Stress situations are of two types. When we actually have something to worry about, and when there is no real reason to worry. If you are running through the forest from a wild boar right now, then no matter what advice we give you on how to calm down and stop being nervous in stressful situations, it is unlikely that you will find it effective. It is very difficult to keep calm and composure at such a moment, isn't it? But in general, if you think carefully, what is in this moment you are under a lot of stress, it does you a huge favor, because thanks to the release of adrenaline into the blood, you find the strength in yourself to run.

On the other hand, if you are sitting at an interview or you have a regular ordinary exam, and you are waiting for your turn in front of the audience, and nothing threatens your safety at this moment, but you feel that your hands are shaking, your palms are sweating, you are pounding, you If you can’t pull yourself together, then such stress can hardly be called natural. Because not everyone experiences it. When you studied at the university, there were probably people in your group who absolutely did not understand what you could worry about here at all, they ran the very first to answer questions and thanks to this they could leave before anyone else. So, such anxiety usually does not bring a person any benefit. In order to figure out how to get rid of it, let's first talk about where it comes from, and then - what to do with it and how to defeat it.

Why are you so scared?

Physiological reasons.

1. Problems with the spine.

Pinched nerve roots can cause anxiety. There are even studies on this topic that show a very clear relationship, for example, this study Mood and anxiety disorders in patients with chronic low back and neck pain caused by disc herniation.

2. Endocrine disorders.

Diabetes, disease thyroid gland etc.A drop in blood sugar can also cause feelings of fear and intense unreasonable excitement.

3. Nutrition.

For example, the abuse of caffeine.In the article, we said that people who drink a lot of coffee in the afternoon often complain about high level nervousness.

psychological reasons.

1. The habit of worrying.

You probably have anxious parents. Children always copy the behavior of their parents. It is difficult to have a strong nervous system and not feel nervous if this is the behavior pattern that you have been observing since childhood. Your parents most likely adopted this from their parents, or acquired this habit due to other reasons, which we will describe below.

2. A bad experience that your brain remembers.

Do you know that in order to remember something for a very long time, or even forever, you need to add emotional coloring to this event or information.
If a situation happened to you in which you experienced very strong discomfort and fear, and you did not have the opportunity to quickly stop this discomfort, for example, you got stuck in an elevator and turned off the light there. The button to call the dispatcher did not work, it was Friday and you were afraid that you would have to sit there all weekend. Then, of course, the next time you enter a closed room, you will be afraid of repetition.

Or, for example, at the school where you studied, your teacher, for some personal reasons, felt hostility towards you and constantly made fun of you in front of the whole class, and since a person is a social animal, the fear of being rejected by other people is quite strong for most people. . And therefore, making a presentation at work or sitting in an exam, those emotions that you once experienced will remind you of yourself again and again, because this situation will seem similar to the brain.

3. You have been trained. The coming of the end of the world.

There is another option related to family upbringing. This is when parents are not nervous, but too strict and aggressive. Well, for example, for a bad grade, you were always punished.

Or your parents were inclined to exaggerate any of your mistakes, you tore your jacket - this is the end of the world, you didn’t wash the dishes - a scandal, and now, even if no one punishes you for your mistake, your brain will be anxious. He's so used to it.

How to calm down and stop being nervous in stressful situations? What to do?

First you need to understand which of the reasons is yours. Sit down and remember. If you suspect that the cause of your unreasonable fear is physiological, then you should consult a doctor or adjust your diet, if the cause is in it. If the reason is psychological, then having understood the reason, it may already become a little easier for you. And then you can use our advice.

1. In order to learn how to stop being nervous and worried, you will have to be a little nervous and worried. Clinical psychologists will call this method cognitive therapy, and ordinary people will say that this method is called “look your fear in the eye” (or in the face - which is correct?). The point is to put yourself in the situation that makes you anxious. But do not forget that we are talking about situations that are safe for you, in which you experience unjustified discomfort.Well, for example, you are very nervous at interviews, so in order to stop being nervous, you need to go through 20-30-40 interviews.

Or you are afraid to ride in an elevator - you will have to ride it 10 times a day.
Those. if you had any unsuccessful experience or a behavior model adopted from your parents, then you change it by creating new good experiences and new behaviors.
At first it will be scary, but over time, the anxiety will recede and you will feel better.

2. Allow fear to be. Don't fight it, just accept it. And ideally, even try to intentionally strengthen it. This method is called the method of paradoxical intention. Those. If you're giving a presentation and you think you're going to faint from excitement, then you need to force yourself to faint. As you understand, no one succeeds, and causeless excitement recedes by itself.

3. Actually try to breathe a little. Do not throw this option aside, because “some kind of bullshit”. And slowly, time after time, inhale-exhale, inhale-exhale. It helps a lot of people.

4. Engage in strengthening your nervous system as a whole.
Go in for sports. Don't overload yourself with negative information. Choose positive films, music. Learn not to get hung up, to switch from problems to business - in fact, this is also a skill, a habit that anyone can instill in themselves if they wish.

One more tip I would like to leave for the conclusion of this article. This tip is about another good way to stop being nervous and worried. In order to relieve anxiety, you need to get very angry with yourself and tell yourself that you really will allow stupid fears and anxiety to constantly spoil your life. And if you really succeed, then perhaps you can finally achieve the long-awaited calmness and your fears will recede.

Scanpix

Enjoy life in modern world- a whole science that is not taught in school. Such a course is not included in the compulsory university curriculum, as, for example, a course in philosophy. And in order to learn inner peace, many take time, and some begin to learn this only when stress becomes chronic.

How not to fall victim to time troubles and critical situations, says Passion.ru.

How to be calm

Sometimes it happens that we simply do not accept our anxiety if it lasts for a long time, and in this state we resolve all issues. On the way we break a bunch of firewood, which we ourselves then “stumble over”.

The easiest way to calm the nerves is, of course, to put in order the area of ​​​​life, because of which the stressful state followed. But this, as you know, is not done quickly.

The first thing you should do is accept your nervous state and assure yourself that you will definitely deal with all your difficulties, but gradually and after you calm down, pull yourself together.

Decide for yourself that the breakdown or stress you are currently experiencing is a severe cold and you need a "sick leave". Only when you are “cured” will you have the strength to change anything. In a word, allow yourself to take a break from everything and free up time for calming down. Otherwise, everything else will be simply useless, because mentally you will always be with your stress, so no other ways can get rid of it.

15 ways to stop being nervous

If you need to calm down urgently, one of the methods we offer will definitely help you. You can use them all together severe stress, as well as separately.

• 1. Practice breathing

Breathing affects our mood and health like nothing else. And if we were more observant, we could notice that in different emotional states we breathe very differently. In order to calm down, it is enough to take control of your breathing and perform simple techniques. Having done it once, you can get rid of short-term tension, doing it regularly, you can really “pat up” your nervous system.

Deep breathing: straighten your back, straighten your shoulders, inhale deeply and exhale slowly completely, stretching the exhalation and making it longer than the inhalation. After exhaling, take a short pause.
Breathing technique from yoga “kapalabhati”. It focuses attention on the exit, which helps to calm the nervous system (while inhaling, on the contrary, helps to increase tone). How to practice correctly this species breathing, see the video:

Be careful with breathing exercises (do not do it for a long time or stop if you feel discomfort), do not get carried away with them if you have not practiced anything like this before.

• 2. Formulate a mental attitude

Without the right attitude, everything else is just short-term methods that will end in a well-defined time frame. But if you supplement them with a philosophical outlook on life, then you will definitely succeed in calming your nerves. Such attitudes, passed through myself and experienced, such as “everything is for the better”, “I can’t control everything and therefore let go”, “everything will be decided over time”, “I still can’t influence it, so I’ll be calm”, “ I can always ask for help.”

In a word, you need to find some kind of calm mentally, and even such simple installations that you need to believe in will help you a lot. If you adhere to a certain belief system, for example, a certain religion or belief system, then it will be even easier for you: you will definitely find the answer there, what is happening and what to do. Usually, simply knowing what's going on and why it's happening is enough to give you peace of mind.

• 3. Take a shower or bath

Contact with water is one of the most simple ways calm the nerves and wash away the energy burden of stress. Taking a warm shower, especially before bed, will help you clean up. It is better not to indulge in contrast showers or douches, as they, on the contrary, have an exciting effect on the nervous system.

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And if you have the opportunity to sit in the bath with your favorite aromas and with your favorite music, without thinking about anything, then be sure to do it. It is advisable to put on clothes made of soft, natural fabrics or go to bed after taking a warm shower.

• 4. Organize your comfort

Comfortable conditions - a comfortable place to sleep, fresh bedding, clean room calm the nervous system and help you relax and, at a minimum, it is easier to fall asleep and rejuvenate.

• 5. Find “time for yourself”

Postpone at least for a while all the questions that concern you, do not try to control everything. Set aside time just for yourself. This does not mean that you should go to salons and please yourself in every possible way (although, of course, you can). Making time for yourself in times of stress is just letting yourself forget that you have to do something else: fix your personal life, solve problems at work and/or with your parents/family, look for a job, pay your rent, etc.

With strong and constant stress on the nervous system, it’s good to go to a sanatorium or resort - where you can do nothing and worry about nothing.

• 6. Massage your head and face

Focused on the head a large number of nerve endings and many people unconsciously, nervously, run through their hair and make light massage. Do it consciously: “walk” your fingers like a comb over the scalp from the forehead to the back of the head. Massage movements rub your cheeks, forehead, rub your temples in a circular motion away from you.

• 7. Eat sweets

In times of nervous tension, you can eat sweets "legally" - isn't that soothing? It is said that sweet foods are necessary for the production of certain hormones in the body, which allow you to overcome tension. Remember that sweet food is not only cakes, buns and sweets, but also dried fruits, candied fruits, dark chocolate.

In a word, do not get carried away and do not seize stress, otherwise, due to excessive passion for sweets, you may soon have a new reason for worry.

• 8. Get moving

Any physical activity (especially targeted) will help improve blood circulation, which will additionally supply your organs with the necessary substances. In addition, this way you will get rid of the clamps, and this will allow energy to move better through your body.

You can walk, dance, do yoga, do exercises or stretch. But do not strain too much, your task is only to shake yourself up a little. Listen to yourself, if now you want to lie down more calmly, then it is better to postpone all motor activities until you have the strength for them.

• 9. Rearrange

They say that if you rearrange 27 objects in the environment that surrounds you, this will help the energy around you to circulate more freely, which will have a beneficial effect on your emotional state. In general, any activity related to ordering - sorting out clothes, books, cleaning the room will help you calm down. In addition, putting things in order in the outer space will psychologically set you up for the inner order.

• 10. Draw, color

Drawing has long been known for its healing and calming effect. But if for some reason you cannot draw even the simplest things, buy a children's coloring book and colored pencils and just color the pictures.

• 11. Use aromatherapy

Essential oils of lavender, lemon balm, geranium, mandarin, orange, basil, chamomile, patchouli, ylang-ylang, bergamot will help you stabilize your emotional condition. You can either simply inhale them using an aroma lamp, or take baths with them or do massages and rubbing. Before using, check the dosage of the oil, as an excessive amount can bring exactly the opposite effect.

• 12. Sleep and eat right

In general, sleep and proper nutrition- a guarantee of no stress for any person, but during nervous tension they are especially needed. Get enough sleep for the amount of time your body rests. Consume healthy food, which, if it does not calm you down, then, in any case, will not become a reason for additional excitement.

A person who is accustomed to constantly keep everything under control, even a small nervous stress after a certain time (when the stability limit is over) can greatly knock down.

14. Take a sedative

Modern science offers many types of sedatives - and tablets, and drops, and infusions, and teas, and herbs. Note that there are preparations created exclusively on herbs, and there are actually herbs themselves, and all this in the form of a course will be useful for a healthy person to completely stabilize the nervous state. Soothing herbs include valerian, St. John's wort, peppermint, lavender, chamomile.

However, try not to abuse this kind of calming the nerves, since the phrase “calm as an elephant” was not at all unreasonable, and over time, a sedative can dull not only nervous reactions that are undesirable for you, but also necessary ones, which is unlikely to make your life easier and better.

• 15. Consult a specialist

If none of the recommendations helped you, it makes sense to contact a psychologist or psychotherapist. The doctor will talk to you, run tests, work with you on stressful situations and their causes, and show you how to deal with nervous disorders effectively.

Stress is haunting modern man literally at every step, which is why it is important to learn how to remain calm and composure in any situation. It is not always easy to pull yourself together and calm down without the help of sedatives, but if you wish, with the help of special exercises recommended by psychologists and regular practice, you can strengthen the nervous system and bring the body into a stable state.

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Why does stress occur?

In anticipation important events a person has a feeling of anxiety, nervousness increases, and as a result he experiences stress. Most often, discomfort is preceded by the following situations:

• problems at work;
• family troubles;
• impending responsible events, such as an exam, public performance etc.

Nervousness has both psychological and physiological causes. Physiology is associated with nervous system, and from the side of psychology, a person may suffer from a feeling of self-doubt, have a tendency to experiences of a different nature, and excitement for the expected result also sometimes affects.

Some people are constantly in a state of anxiety: as soon as a difficult situation improves, they will certainly have another cause for concern. The whole life takes place in incessant stress, which negatively affects the mood, physical condition and self-esteem.

A person who is able to get annoyed for any reason does not know how to control and control emotions, this spoils relationships at home, in a team at work, etc.

Anxiety can arise even for no apparent reason. Nervousness usually appears in situations that a person considers dangerous or significant for himself. AT Everyday life the main cause of stress is the fear of failure and the fear of appearing in front of others in an unsightly light. To calm down and pull yourself together, you need to determine the cause of nervousness, and only then proceed to eliminate it.

The most effective ways to deal with anxiety

Effective recommendations of specialists in the field of psychology will help you stop being nervous, find peace in your soul and start living calmly. It is important to understand that the tendency to nervousness is not a natural reaction of the body to stressful situation, but a banal habit that you can get rid of.

Proven ways to take your mind off things:

Psychologists' advice	Guide to action
Analyze your own fears	The cause of most fears is self-doubt. To start changing your life better side, you should carefully analyze all fears and acknowledge their existence. It is recommended to make a list of problems. On the left, write situations that can be changed, on the right - unsolvable. This approach will allow you to calm down, because there is no point in worrying and fearing everything in vain if you cannot change anything. It's also pointless to worry if the problem is solvable.
Think back to childhood	Many of the problems present in adult life are rooted in deep childhood. If the parents set the child as an example of the neighboring children and did not notice his merits, in 99 cases out of 100 people grow up unsure of themselves. In such a situation, you need to understand that all people are different. Each has its own merits and demerits. It is necessary to accept yourself with all imperfections and sincerely love
To rest good	A day of rest and maximum relaxation will help stop driving, freaking out and worrying about trifles. The fast pace of life makes it impossible to take a break. The result is constant stress. You need to disconnect from duties for a while and arrange a day off: read a book, watch TV shows, take a walk on fresh air, sleep well, get up, not on an alarm clock, but when you want, take a bath with aromatic oils and soothing herbs, pamper yourself with sweets. On this day, it is recommended to do what you love, for which there is not enough time in the normal rhythm of life, and just enjoy life.
Cook or order your favorite dish	Food is a powerful source of pleasure. Delicious food - great way stop worrying and worrying over trifles. The main thing is not to overdo it so that excess weight does not add to the existing problem.
To watch a movie	Watching films - good way have a great time alone or with friends, allowing you to temporarily abstract from pressing problems
Get rid of the source of stress	Not always a person can afford a whole day of good rest. This recommendation will help you become calm in the short term. To overcome negative thoughts, stop getting angry and annoyed, you need to take a break for a few minutes and just do nothing during this time.
Speak the problem out loud	Sometimes a person just needs to be heard. In this case, the best way out of the situation would be to discuss the disturbing situation with a loved one.
To walk outside	Fresh air saturates the body with oxygen and serves as an excellent panacea for anxiety and stress. During lunch break or after work, it is recommended to take a walk in the fresh air. You can get a couple of stops to your house and walk
Engage in physical exercise	Physical activity has a beneficial effect on the psycho-emotional state. Scientists have proven that a person who is actively involved in sports is able to withstand stress and control their own emotions. A morning jog, 20-minute exercise, dancing or yoga can do wonders for mood and self-esteem. Even if you are too lazy to go in for sports, initially you just need to force yourself, then it will become a habit
sleep well	Dream - the best medicine from all diseases. Chronic lack of sleep becomes a source of ongoing stress. A person needs to sleep at least 7-8 hours a day

Learning to live and respond in a new way is quite possible if you constantly practice resting properly. It takes 21 days for a person to master new skills, then the discomfort will disappear, and the habit will become a part of everyday life.



How to calm down before an exam

During the exam, many people worry too much, which negatively affects the future mark. The human brain is focused not on the correct answer, but on the fear of failure. Fear of failure prevents action, paralyzes.

The following tips will help you stay in control:

1. 1. Stop thinking about failure as the end of the world. You need to pass the exam, but life will not end, and the world will not collapse if the teacher does not count the answer.
2. 2. It is recommended to draw up a plan for preparing for the exam in advance and strictly follow it, then the probability of failure will be minimal. Thorough preparation will add confidence, so that anxiety during the process will be much less.
3. 3. In the evening before the exam, you should refresh all the information in your memory by briefly going over the main theses. It is better to go to bed a little earlier to rest and gain strength before the crucial stage.
4. 4. Active rest, sports and physical labor. Even a small charge can switch thoughts in a different direction and give the brain the opportunity to rest.
5. 5. It is recommended to take a shower before leaving the house. The sound and feel of flowing water is great for relieving tension and helping to cool emotions.



Express help: how to quickly pull yourself together in a stressful situation

When overwhelmed by sad thoughts, fear of the future and other negative emotions you can use the following techniques:

Way	Description
	If irritation, anger, anger, fear overcome or you are very nervous in the middle of the day, it is recommended to use the following technique: turn on the tap and just watch how the jet flows. A glass of water, drunk slowly, works better than the strongest antidepressants and brings you to life
Special breathing technique	Breathing in a certain rhythm allows you to quickly recover and calm down. You need to breathe as follows: inhale for 4 counts, hold the breath in yourself for 2 counts and exhale smoothly for 4 counts. Only you need to breathe not with your chest, but with a diaphragm, that is, with your stomach
	This method is especially good when you want to throw out anger and other negative emotions on another person. In this case, you need to take a breath and mentally count to ten.
Write a letter	Most effective method to overcome stress and release negative emotions - write a letter. After all the troubles are imprinted on a sheet, you should tear it into small pieces and burn it, imagining how all real problems are burned along with paper
cry	Negative emotions just need an outlet. Sometimes you don't have to hold back tears to calm down. Crying will help to quickly and effectively relieve stress and remove from the body. toxic substances

How to stay calm during an important meeting

If neither the emotional mood, nor the breathing practices, nor other methods work, and the excitement is still present when talking with an important person or people, one should depict external calmness and equanimity.

Demonstration of outer peace helps to find inner harmony and relax during important meeting. Not only well-being determines facial expressions, this rule also works flawlessly in reverse direction. It is recommended to smile, follow gestures and avoid closed poses - this will allow you to position the interlocutor towards you and tune in with him on the same wavelength.

Folk recipes

If the above methods did not give the desired effect, they will come to the rescue folk remedies. Herbal preparations will help calm the nerves at home - they do not have a negative impact on health, unlike medications.

Herbal preparations are considered stronger, which can be purchased at any pharmacy or prepared independently. This will require the following ingredients:

• valerian root;
• sweet clover;
• dried hawthorn flowers;
• peppermint leaves;
• hop cones;
• motherwort.

A spoonful of the mixture should be poured with 0.4 liters of boiling water and let it brew. It is recommended to drink tea before going to bed.

However medicinal herbs can be used not only in the form of tea, one more effective remedy against stress - fragrant sachet pads. It is recommended to place them anywhere at home, and if necessary, take them with you to work or carry them in a car.

A glass of warm milk with a teaspoon of honey will also help to calm down in the middle of the day.

September 14, 2014 --- Anna |

For those who are faced with sudden (frequent) mood swings, who can write to themselves - “I’m freaking out all the time, but I don’t see any reason”, and often - “when I calm down - I see that it was possible to do without screaming / swearing / tears”, it is important figure out: what happened, that you began to freak out "seemingly for no reason."

Below is a list of the 5 most popular reasons why even the smallest things can annoy you, why you can’t do without the “nuts”, and how to stop freaking out and nervous about the little things.

1. Causes - physiological.

As one of the first options to consider is physiology. You need to check:

thyroid condition,

Hormonal background (tests for hormones).

As a rule, if the matter is in the thyroid gland, then taking the drugs that the doctor will prescribe will help you quickly notice the difference. People become calmer, less and less often they break into a cry or stop “just a little - immediately into tears”.

Trite, but true. The first step is to go to the clinic.

2. The reason is a change in lifestyle.

Strong stress can give “failures” on all fronts. In fact, if you:

got married / got married
- changed their place of residence
- changed job, social circle,
- started to study or first went to work,
- have recently given birth to a child / the composition of the family has changed,

It makes sense that you are stressed. And if you don’t listen carefully to him, don’t help yourself, then you can go pretty far - with outbursts of rage or tears.

3. The reason is in the monotony.

Most often, such a “crazy - I can’t do anything”, with irritation at the ringing of a teaspoon or noisy tea drinkers loved ones are experienced by those who, due to circumstances, feel the need for more diversity.

Routine work, the need to sit “within four walls” with a small child, “forgetting” your needs (even the smallest and most banal - at least once a month to go to the cinema / theater, meet friends) sooner or later leads to “psychos ".

4. Less obvious reason: You have entered a quiet period of life.

It is precisely this reason that is discovered by those who nevertheless reach a psychologist or psychotherapist. As a rule, this period is preceded by very difficult, costly relationships, difficult circumstances and traumatic events.

Once upon a time (or even recently) it was really necessary to “get together and cope”. But this does not mean that your feelings about this have disappeared along with the traumatic events. With a high probability, if you were worried:

A painful divorce, the end of a difficult relationship,
- betrayal of loved ones, business partners,
- rape or attempted violence against you,
- any other events that your psyche “cannot cope with”,

then in a calmer atmosphere, when everything is already behind, previously suppressed and unrecognized feelings rise. This is normal and it goes away, both with the help of a specialist and without it (longer), or with the support of friends and family. Stock up on patience!

5. The reason is in the future.

A person's problem may not be where he expects. Plans, (even for the better!), a potential move to another country, the need to apply to a university or buy an apartment - all this can cause a state of “constantly freaking out” in the present moment.

As a rule, it is enough to admit that what you have to do is really a serious and important, difficult matter. And you are really worried, because you want to do it well, so that everything will work out for you. It is also desirable to somewhat reduce the “heat of passions”, reduce its significance, provide for ways of retreat and various options development of events.

By acknowledging that you are worried “about the future”, you can stop freaking out and constantly worrying about current little things.

Similarly, young mothers can worry about the health and well-being of the child (it’s a good thing), but “take out the brain” of loved ones for a reason and without much reason.

6. The reason is the type of nervous system.

Easily excitable people, as a rule, are already aware of this feature of theirs, and are familiar with the state of “crazy all the time” from early childhood. If this condition has not manifested itself in you, and you have known it for a long time, then it is worth choosing strategies on how to act in different situations if you are “covered” or “carried”.

Mini-instruction for those who often freak out and get nervous

a) Look at your health. Check your thyroid and hormones. Check whether you take care of yourself, whether you sleep on time, whether you eat well, whether you have enough entertainment, whether you observe a banal work and rest schedule. If there are no violations, go to the next paragraph.

b) Think about how long ago the state of “crazy all the time” appeared. If it has been known for a long time, develop strategies on how to be yourself in this world and continue to interact with it. If recently - see further.

c) Take a closer look at your “life line”. Imagine events in one row - the past, the potential future. If you have had serious difficulties and experiences in the past, treat it with respect. It takes time to "psych out" experiences that have been stopped. If a change of circumstances is planned in the future or you want to achieve a big goal - reduce its importance!

How to stop being nervous is a question many people ask themselves when they are in an impasse. After all, it is the excitement that prevents us from taking a sensible look at the problem, weighing all the pros and cons and finding a reasonable way out of the current situation.

I will tell you a secret: there is nothing supernatural and complicated in what I want to tell you today. But this does not mean that everything that I will share with you does not work, on the contrary.

If you make some efforts, if you listen to my recommendations, then you will definitely be able to cope with excitement, stop being nervous and be able to remain calm in any, even hopeless situations. Interesting?

Reasons for our anxiety

Before I tell you about how to stop being nervous and become calm, I want to touch on the topic of the causes of our experiences. Even if you think that all this is unimportant, you are greatly mistaken, because it is not the condition itself that needs to be overcome, but its causes.

Do you know why we are nervous? Yes, because we try our best to think about the past and the future, and do not live for today.

Reason #1

The first reason that causes our anxiety is that we are in a hurry to live.

Yes Yes. We are constantly trying to live in a segment of the future (or rather, in the infinity of the future), without having the knowledge that we will learn later. We imagine an ideal picture of the future (only this and no other), not paying attention to what is happening to us now.

It seems to us that tomorrow that very happy day will come, but for some reason it does not come. First, we are in a hurry to grow up to stop going to school every day, because we think that all the best will happen to us after graduation. The next planned and expected period is marriage, then the purchase of a car, housing, climbing the career ladder, etc.

Let me give you an example of a situation in my life that almost made me worry. There is some event that may happen to me next year. In order for it to take place, it is necessary to plan funding for it this year or pay everything from your own pocket. Although there are still 2 months left until the end of the year, however, planning has already been suspended. When I found out about this, to be honest, I was almost upset, I didn’t start to worry. And then I thought, and I know where I will be in six months, in what country, in what job? Do I need all this then? And where is the guarantee that by entering the event into the “plan”, I will receive money to pay for it?

Have similar situations happened to you? I think they happen every day. We are worried about what decision we will need to make next Thursday, what the dollar will be like next year, where we will go on vacation in the summer. What for?

I really like one joke: “My childhood dream came true - I grew up and I no longer have to get up for school by 8:30. Now I get up for work at 6:20. So are we: we do not appreciate what is, but constantly worry about what will be (or will not be).

Reason #2

The second major cause of our concern is our past.

We constantly think about how we could change our past, we worry about it. Oh why didn't I do this earlier...

Think about it, does it all make sense? After all, the past cannot be changed! All this has already taken place. It just needs to be accepted.

Why do we worry about what drives us to experience this emotion? The most common source of our anxiety is fear. Fear of not doing something, fear that events will not go the way we imagined them. It is fear that is the root cause of anxiety. Well, anxiety makes us agitated and nervous and can even lead to development. Can a person, being in such a state, think sensibly, solve problems, act for his own good? Hardly.

What is the conclusion? Learn to live in the present moment! Don't try to peer into the future or invent a time machine to change the past.

Canadian physician, medical historian and philosopher William Osler once said the wonderful words:

Our main task is not to look into the foggy distance of the future, but to act now, in the direction that we can see.

What else can be added to these golden words?

How to stop being nervous over trifles?

Fence off iron doors past and future. Live in today's pressurized compartments.

Don't think that I'm telling you to do nothing, by no means. It’s just that if you worry about everything that will happen to us in a week, a month or even a year, then you simply can’t have time to prepare for it.

I myself very often live by the principle: "You need to solve problems as they arise." If the problem is only visible somewhere on the horizon and does not affect me, then it is stupid to worry, what if it will bypass me?

A friend of mine jokingly told me this formula for solving life's problems:

50% of problems are solved on their own, 25% are not solved at all, so is it worth worrying about the remaining 25%?

Yes, this is a joke, but if you approach your life from a similar position, then there will be much less unrest, right?

Did you know that stress, constant worries can lead to many serious diseases - to hypertension, heart attack, stroke, diabetes, psoriasis and many others? In pursuit of something ghostly, you can lose not only health, but also life! Stress is a common cause of many mental disorders, including. So if you want to be mentally and somatically a healthy person Don't overlook these simple guidelines.

3 simple steps to help you stop being nervous about everything

Getting rid of anxiety in problem situations is quite simple. The most important thing is to direct your energy not to worry, but to solve the situation. Let me share with you one working trick.

How to stop being nervous for any reason? It's very easy, all you need to do is 3 simple steps towards problem solving:

• Step 1. The first thing you need to do if you are experiencing anxiety is to imagine that the worst can happen if you cannot solve the problem that has arisen.
• Step 2: Once you've imagined the worst that could happen, deal with it as if it's already happened.
• Step 3. Once you've come to terms with the worst case scenario, calmly consider what you can do to improve the situation.

As a rule, we worry precisely because we are afraid that something will go wrong, that the situation will reach a dead end. Okay, but even so. Even if everything will go the worst so, so what? Is it really worth your worries?

Believe me, after you look the danger in the eye, imagine the worst, you will become much easier and calmer. After all, we are worried precisely because emotions prevail over reasonable arguments. And if the outcome of the situation is already known (everything happened), then there will be much less unrest. You can move on to the next important step- to solve the situation, improve the worst option.

Another working way to stop being nervous and worrying

I want to give you one more piece of advice regarding how to calm down and quickly stop being nervous at work, at home or in any other situation. To do this, you must follow a certain algorithm.

If you are overwhelmed with anxiety, ask yourself 4 simple questions:

1. What is bothering me at this moment?
2. What can I do? (What are the options?)
3. What am I going to do now to solve this problem?
4. When do I intend to start taking the intended actions?

If possible, it is best to write or print the answers to all these questions. Firstly, this way you can see the situation and ways out of it more fully, instead of experiencing. Secondly, human memory is not perfect, if something goes wrong, and you refuse the chosen way to solve the problem, you will have other options written down on paper (which you can later forget about).

By answering these questions, you will immediately understand the essence of the problem. Moreover, if you go further, you can imagine possible options way out of the situation, ways to solve the problem and their consequences. You will see what other information you are missing and where to get it from. Believe me, it will be much easier for you to decide on a strategy of action.

Believe me, if you write the answers to all these questions, then you will quickly stop being nervous, and your thoughts will work in a completely different direction - how to constructively get out of this situation.

But even this is not the most important! The most important thing is to clearly imagine when it will be necessary to make a decision, not to rush the situation and, as I wrote above, to solve problems as they arise.

If a decision is required from you in as soon as possible, then after you have collected all necessary information, immediately proceed to action, while trying to discard all worries about the result. After all, you will do everything to improve the worst situation that you have already accepted!

Be busy all the time and you will be calm!

How to stop worrying and winding yourself up? Remember, for this you need to act, you need to keep your brain busy with intense work.

Have you noticed such a pattern that worries arise at those moments when we are free, rest, or our brain is not busy with some kind of hard work? This is where the excitement comes in.

When Winston Churchill was asked if he was worried about the responsibility that lay on him, he said:

I'm too busy to have time to worry.

And, indeed, there was a war, he worked 18 hours a day, and his brain was constantly busy with the decision global problems rather than baseless feelings.

So you, if you are looking for a way out, do not know how to stop worrying, make sure that there is not a minute of free time in your life. Work, develop, devote your time to charity, helping others, then you simply will not have time for useless and destructive worries!

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