What to do in an impasse. A hopeless, difficult life situation - how to find a way out of an impasse

Decor elements 30.09.2019
Decor elements

Date: 2015-05-13

Hello site readers.

In this article, we will analyze a serious topic: . Personally, I believe that not every person in his life finds himself in such a difficult situation. And yet, most people find themselves in such a trap at least once in their lives. And what to do when you don’t know what to do, where and how to look for a way out. You will learn about it here in this article.

First, I want to tell you what you should not do when you are in a dead end. Unfortunately, many people start using alcohol or drugs when they think you are writing: "Gone". I don’t know why they do it, but a person will definitely not find a way out in a bottle or a syringe. On the contrary, the situation will become even worse, as narcotic drugs overshadow the ability to think clearly and assess the situation. And if you are in stalemate, the worst thing you can do is start drinking alcohol or using drugs. Don't you dare act like that.

Some people start whining. There is even a parable on the subject:

“Two friends were walking in the forest and found a cave. They decided to go there out of curiosity. They were so carried away walking through the dark cave that they did not notice how they got lost in it. Realizing this, one of the friends began to shout:

We will die, no one will find us.

A day passed, and he kept exclaiming about his impending death. And later his friend said to him:

“Maybe we should look for a way out?”

And the same thing happens in other people's lives. As something happened, they begin to whimper instead of looking for a way out. There is even a way out hopeless situation, you just have to look for it. That's why, important rule- keep calm. The answer may come to you in a few days, weeks or even months. This happened many times in my life, and I became convinced that calmness is strength.

Now for some practice. You still have to take a piece of paper and start making a divergent map to get out of the impasse. A divergent map means several ways to solve a problem. For example, they were fired from their jobs. For some people, this is already a dead end. But the way out is still on the surface. After all, you can post your resume on the Internet, buy newspapers and start looking for vacancies on your own, attend interviews, ask acquaintances and friends about job opportunities, learn a new profession, or even create your own business.

That is, your task is not to be like the person who sat and shouted that the end had come to them, but to become the person who will look for a way out of the cave. The exit is not always found immediately. Still, you'll have to be patient. And that's what I want you to buy. I myself many times looked for ways out of difficult situations and realized that patience is a powerful force. It is this strength that will help you not to merge in your attempts.

Sometimes, in order for the problem to be solved, it is necessary to let go of the situation. This means not dwelling on what happened. For example, if a new job is not being looked for, then you can temporarily score on searches and take care of yourself. This does not mean at all that now you have to wait for manna from heaven. Are you still looking for new job, but without fanaticism and any expectations. And I am sure that when a person goes to something without tension, everything works out for him.

In a difficult situation, a friend can help you find a way out. Most people (sometimes me) rely too much on themselves. They distance themselves from outside help instead of accepting it. This is their big misconception. Ego and pride make it difficult for a person to even think a little about asking for help. I'd rather decide everything myself, and be a hero, than someone will help me, after which I will feel miserable and insignificant. Hence the task for you, think about those people who will help you. Don't be afraid to ask them for help.

All dead ends are only in your head. Learn to look at the situation from the outside, thereby moving away from it. Are you good at giving advice to other people? Now give yourself some advice. Start having a dialogue with yourself. That is, ask yourself a question, and then try to answer it. You will definitely get the answer, but whether you accept it or not, this is your business.

I strongly recommend that you mentally support yourself. Your mind must be calm. And the following statement will help you with this: "Everything will be great!". Whenever you are nervous about feeling trapped, repeat this phrase. She . The second thought that should be spinning in your head is as follows: "Everything that is not done, everything is done for the better". You have heard this phrase hundreds and hundreds of times. And now you need to repeat it hundreds and hundreds of times.

How often, when we find ourselves in a difficult situation that requires a strong-willed solution or elimination of problems, we begin to think that this is it - a Hopeless Situation. Having believed once that there is no way out of your situation, you allow pessimism and self-pity to take over, and you fall into vicious circle own and . I propose an alternative approach - to believe that there is always a way out, and not one, you just need to make an effort to see it. The main part of these efforts will be aimed at maintaining a positive attitude and maintaining faith in a successful resolution of the situation.

So, there are no hopeless situations - this is a fact. And then what happens - what do we take for "hopeless conditions"?

  1. The need to make a decision. It's complicated, scary and requires you to take responsibility for your choice and its consequences. If the choice is wrong, there will be no one to blame but ourselves, so our consciousness closes and pretends that there is no way out, and we, in turn, play along with it. Convincing yourself that nothing depends on you is the approach of a weak person. Take courage and remind yourself that control is always in your hands - yes, you can make a mistake, but this is your decision, independent and balanced, which means you are an adult and responsible person.

    What to do:

    • - Mistakes are your personal, invaluable experience that you can always use for the benefit of your development.
    • Take advantage of our tips - take control of your life in own hands don't be a victim.
  2. The fear of change can paralyze even a smart and developed person in all respects. Such is the nature of man - it is more comfortable for him to exist in conditions of certainty, and all the unknown scares and has a much lower level of comfort. Refusing to do something out of fear that your life will change is not stupid, but terribly inefficient. Change is always for the better - tell yourself this day and night until you believe it, and then you will find that you mistakenly considered your situation a hopeless one.

    What to do:

    • Change it to a constructive one, and your life will pick up a new pace of development, just like you.
    • Read - these daredevils have changed not only themselves and their lives, but also the world in which we live, is this not an incentive to joyfully plunge into the coming changes?
  3. Convenience of a "familiar place". A person can adapt to any conditions, even the most destructive and uncomfortable for himself. Being in a dysfunctional marriage or working at a job where you are humiliated and not appreciated, and justifying it by saying that there is no other way out means indulge your complexes and low self-esteem. If self-esteem is very low, a person may even stay in a relationship where violence is used against him - because it is convenient, convenient from his point of view. Trying to change the situation and get away from the role that you are used to playing is difficult, but necessary.

    What to do:

    • To work with - without this work, any attempts to get off the ground will be short-lived and will entail a return to the previous circumstances.
    • To understand and accept that you deserve more and better - for this you need.
  4. Some people try to pass off banal laziness as a hopeless situation. If a person does not want to make any effort to find a solution, he directs them to looking for excuses. Excuses invented for others are gradually accepted on faith and consciousness, and now a person is sincerely convinced that in his circumstances there is no way out. And you just need to want to change your life and direct your efforts in the right direction.

    What to do:

    • Learn - no one will do it for you.
    • Work to get better - just work, not try or try.
  5. The pleasure of complaining. It is common for many people to complain about their bitter fate, evil people around them and unfortunate circumstances instead of something. do. The goal is to get confirmation from others that they are right - “there is no way out, I am unhappy, I didn’t even have a chance, given what kind of childhood I had ...”.

    What to do:

    • Stop whining!
    • Learn why, and how to channel energy from complaining into action.
  6. devotion to standards. “That’s the way it is” is the worst excuse for not acting. By whom it is accepted, why and why this should be reflected in your life, it does not matter at all if you decide to justify your "hopeless" situation with someone else's opinion, traditions and established orders. In this world, neither those around, nor the rulers of states, nor anyone else don't define you, only you! You yourself determine where the limit of your possibilities is, so call them limitless, limitless, instead of hiding behind the notorious "it's customary."

    What to do:

    • , although it is new and scary - you need it.
    • Use technique to release energy and direct it to creation.

Of course, first of all, I am writing these tips to remind myself that there are no hopeless situations, but I also want to convey this to you. They really do not exist, there are difficult ones, which are points of our growth if we choose the path of development, not stagnation.

Instruction

Although crisis situations and knock a person out of his usual life rut, but on the other hand, they provide him with the opportunity to overestimate his life values. After all, it is at this time that he can look at his life from a different angle and assess the circumstances.

To get out of the crisis, use one of the three main directions. First, never put up with a problem. This only indicates that the usual life attitude has exhausted itself, and the next life stage has ended. Bring the matter to the end, take stock and move on to a new stage in your life.

Secondly, if you do not want to change anything in your life, then try to reflect on the problems that have arisen. Draw conclusions for yourself that will help you accept the current situation.

And finally, you can adapt to the circumstances, go with the flow, relying on the actions and decisions of other people. In this case, the crisis situation will sooner or later lead you to living conditions that you will be forced to accept.

Any of these options has the right to exist, and you can use each of them separately or in combination with each other. Each situation will require its own solution, because life is diverse in its manifestations, and no situation will be similar to another.

Think of the problem as a task that needs to be solved later, the acquired knowledge will help you build your life exactly the way you want it. But all these puzzles must be solved as they become available, because the more unresolved problems, the higher the wall you have built, and the more difficult it will be to destroy it.

Do not go into the problem with your head, but try to realize the opportunity to put your feelings and thoughts in order. Prayers, meditations, doing what you love, such as gardening or needlework, will help you with this. Go swimming, take a walk in the park, read your favorite book or watch a movie. Fulfill your old dream: learn foreign language, conquer Everest or throw trash out of the house. The result will not keep you waiting, and soon you will be able to feel that the unfavorable situation has turned to you on the other side, there will be changes for the better and new opportunities.

Related videos

note

How to find a way out of a hopeless situation? Life presents each person with a variety of, sometimes unimaginable situations. We can't even imagine what tomorrow holds for us. That is why parents should form a trusting relationship with their children in order to always be aware of their problems and come to the rescue in time, showing ways out of difficult situations.

Useful advice

Do you know the feeling of a hopeless situation? I think almost everyone knows. And it seems that everyone knows (at least the practitioners of Simoron) that there is always a way out - absolutely and without exception. On the other hand, finding this very way out is sometimes not at all easy. However, it is worth remembering the funny phrase of Nikolai Fomenko in time: “Even if you have been eaten, you always have two ways out.” Well, or like this: "From a hopeless situation, the exit is in the same place as the entrance."

There are times in every person's life when it seems like they don't. exit. In such a situation, it is better not to waste time thinking about the causes of what happened, but to direct your mental strength to solve the problem.

Instruction

To begin with, accept the situation as a fact and understand that it has already happened and there is no turning back.

If you think it is possible, then seek the help of other people, whether it be family, friends or acquaintances. You may find it easier to talk to a stranger or turn to religion.

There are people who are better at coping with problems alone. If you belong to this category, do not force yourself and do not force to communicate if you do not want to.

Learn physical relaxation techniques. It may be different breathing techniques or the basics of yoga.

Get out in nature more often. It will be nice to walk near the reservoir. Many people assume that water procedures they help to cleanse not only the body, but also the soul, so swim more and, if you wish, visit the bathhouse.

Pay attention to physical activity. It doesn't have to be a sport. If you enjoy cleaning your home, gardening, or garage, then this can be a solution too.

Revisit your old hobby or pick up a new one. Collecting, visiting museums, needlework, everything that can distract you from sad thoughts.

We give advice right and left that there is a way out of any unpleasant situation, and not even one. We tune in to the positive and try to console others that not everything is as bad as it seems at first glance. But when we ourselves are overcome by troubles that are coming from all sides, the advice that we ourselves offered looks simply ridiculous and helpless.

What to do in a difficult life situation, where you see one dead end? Exist actionable advice how to proceed in such a case.

1. First of all, try to calm down and stop. No need to quickly rush into the pool with your head and take incomprehensible actions that can lead to more big problems. You need to pause and decide where you are and how you ended up in this position. Take some time to think about why it turned out the way it did, and not completely different. When you can find the entrance, then you will find the exit in one moment.

2. Effective advice on how to get out of the impasse is to get rid of the emotions that overwhelm you at that moment. Fear, anger, disappointment interfere with normal concentration in front of the resulting problem. Often, our negative emotions, which take on a huge scale, we make an elephant out of a fly, and it’s done, we don’t see any way out, one dead end. If you want to smash something to smithereens - do it, if you want to scream and swear - go ahead, give vent to your anger, do not keep destructive energy in yourself.

3. When you are overcome by complete devastation, only then will bright thoughts begin to come into your head and everything will become clear from a different angle. Prepare yourself tea with lemon and ginger, or make hot coffee, energy drinks help your brain work faster. Take a piece of paper and start writing down absolutely all ideas for getting out of an impasse, even the most absurd ones, in such cases all means are good.

4. Do not think alone, seek help from your comrades and loved ones who have not turned away in difficult times. There is a proverb "One head is good, but two is better." Perhaps they will offer their own options that will be useful to you, because sometimes it is more visible from the outside.

5. The next step will be complete analysis suggested ideas. Consider all the pros and cons. Make three thorough plans to get out of the crisis. Plan A and B are the most effective, and Plan C is the back-up. Clearly thought-out scenarios, several options, give much more percentage of success than one.

6. In a difficult life situation, gather your strength and spirit and begin to put into action your anti-crisis plan. Going step by step, not stepping back, you will achieve what you want and get out of the troubles surrounding your life, and understanding what to do will come by itself.

7. In difficult times, people who care about you and to whom you are very dear will help you survive misfortunes. Don't push them away or isolate them from your society, let them help you. You can even ask them for help yourself, in such situations you understand who the most devoted and faithful people are.

8. In our life, we rely a lot on circumstances, while realizing that they do not bode well. You can't do that. We create our own destiny, so pull yourself together and do not let circumstances take over you.

9. Another in an efficient way how to get out of the impasse, is to exclude people with . In the environment of each person, there is sure to be such a person who will exaggerate and lower faith in yourself. Such people do not see happiness and positive moments, they have only one negative around them. If possible, avoid them, do not let them lower your self-esteem, otherwise, you will panic and give up.

10. When you are in trouble, look for something that will motivate you during the time that you get out of the current situation. Strive to associate with those who believe in you and know that you can withstand any blow.

11. In difficult moments, you should not be afraid to take risks and think about mistakes, everyone has them. It will be stupidity that you will sit idly by. Each of your mistakes will be a lesson from which you will draw useful and necessary information for yourself.

12. Do not listen to those who say that they know how you better live and be. They will constantly remind you and poke you for past mistakes. Send them away from you, let them hang noodles on the ears of others, the same losers as they are. This is your life and only you can decide if you can get out of trouble or not. Believe in yourself and you will succeed. You are not a loser, but a winner!

Instruction

Many psychologists argue that without a detailed analysis of a difficult situation, it is impossible to find a way out of it. Therefore, first of all, you need to formulate the essence of the problem. However, you should not start such an analysis by looking for who is to blame for your misfortune, as this will be a waste of energy that you will need to find the most pleasant solutions. So sit down quietly, grab a pen and paper, and describe the situation, taking as much time as you can. more small parts.

After that, try to think through everything possible options further development events. So, for example, you can write what will happen if you do or say one way or another, or if you do nothing at all. Next, describe in detail all the consequences of potential decisions. At the same time, it is worth noting not only the possible options for achieving positive results. Describe also the worst consequences you can think of.

Your loved ones can also help in solving problems, so if you want, contact them for advice. If you don’t want to burden them with your troubles, you can use the Internet and ask for help with a way out of this situation on the forum or. Perhaps this is what will push you to the right decisions. Also, do not forget that humanity has managed to find ways to solve many problems, and it would be nice if you took advantage of the experience of those who managed to find a way out of similar situations. Therefore, try to study as much information on this topic as possible.

Next, you need to choose the most successful out of all the options for getting out of the situation. However, do not get hung up on the problem and do not go into it with your head. Try to relax and give yourself time to organize your feelings and thoughts. For example, a long stay on fresh air, doing your favorite hobby, yoga or sports. You can also listen to your favorite music or watch movies. Water procedures also help to relax, so you can treat yourself to a bath with aromatic oils.

It is easier to deal with a problem when it is alone and there is time to solve it. But if difficulties fall on your head in a continuous series one after another, and there is no opportunity to shift at least some of them onto other people's shoulders, then you have to act differently.

Instruction

Don't escalate the situation. The internal reassurance “I can solve everything, but I need time for this” is much better than the attitude “Nothing works, I can’t grasp everything in a row.” Therefore, a lot depends on how you perceive the situation and treat it. If you can’t think positively, then at least have a sober and realistic look.

Distribute problems. No matter how difficult situations are, there are always important and urgent issues. The main thing is to correctly determine the place of each difficulty and act accordingly. After all, if you get distracted by the urgent, the important will suffer. And how it will happen (or not) depends on the person setting priorities.

Analyze the situation. Instead of internally tossing and turning, sit down and write down the answers to the following questions:

What is the essence of the problem and what contributed to its occurrence?
- What is the worst thing it can turn into?
- What can be done in such a situation?
- How to prevent it by choosing alternative solutions?

By answering these questions clearly, calmly and without emotion, you will understand in which direction to move on.

Consult. This is especially important when the situation concerns not only you. Keep in mind that people related to it have the right to participate in the discussion of the issue along with you. But even if you directly have difficulties, then a look from the outside will not be superfluous - you may hear a decision that you could not come to on your own due to excessive worries.

We recommend reading

Top