-essential work that you want to do immediately;
• restraining yourself from words that you really want to say (for example, the desire to argue, prove to another person that he is wrong, show off intelligence, etc.);
• the first step towards achieving a meaningful goal ().

By regularly doing such things, you will begin to change your character, and therefore yourself, your life for the better.

Speaking about how to start changing, one cannot fail to mention the most important thing with which it all begins: setting goals and objectives. That is, you must immediately determine the goals for which all your changes will occur. It will help you to correctly formulate the goal, according to which your goal should be specific, measurable, achievable, supported by resources and indicated in time.

Moreover, it is very important to be able to choose the shortest, optimal path to achieve the goal. Practice shows that many people set the right goals for themselves, but at the same time they do not know how to search for the right way to achieve them.

For example, take the most common goal that most young people set for themselves before entering adulthood: to become rich and financially independent. Right target? Quite, if only to specify it as much as possible (I analyzed how to do it specifically for this purpose using an example in the article)

But how to achieve this goal? Most people think something like this: first you need to study at the institute, get a promising specialty, then get a job in good company, gain experience, climb the career ladder, as a result, become the head of the company and earn good money.

Can a person become rich and financially independent, change his life for the better, if he follows this path? I am sure that in 90% of cases - no. Look around: everyone once imagined changing their lives for the better in this way, but which of them was really able to achieve something in this way? Probably a few out of thousands. And this is quite logical and natural, now I will explain why.

Firstly, wealth and financial independence are not measured by the amount of earnings, but depend simultaneously on the income and expenditure side of the personal budget. There is not a word about planning expenses here. Secondly, in the first 5 years, a lot of money will have to be invested in education (even if it is free of charge, which is not easy to achieve, the study process entails many additional costs). Further, at least 2-3 years of work will be needed only in order to “recapture” the costs of training. Thirdly, relying on the only source of income in order to achieve wealth, especially active income, is at least short-sighted, but rather simply stupid. Fourthly, it does not take into account how a person plans to provide himself with at least the most necessary things for life: housing, property. By salary? Ridiculous… Due to loans? You will have to repay debts all your life ... And when will that very wealth come? And if you live in a rented apartment, a good part of even a large salary by today's standards will go to pay rent, and there will be nothing left to accumulate wealth. And what if you suddenly get fired from your job in the midst of the financial crisis? How will loans, rent, and other expenses be repaid? You can find a number of other points that directly indicate that such a path in the vast majority of cases is a dead end. Once again I say: look around, and you will see this in many living examples.

Therefore, if you are thinking about how to change yourself and your life for the better, stereotypical thinking, like the one described in the example above, should be discarded: it will not lead you to achieve your goals. It is necessary to look for an effective, real and relevant for the present time way to achieve the goals.

How to do it? First of all, you need to focus on your own financial future, since the achievement of almost any life goals is inextricably linked with the financial component. Roughly speaking, there will be no money - it will not work to achieve the goal. In the example above, a person, by and large, plans how he will earn money first for his institute (paying for his education), then for his employer (performing work for him and earning him a profit). Perhaps - even to the bank (if he takes a loan). But not to yourself!

If you want to start changing, change yourself and your life for the better, you definitely need to immediately start taking care of. Because success in achieving your goals will largely depend on it. Without financial resources you are unlikely to be able to change your life for the better.

The site was created in order to tell you how to change your life for the better, especially with financial side question, but not only. Here you will find a large number useful information, tips and tricks that will help you start changing for the better: both in terms of personal development and in terms of improving your financial condition and standard of living. Join the number of regular readers, study the proposed materials, ask questions in the comments, chat on the forum and apply the information received in practice. I hope that Financial Genius will help change your life for the better! Until we meet again on the pages of the site!

Photo: Kasia Bialasiewicz/Rusmediabank.ru

Constant vague premonition that something is wrong bad dream, frequent irritation, the desire to quit everything ... Perhaps you yourself do not fully understand what is happening to you. But psychologists, who have long observed such symptoms in many people, are sure that such a mood and well-being is a clear sign that it is time to change something in life. Are you not sure? Then check yourself - we have collected the most common and iron signs that it's time to start a new life.

1. Nothing pleases you, and life seems like a “groundhog day”, when each new day is exactly the same as the previous one. If such a state lasts not a day or two or a week, but months, this is a serious reason to think.

2. You don't feel any emotion. is a normal occurrence in human life. It's not about what you discreet person and you don’t show them, the point is that you simply don’t feel them. They tell you bad news - and you don't care, good news - the result is the same. In this way, our brain reacts to severe stress, constant tension and the onset of depression.

3. You live in the past or in the future. You either constantly experience bad moments from the past, or remember the wonderful old times, or live only in dreams of the future - any of the options forces you to fully concentrate on any other period of time, except for the present. No, remembering pleasant moments and rejoicing, sad ones - and learning useful lessons or dreaming a little about plans for the coming years - is not bad and even useful. However, if dreams or memories begin to take over most life, then difficulties begin in the present.

4. You stopped caring about your health and appearance. Is the tooth in need of treatment? Oh, wait until it hurts! Hike to ? No time! Iron the dress? Yes, and it will do! Some even justify their untidiness and unwillingness to take care of themselves by the need to take care of a husband, children, aging parents ...

5. You began to notice strange things behind yourself - for example, when you pick up a book, you re-read it three times to catch the essence, and after writing important email, after sending it, you find many typos in it, although it seems that they checked everything several times. Yes, once everything can be attributed to fatigue and inattention. However, if this is repeated from time to time, this is an occasion to think.

6. You are constantly anxious. It seems that there are no special reasons or that the same circumstances did not cause you such frustration before. As soon as the husband stays ten minutes from work, the imagination paints the darkest pictures, and if the son or daughter does not answer on the mobile, this is generally the end of the world. Even the most ordinary situations cause you to have bouts of excitement and dozens of questions “What if ...” In the face of any possible troubles, you feel helpless, and thinking about the future is simply paralyzing.

7. You stopped developing as a . Childhood dreams have already been forgotten (after all, they are still unrealistic!), There is no desire to learn something new (but why?), You don’t set any goals for yourself (I have enough at home and work) ... We hasten to upset you: if you fell into such a trap, it means things are bad - after all, a person never stands still, he either goes forward or rolls back. If on this moment watching TV series with a plate of sandwiches on your knees seems like the best pastime for you, it's time to change something.

8. You are constantly jealous. Envy is one of the serious symptoms that indicates that you are unhappy with your current life. If everything suits you own share, would you envy other people's successes and joys?!

9. You have not cleaned up your home for a long, long time. A mountain of unwashed dishes, a bunch of things in the armchair because you “didn’t bring” them to the closet, dirty socks under the bed, the wallet is ready to fall apart - but not from money, but from checks and receipts six months ago, bottles in the bathroom have long begun to play the role decor because you forgot the last time you threw empty jars in the trash... And you still keep your shorts in the closet from adolescence, knowing that you will never wear them in your life, as well as a dressing gown that is worn to holes and a tracksuit with shiny knees. It seems like it's time to get down to business - get rid of everything unnecessary, broken, unused, torn, spoiled, small, not your style, tasteless, and also annoying. Then life will seem better!

10. You constantly put off important things for later. You have neither the desire nor the strength to decide something now, as a result, things accumulate according to the snowball principle, and you have no desire to deal with it all the more.

11. You feel about loved ones. Beloved husband, children, parents and friends suddenly began to cause you constant and irresistible irritation. Any little thing can throw you off balance, and previously pleasant conversations with family and friends now seem like stupid and unnecessary chatter. Perhaps this is how your brain reacts to the need for changes in life - and in order to realize this and come to them, it requires some solitude.

Remember: life is a journey, not a destination

A hackneyed but relevant phrase. Live life to the fullest - feel every day, learn new things, and not sacrifice everything for one goal. Don't be discouraged if it doesn't work at first. This is fine.

Be honest with yourself and others

Lies suck energy and make a person unhappy. Just imagine how much you need to remember when lying so as not to accidentally spill the beans. What happiness is here. In addition, if you are not honest with yourself, you cannot grow and develop. And if you lie to others, then trust and intimacy disappear in a relationship.

People are telling lies different reasons. Out of envy, out of unwillingness to offend, fear of opening up or entering into. Being honest is hard, but that's the only way to live life to the fullest.

Learn to accept yourself

We often reminisce about past failures and spend too much time thinking about our own. weaknesses. We think about what we don’t like about ourselves, how to change it, and we believe that we should become different. Wasting your life on such reflections and events from the past means not noticing the present and being closed to the new in the future. Make a conscious decision to love yourself just the way you are. Get rid of the burden of memories and negative thoughts.

Define your values

Having formulated values, it will be easier for you to set life goals that will not contradict them. Stick to your beliefs and don't let others confuse you. After all, living in accordance with your principles is much more pleasant than constantly following the advice of others.

Stop putting yourself down

It is believed that self-criticism helps to develop, but research How to Stop the Self-Criticism and Feel Better About You proved Negative influence this approach both on the person himself and on his attitude towards others. The stricter you are with yourself, the higher the chances of treating others in the same way. Downgrading will not help you become better and achieve your goals. Be kind to yourself.

Replace negative thoughts with attitudes. For example, instead of "I'm a failure," say to yourself, "Things didn't go according to plan. But I will figure out why this happened, and in the future I will not make such mistakes. I will find a way to achieve what I want in another way.”

Analyze self-criticism logically. Instead of “I’m stupid, everyone in the group is smarter than me,” think about whether there are objective reasons to think so. Maybe you're just not preparing well enough for class. Maybe laziness is to blame, but not intelligence. Having analyzed the thought in this way, you will understand what steps you need to take without belittling yourself.

Be flexible

Life is full of change. Be open to new things and learn to adapt to the changes that are happening, even if you don’t like them at first. Take them as an opportunity to get new experience. This kind of positive thinking will help develop flexibility.

Getting fired from Apple is the best thing that ever happened to me. The heavy burden of success has been replaced by the carelessness of a novice, less confident entrepreneur. I have freed myself to enter one of the most fruitful periods of my life.

Steve Jobs, American entrepreneur, CEO of Apple

Keep fit

Taking care of the body is another step on the way to a full life. You have one, and it's important to make sure it's healthy. It's hard to live busy life when it hurts here and it hurts there.

Eat right. Eat as many fruits, vegetables, complex carbohydrates. Try to avoid foods high in sugar, but still treat yourself to a piece of cake or a glass of wine from time to time.

Go in for sports. Regular exercise will help you feel healthier and happier.

Stop forcing yourself

People often force themselves to do things that are at odds with their values ​​and desires. Coercion causes irritation, frustration and sadness. If you get rid of this, then living a full life will become easier.

As soon as "I should" enters your mind, think about why you feel that way. For example, "I need to lose weight." This may be the advice of a doctor or the desire of a person with a different perception of beauty. In the first case, changes are really needed; in the second, they can even be dangerous. Do only what is important to you, not what others demand.

Method 2. Go your own way

Leave your comfort zone

The more often you perform unusual actions for yourself, the higher Anxiety Can Bring Out the Best your performance. How harder task put in front of you, the faster you get used to the new and calmer perceive life's difficulties. Getting out of your comfort zone helps you become more flexible, and we've already found out how important this is.

Start small. Go to a place you don't know anything about. Go on a spontaneous journey or do something at work that you haven't done before.

Be Realistic

Set goals according to your abilities, taking into account your skills and. Strive for what is important to you, and do not compete with others. Achieving what you want should depend only on your needs, but not on the desire to show off or prove something to someone.

Be prepared for things to go wrong

When a person lives a full life, he takes risks. He makes decisions that have consequences. And sometimes they may not turn out as planned. It is important to understand that life is unpredictable, and to treat surprises calmly. The ability to be ready for anything makes it possible to be one step ahead and calculate the options for the development of events.

Look for opportunities to learn

Don't sit still and let life just take its course. Be active, learn new things, make your brain work. Analyze your experience and the experience of others. This will help you be calmer difficult situations and allow you to move forward with confidence.

Know how to thank

Gratitude is not just a feeling - it's a lifestyle. It will help you survive the traumas of the past, if you consider them not as pain, but as a valuable experience, and be grateful to life for it. It will strengthen relationships with loved ones, and without them it is extremely difficult to live a full life.

Tell family, friends, and other important people how happy you are to have them. Share gratitude, do not be afraid to express it, and life will be filled with pleasure and harmony.

Appreciate every moment and don't focus on the bad. Appreciate the beauty of everyday life, be grateful to life even for the little things: a beautiful sunset, good weather and delicious coffee.

The more pleasant little things you notice, the better life will become.

Keep a diary

Try not just to record the events that have occurred, but to analyze them. How did you react, why did it happen, how did you feel then and now, and what would you do if this situation happened again. All this will show what is going well in life, and what needs to be worked on more.

laugh

Laughter is the best medicine. It lowers stress hormone levels and improves mood. Plus, it's contagious. If you laugh, others will, and this is the easiest way to create emotional and social connections.

Don't chase material things

From a large number things you will not become happier. Do not buy impulsively, do not try to get rid of stress through shopping. Buy only what you really need.

If you already have a lot of useless things, donate them to charity. Get rid of everything you don't like and start living a life free from material possessions.

A person picks up the emotions of others as easily as a cold. If you spend a day with happy people you will start to feel better. If you communicate with gloomy and dissatisfied with life, then this will also affect your mood. Only negative. Therefore, it is important not to waste time on toxic people.

Surround yourself with those who care about you, who respect you and others.

But this does not mean that friends and loved ones cannot constructively criticize you. Sometimes you still need someone to point out mistakes. But it is important to feel that people do it with kindness, respect and care. That they really help you get better.

Discuss your needs

Confidently express your thoughts and needs, but remember that others have desires that need to be heard. Be open and honest, but don't blame or judge people.

It's good to be honest with the person that they hurt you. Explain what exactly bothered you. It is bad to accuse him of inhumanity without a specific explanation of the reason.

To prevent people from taking your words as accusations, always say "I". For example, "I felt like my needs weren't important when you didn't pick me up from work" instead of "You didn't even pick me up from work, you don't care about me."

Instead of judging the actions of others, try to understand why they did it. Ask to tell more about the reasons, find out someone else's point of view. If you still disagree with the opinion, tell us why and offer an alternative.

Be selfless

Often the thought that we deserve more is what keeps us from moving forward. Giving, but not receiving in return, we are in people, life, justice. It's hard to live a full life when there is such darkness in your head. Therefore, it is important to share love, kindness, warmth and care disinterestedly.

But this does not mean that you can allow yourself to wipe your feet. Stop any attempts to take advantage of your good attitude.

Forgive yourself and those around you

Hard, but good for the soul. By forgiving, you will be freed from stress, let go of the accumulated negativity and feel light. Learn to forgive people, despite their behavior, and this will help heal spiritual wounds.

It is important to forgive not only others, but also yourself. Stop thinking about mistakes and blaming yourself for what you did. The past cannot be changed. Use this experience as an opportunity to improve. Show yourself the same empathy that you show others.

Accept people for who they are

It can be difficult to communicate with a person who is so different from us. But do not try to change it and adjust it for yourself. Remember that each person is a unique individual who can teach you something new. Be kind and polite in any company. Enjoy the company of other people. Treat everyone the way you would like to be treated.