Interaction with a female boss. New boss has arrived

Site arrangement 11.10.2019
Site arrangement

Since childhood, many have learned a lesson: it’s good when you are a favorite, and when you are disliked, it’s bad. Mistakes are often forgiven to a beloved child in the family, all whims are fulfilled. The teacher gives hints to the beloved student, and good marks he gets it without difficulty ... And then adulthood begins, but the principle of the pet remains unchanged.

The director at work still has favorite employees and not so much. The former often receive bonuses, they are entrusted with responsible tasks, and there it’s not far from promotion. The latter, as it were, did not go out of their way, remain bad, and they are treated, at least, dismissively. It is precisely such hard workers who have managed to fall into disfavor that advice will come in handy on how to improve relations with the boss and in general in the team.

How to build relationships with your boss

When the word leadership causes only horror, then it is worth considering whether such work is needed at all. It is pointless to build relationships if you are not satisfied wage, nature of activity, busy schedule, inconvenient office location and much more.

If, in general, the working conditions are satisfactory, then you will have to change the tactics of behavior.

Be prepared to forget about your own dislikes, hostility, learn to be a little hypocritical and adapt to the team. The recipe for success consists of the following components: the perfect performance of their duties, individual approach to superiors, exchange of courtesies with colleagues, indispensability.

The boss is a man. Male management style

The atmosphere in the office and relationships in the team largely depend on the leader. It is believed that men and women differ in leadership style. The representatives of the stronger sex are more characterized by the following features:

To get results, men tend to choose coercive tactics. Most effective at the highest levels of management. They are not inclined to pay attention to trifles and relationships in the team.

Chief woman. Features of the female management style

A successful leader always combines feminine and masculine traits. If you look at the situation objectively, the management style largely depends on the temperament, character of the person, gender stereotypes. Classical female leadership strategy is inherent in:

  • relationship orientation;
  • caution;
  • flexibility.

Women are more likely to encourage their subordinates with rewards. They can act intuitively. Evaluation is often guided by personal likes and dislikes.

What style of behavior to choose

In order to build good relationships with superiors and the team as a whole, it is important to develop a tactic of behavior that will satisfy everyone and at the same time not contradict one's own principles.

By resorting to outright flattery, lies, pulling the blanket over yourself, you risk getting ill-wishers. Subsequently, this may turn into the fact that an employee or employee will begin to put spokes in the wheels, substitute at the right time.

How to build relationships

You need to seriously think about this issue from the first working day. The opinion formed in the first weeks will be very difficult to change later. To build a good relationship, heed the following tips:

At the same time, do not forget that the basis of everything - quality work responsible attitude towards it. Try to complete the entire volume on time, if something does not work out, ask for help. Be punctual.

Causes of conflicts

Misunderstandings can happen in any team. But if the employees or the leader are neurotic, then the risk of conflict increases significantly. You can recognize such a person by intemperance, quick and sharp movements, mood swings. There is no need to look for reasons, it will always be found.

Among a relatively close-knit team, tuned to work and adequate, conflicts can arise for the following reasons:

In order for relationships at work to develop well, it is important to learn how to avoid conflicts and resolve them correctly. This is not the place to openly get involved in a war. The ability to stand up for oneself, ambition at any time can turn into a dismissal.

Conflict resolution

In order for relationships with colleagues to be smooth, you need to constantly develop your social skills, learn to communicate with different people. Try to be calm negative traits their colleagues, as a kind of feature. If not, limit communication as much as possible. Work issues can be resolved by phone, internal Internet network.

Respect

Respect is the foundation of any good relationship. It is necessary to respect the work and time of others, opinion, experience and knowledge. There must be subordination at work. It is unacceptable to argue or talk in a boorish way with the leader. A female boss should be perceived as an official, gender stereotypes should be eliminated.

In addition, it is important not to discuss your duties or instructions of the head, but to fulfill them responsibly and unquestioningly. If, in your opinion, the result can be obtained in a more attractive way, the issue should be raised at the planning meeting.

Live up to expectations

In order for the working relationship to please you and others, it is important to handle the entire volume of work in a timely manner. Complete the assigned tasks and prove that you can be relied upon. Try to do your job naturally and easily. This is the first step towards improvement.

Be on the lookout

Feel free to express your point of view, offer new ideas. Hand over reports and papers to management personally.

If the situation is favorable, take advantage of the moment and start communication on interesting topics. For example, such an opportunity may present itself at a corporate party. Try not to miss such events. You should be perceived as a sociable and friendly person.

Praise the boss

Don't think that praise can only come from management. You can also compliment the chef. For example, one can note its ability to find optimal solution, organize the workflow. At sufficient level Dating is normal to praise the taste, clothing style, hairstyle.

Take care of your appearance

Work is a formal place where you need to look appropriate. A strict style of clothing, soft colors, and neatness are welcomed here. If you want to stand out, just use one interesting accessory. Your appearance should not overshadow personal and work qualities. Women should apply moderate daytime makeup, wear skirts and dresses of sufficient length, and do styling. Stockings and tights should be present even in summer, such is the office dress code.

So, how do you improve relationships at work in a team? You need to realize that work relationships require a certain amount of investment, both emotional and physical (just like family or love ones). At first, it can take a lot of energy, very exhausting and devastating. But over time, the efforts will bear fruit, and your reputation will begin to work for you. Communication with colleagues and superiors will become comfortable, you can count on a high assessment of your work, a bonus or promotion.

Stella, Rostov

When you come to work, you want not to be touched and spoil your mood for the next two hours. However, as luck would have it, the boss comes earlier and starts reminding you that your place here is not so high, and you should work harder, more actively and stop helping other employees. And then one day, you got angry and went into the office of another employee to tell that your boss was already tired of his claims. You wanted to do the best, pour out your soul to a true friend, as it seemed to you, and listen to his opinion. But later it turned out that this faithful friend had been friends with the boss for a long time, and therefore, after you left the office, he immediately told the boss about the dialogue. As a result, the claims against you did not stop, but only increased, and the words themselves began to be selected rather unpleasantly. In the evenings, you are now forced to stay in the office and work for three. In a word, the work of Cinderella has become a constant test of strength for you. How do you fix a broken relationship with your boss? Is it possible to implement this at all or will you have to hang out at work all the time while the rest are celebrating happy dates and dedicate themselves to the family?

The first thing to start with is to agree that the fault belongs to you. If you think that everything said between you and the boss is the wrong behavior of the second, then you can skip step number two. It is useless to argue with the one who hired you, you should always agree with his words and not make them public. Otherwise, you will have to sit here now and read this article, gnawing at your elbows. Realizing that the relationship was ruined through your fault, think about how you can talk to your boss so that no one else knows about the conversation. If you enter the office and start to say from the threshold that you have admitted your guilt, and at this time other employees will continue to do their work in the field or decide to temporarily take a break, then the boss will not be ready to receive you and will expose you not to a very beautiful light in front of colleagues. You will become broken, tired, nervous and say even more unnecessary things. So choose a time or day that is most convenient for you to talk to your boss, settling the quarrel and repairing the damaged relationship.

Step number three, do not bring alcohol, food or money to his office. Relationships won't work for sure. He will think that this is simply a bribe and, perhaps, in the future he will try to ruin relations with you and other employees again so that they, like you, bring him gifts. Would you like this outcome? Probably not much. Therefore, going to go to the office to the boss. Better dress up to look like a smart and loyal employee.

Step number four - prepare mentally. If your friend offers a drink for courage, refuse. It is unlikely that the boss will be pleased to smell the aroma of alcohol from the lips of someone who came to confess his guilt. Firstly, you will demonstrate your lack of culture, and secondly, spoil your relationship even more, since this is simply disrespect for your seniors, and you can also get a fine for drinking alcohol in work time and in the workplace. This situation will lead to consequences, as in one work "The Overcoat". That is, you will have to suffer for a long time and think about how to fix a damaged relationship with your boss, then find out that you are forgiven, but not believe in it, and in the end, go crazy, or even worse. In order not to do something stupid, it is important to concentrate, mentally think through everything that you will say to your boss and not get confused. When you enter the office, behave civilly: close the door behind you, do not speak first, and also do not sit in a chair. After all, now you are not a guest, but a person who is guilty of the fact that the boss no longer trusts you and does not feel like helping in the future.

When your boss asks a question where “what did you want?” is contained, then start with the most important thing - immediately say that you would like to admit your guilt and ask for forgiveness. No need to beg for forgiveness, fall to your knees and show tears. All this does not affect the authorities, but only angers and forces them to sign an application for the removal of the employee from the position he occupies on this moment. Best of all, sit down in a chair, look your boss in the eyes and boldly say that you understand your mistakes and are ready to correct and prevent them in the future. Say that you value communication and collaboration, that you would not want to lose such an interesting and good man. It does not matter who is at the head of this or that institution, it is important that he is accustomed to being aware of himself as the central one, and therefore to hold all the power and authority in his hands. You are a subordinate and, therefore, you must understand that you do not need to argue with your boss and trust every employee, even if you have known each other for a long time. In order to get a higher position, they are ready to do anything, even betrayal. So, be confident in yourself and remember that if you make a mistake, you need to quickly correct it and ask for forgiveness from the one you offended.

» Bad bosses-2

Dealing with a Difficult Leader
(Methods of confronting tyrant bosses)

Knowledge different types"difficult" bosses, being able to identify and deal with them can help you build healthier and more productive relationships with your immediate bosses. The types of "difficult bosses" are described below, as well as some recommendations for the correct construction of a strategy for the behavior of their subordinates.

First of all, "difficult" leaders share a few common characteristics. Firstly, even if you personally did not have a relationship with your boss, this does not mean that your boss is from the “difficult” category. Maybe you just don't get along. The fact that the "boss is an asshole" should be firmly convinced not only by you, but also by the majority of employees subordinate to him. Secondly: such bosses are very constant in their "difficult" behavior. They have a rigidly fixed style - this is their original "set of kookies", unique distinguishing features that they use to control others. Such chefs are literally obsessed with their style of behavior. Therefore, their subordinates know in advance what they are going to do - even before they do it. Thirdly: communication with such leaders takes a lot of strength and nerves from their employees. Fourth, the energy expended by employees in dealing with them usually does not correspond to the importance of the problem being considered. And finally, any of these bosses can be either male or female.

Types of "difficult" leaders .

1. "Mafiosi" ("bull")- a classic character in jokes and gangster television series. It looks like a boxer, wrestler or criminal. A shaved head or a short haircut, a “bull neck”, “a golden chain on that oak ...” I was not tortured by education - a vocational school or a technical school. Likes simple types of business that do not require a large number cerebral convolutions (market, gas station, car service, parking lot). Specific primitive speech with large quantity words not translated into foreign languages. He drinks a lot (expensive cognac, whiskey, vodka), smokes, sometimes uses drugs. He drives a jeep, lives in a mansion or a cottage, loves gambling. He likes to "relax" on vacation abroad or "with girls" in an expensive nightclub. He likes to speak loudly on a cell phone on the beach: “Well, I have everything under control there, I have three companies, I put young guys with diplomas as directors, I bought a tax office ...”. Usually optional in negotiations and business contacts, deceives when he is confident in the "roof". In work with the personnel there is a complete "chaos" and low wages. Divides people into those who are stronger and weaker than him. He is afraid of the first and despises the second. Disdain for all who are weaker than him, who agree with him and yield to him, is a characteristic feature of such a person. Often feels the desire to publicly humiliate, suppress his subordinates. Feels the greater anger and desire to humiliate, the more helpless and weak the victim looks.

2. "New Russian"- v last years he greatly pressed the previous type of bosses. Most often young, about 30 years old, educated, very rich. The origin of the fortune is not advertised, most often financial fraud with the bank or the use of budget funds. Higher education - economic, legal, sometimes technical. He does not suffer from deep spiritual anguish. No problems with public morals or corporate ethics. Ready to "walk over corpses" without hesitation. Deeply despises all who are below him on the social ladder, but outwardly observes the limits of decency. An introvert (closed personality), in communication with subordinates usually does not show emotions. Looks in a conversation to the side or through a person. If the topic or interlocutors are not interesting to him, then he is ready to end the conversation in 3-5 minutes (“hard style”). He is always well dressed, maintains excellent physical shape, does not drink alcohol or in small quantities, interest in women (men) is moderate. Prefers to hire highly qualified personnel (lawyer, accountant, manager). It pays very well, but in the case of "punctures" - kicks out without hesitation.

3. "Authority"- an imperious, strong leader of an authoritarian style, does not tolerate objections. This is the image of a “red director”, a traditional Soviet leader: strict, solid, experienced, responsible and knowledgeable of the “real economy of the country”. His formation as a leader was connected with party and economic work. Therefore, I got used to servility and hierarchy. Subordinates who do not want to look at him "from the bottom up" cause an aggressive reaction, because they break his ideas about what should be. Lives by the proverb "the boss is always right." Can quickly fire a recalcitrant, even his closest assistant. In general, he is reluctant to let people who are not part of his inner circle come close to him.

Outwardly, he seems to be a rustic and even masculine person, not inclined to reflection. But this is not always the case. He drinks a lot, likes to eat well and the company of women after work. It has an extraordinary will and powerful energy. The need for power and control over people is highly developed. Referring to subordinates as “you” (an old habit of Soviet and party leaders) From subordinates, he expects not so much approval and admiration for his person as unquestioning execution of orders

In communication with subordinates, he is cruel, but open and ready to listen to arguments expressed in the proper form. Quickly makes decisions that are not always justified and fair, “cuts off the shoulder”. V modern business poorly mastered - this is a disappearing type of leader. Sooner or later, it loses in competition to the “new Russians”. With his departure from the enterprise, an entire era ends, and this is always painful, but he is remembered in the team as a good “red director”.

4. "Napoleon"- usually (but not always) small in stature, nondescript appearance, a lot of complexes. The level of intelligence is most often average (“there are not enough stars from the sky”). Strive for power to heal their psychological trauma. Since childhood, I felt my inferiority: the girls did not pay attention, the guys beat, the adults humiliated, I had to constantly catch up with the “lucky ones”. Over time, the desire to overcome his shortcomings acquired the character of hypercompensation, prompting him to develop and improve himself. He took it with diligence, diligence and diligence (“ass”). Very vain, with difficulty made his way to the bosses. More than anything else, he is afraid of losing his position and status. Disciplined, smart, organizer by nature, introvert. Behavior in the team - "from rags to riches." He loves himself and his accomplishments. He is vindictive until the end of his life, touchy, does not forgive jokes and criticism, prefers flattery, loves when his merits, office, work and achievements are praised.

5. "Important Bird" or "cheek puffer" - a fairly common type of middle manager who has recently made it to the top. Likes to play the "bird" high flight". He puts on a mysterious look, making it clear to others and subordinates that he knows a lot and can, that he has a “hand everywhere” (mayor, governor, the president himself). In fact, this leader got into the bosses solely by chance. Abilities are mediocre: intuitive personality type, low or average intelligence, bad memory and analytical skills, arrogant. Focused on personal and family needs, he never forgets himself, but he does not steal on a large scale, he does not take large bribes - he is afraid to lose his position forever. In the work team, he prefers weak subordinates, conflicts, "slander" and flattery. Such a hero was perfectly played by Igor Ilyinsky in the film "Volga-Volga".

6. "Organizer" ("Enthusiast"). Constantly on the move, extremely sociable (choleric), prefers to quickly solve operational problems to the detriment of strategic ones, he is distinguished by high level intellect. More often it is chubby, bald, plump. The external image of a benevolent, lively, enthusiastic interlocutor, Can quickly organize the implementation of any business and mobilize labor collective to achieve the goal. However, he is able to bring his subordinates to quiet madness with his idiotic undertakings and "valuable" initiatives. Therefore, the first leaders rarely leave the "organizer" - most often he gets to the chief engineer, deputy in economics or personnel. The office and the desktop are always littered with papers, documents, newspapers, the secretary does not trust them to sort them out, she orientates herself thanks to her excellent memory and the “grasp of a social activist”.

7. "Smart Fox"- outwardly always smiling, pleasant person. Got a good education, a comprehensively developed personality, necessarily has a hobby (draws, composes poetry, numismatist, plays music), a creative personality type, choleric or phlegmatic, focused on the surrounding reality, quickly responds to changes in the environment, usually has no problems with morality, avoids conflicts. He has a firm authority of an important person with a top leader, they come to him for advice. From such managers come the main specialists (chief accountant, chief legal adviser, chief technologist, personnel assistant). V operational work with him it is important to document the course of negotiations, endorse documents (he does not like this), draw up minutes of meetings and reach agreement. Without this, he may withdraw from the agreement. In a team, he prefers silence and minor conflicts, does not like authoritarianism, but is forced to obey his superior.

8. "Eminence grise"- a very strong personality in a team, prefers to be “in the shadows” and on the sidelines with a young or old leader, usually aged 50 years and older, suffered serious illness which is always in it. He has a brilliant education, a very high intellect, an excellent memory and a huge production or personnel experience. Outwardly ascetic in appearance, thin, gloomy, introvert, nothing can be read from his face, a widower or unhappy in family life. He does not take gifts and bribes, does not make decisions himself, likes to prepare decisions and implement them through top management (“Your idea”), a good diplomat, and respects the interests of the enterprise or organization. Historical images: Cardinal Richelieu and member of the Politburo of the Central Committee of the CPSU M. A. Suslov.

9. "Bully" loud, staunch, firm, formidable, aggressive, and they say about him that he has influential friends in high places (often the "bully" does it himself). Bullies have a strong desire to control others; for them, life is an ongoing struggle for power.

Bullies are afraid of two things: their own imperfection and any form of intimacy. When dealing with this type of leader, stand straight, look and speak openly, call him by name to get his attention, but without taking a "fighting stance", and try to solve the problem that interests you with him. Try to control your own fear, as fear only incites ("turns on") this type of leader. Don't show your excitement and give the "bully" time to vent his anger.

When the bully's momentum begins to wane, it's your turn to take the lead. Avoid "any collision". Be friendly but firm. Smile if it seems appropriate, but don't be intimidated. Focus on the problem and your needs. If you show respect, not fear, the "bully" will look for another "victim".

10. "Bear" usually friendly, sweet and benevolent. However, such leaders have two main drawbacks: they delay decisions at all costs and make do with general statements, avoiding being specific. Slow managers are in fact the victims of a demanding, pedantic upbringing; they procrastinate on tasks to avoid trouble, "beat around the bush", avoiding being frank and afraid of hurting someone's feelings.

Slow managers are afraid of making a mistake that may reveal their professional incompetence and blunders. If your leader is slow, try to discover this in a "hidden barrier" situation. Be sure to let him know that it is not surprising to make mistakes when you are learning something. Ask what he means when he uses vague or ambiguous words, and agree on precise and realistic deadlines for completing the work. Be flexible, but be factual. Use positive techniques and avoid pressure: a slow leader is already insecure enough. Try to solve problems with the alternatives arranged in a row. Give support to the manager after he has made a decision. When he makes a decision, increase your vigilance; accepting orders and instructions from him, do not rush things.

11. "Fighter"(for women "Amazon"). "Fighter" is a "walking bomb" with a clockwork. His (or her) anger is not on the surface. The “fighter” explodes unexpectedly: he screams a lot, attacks and splashes out his sarcasm. He likes to "shoot" indiscriminately, quickly and often. When his outburst ends, he "creeps" back into his sullen silence. For the "fighter" the restoration of justice (real or imagined) is the goal, vengeance is the tool.

The "fighter" is afraid of his own anger and the manifestation of his emotions, as well as insincerity in any form. When you approach this type of leader, try to confront them constructively. You can even tell him how difficult it is to deal with his "half wind" anger. Ask for a personal meeting with him; do not allow deviations or disruptions. Then show your serious intentions by focusing on the question; try to channel his energy into solving the problem. Make it a challenge for him, because he likes challenges.

12. "Flatterer" constantly smiling, friendly, obsequious, with a sense of humor. Flatterers tell people what they want to hear; trying to "pin them against the wall" is as ineffectual as trying to collect mercury with a fork. Flatterers believe more in form and influence than in essence and competence. Their need for approval makes them experts in trickery.

The "flatterer" is afraid of direct conversation and direct action, which sometimes leads to the generation of enemies. He needs approval - so give it to him, laugh at his jokes and enjoy his stories. But don't let him make unrealistic commitments. Hold him accountable and demand facts: names, location, specific task and confirmation of truth. Let him know that honesty is the best policy.

13. "Know-It-All" knows a lot, but his problem is that he acts like he knows everything. He (or she) is very impatient, which manifests itself in an inability to listen. If the “know-it-all” encounters negative phenomena, he criticizes what he himself does not know, blames others, since he himself needs little prompting and does not like to work in groups. The know-it-all thinks that his own mind and knowledge is the only way to evaluate the performance of other people's work.

The know-it-all is afraid of not pleasing others, afraid of a sharp drop in his own standards of excellence. Don't fight the know-it-all, don't blame him, and avoid confrontation with him; don't try to be "counter-expert" (oppose him in what he considers himself an expert). On the contrary, lead him to solve the problem. Ask the "know-it-all", listen to him and express gratitude to him; then provide feedback and suggest alternatives.

14. "Lazy" (slob). The personal habits (inclinations) of a “lazy person” can irritate and even cause disgust; disorder and chaos manifests itself both in his (or her) work and in his personal life. “Lazy people” cannot navigate in the order of things and prioritize tasks; their clothes are constantly wrinkled, soiled or torn. They may eat too much, smoke, smell of alcohol, or leave half their dinner on their own mustaches.

"Lazy" does not want to admit that he should be responsible for his actions, showing childishness and carelessness. If you're working with a lazy person, support him when he accidentally shows neatness in his behavior and help him achieve more order in his personal and professional life. Show on own example that if you behave the same way as him, then the matter will stop. Try to instill minimal knowledge of the leader's NOT. "Lazy" requires a hardworking and clear secretary who can solve problems.

15. "Abnormal" ("Concerned"). Such a leader exhibits abnormal (deviating from the norm) behavior. Abnormality affects either sexual harassment, or frequent absenteeism, or constant lies. The "abnormal" leaders try to shirk responsibility and hope that people will "cover" them. They are too anxious, ineffective, and it is difficult to understand whether this excitement and irrepressible whims are the cause or effect of their own problems. His behavior quickly manifests itself in business trips, because he gets drunk more often, is rude, sticks to women, scandals.

An “abnormal” leader is afraid of responsibility and, perhaps, behaves inappropriately even when he achieves success. His anomalies should be carefully documented to provide "reliable evidence" for victory in case he tries to lie to protect himself. Some employees should have their own dossiers on the manager's anomalous activities; such documents can provide convincing proof of their case in the event of a confrontation.

Technology for dealing with a "difficult" leader

When dealing with a "difficult" manager, you can choose from several acceptable options. The most effective strategy is determined by the type of "difficult" leader you have and your own specific personality and management skills. Below are the behaviors from which you can choose the best.

Don't do anything. Just keep doing what you've been doing all along. Of course, this has already led to the current situation and does not promise anything good. But if your fear of trying your luck is greater than your degree of dissatisfaction, perhaps the best thing to do is to let things take their course, for any other course might just add fuel to the fire.

Reevaluate your leader. Individual leaders are not really "difficult." Some employees think they have "difficult" leaders, but in reality they just have different ideas about their roles, goals, or values. Or it may turn out that the point is in the contradiction (incompatibility) of individuals - such, for example, as an extrovert (a person who is interested only in external objects) and an introvert (a person focused on his experiences); or the problem is conflicting perspectives - such as the detail-oriented and opposite "whole picture" perspectives. The meaning of these differences depends on how you look at them and how you use them; a combination of people with a "big picture" perspective and a detailed perspective can give a great command, but it can also lead to confrontation. Review, reevaluate your leader.

Refine your style. Sometimes the best approach is to forget about the desire to change the leader and improve your own behavior. Of course, you must have the desire to change, otherwise the attempt will fail. If you decide to change, try to make just one or two meaningful and important changes in your approach to work. Change what directly hinders the effectiveness of your relationship with your boss.

Talk to your supervisor. First of all, you need to evaluate how good a candidate for a one-on-one dialogue is your manager. Some executives just don't practice this kind interpersonal communication, in which case you'd better give up on this attempt. Is your manager able to take criticism? Is he (or she) a caring person? Can he (or she) listen? If your manager is a good candidate for dialogue, then ask him for a meeting, prepare carefully for it; ask meaningful questions and observe his reactions; at the same time, use feedback, expressing your approval in cases where you deem it necessary. Remember that most leaders crave genuine, thoughtful feedback to ease the burden that their difficult behavior creates. If your "difficult" boss has a "difficult" boss, then your boss may need that support even more than you do. Give him a good example.

"Talk Anonymously". If you are afraid to tell your boss what you think directly, you can try to communicate your thoughts to him with a tactful, attentive, but still honest letter. A bulletin board message about the establishment of the "difficult manager of the month" award may have some effect, but don't try this approach in a small firm! Sometimes an anonymous message is the only acceptable opportunity to get attention. However, don't get caught red-handed.

Select transfer (by service). If you like your organization but don't like your manager, getting a transfer may be your best alternative. Pick the type of leader you would like to have and decide what type of work you would like to do for him. Make a list of a few executives you would like to work with, and directly or indirectly "cast the bait" to the best candidate. Your current manager should only know what you are doing if you are confident that you can successfully complete the transfer attempt.

Approach a senior manager. This strategy is risky, but it can be effective. Remember that there is a strong possibility that the "big boss" might side with your boss. As you know, a raven will not peck out a crow's eye. Try to determine how close they are, and beware if your leader belongs to his (or her) clan. If you really choose this approach, be sure to prepare solid arguments. Be objective and helpful, but don't "sell out" your manager.

Cope with a "difficult" boss. If none of these strategies appeals to you, there can be only one way out - you must be able to "tame" your leader! If you meet some of his (or her) needs, he (or she) will usually try not to lose you. But whatever you do, don't sacrifice your own values ​​- it's not worth losing your respect for yourself. Look at the people who get along with this leader and learn how they do it. For example, they take on responsibilities that the manager does not like to deal with, or do not require his approval when it is not required, or remain silent when the leader is indignant.

Change organization. A change of scenery can often work wonders. But there is no guarantee that a leader in another organization will be better than your current one. However, if you are in a small organization associated with a leader who is not good for you, it may be time to look around and think about changing jobs. Evaluate your choice very carefully. new organization and a new manager before you leave your current job.

The section uses materials from the book by G.V. Shchekina How to effectively manage people. Psychology personnel management"- Kiev.: 1996. - S. 334-346.

The section uses materials from the book by A.P. Egorshin "Personnel management". - Novgorod, 2001. - S. 400-410.

Continuing the topic:

FinExecutive Russia site 2019-03-18

The secret of success or how to build effective relationship with the leader

Properly built relationships with management can be an excellent support for your career advancement. It would seem that this is difficult? After all, communication at work primarily depends on ourselves.

There are many articles devoted to this topic. Their authors unanimously agree that one must be competent in their field, be able to cope with the tasks set on time and become a team player. But is it really that simple? How to develop an effective strategy and learn how to avoid sharp corners.

Your leader is, first of all, a person with his own feelings, priorities and values. So, in most cases, with him it is quite possible to find mutual language. What is needed for this?

5 valuable advice how to build relationships with management

  1. Look for points of contact. Most likely, your boss's interests are not limited to work. Perhaps he has hobbies that are close to you. Just don't try to cheat. If the leader is an avid mushroom picker, and you can hardly distinguish fly agaric from champignon, find another topic for dialogue.
  2. Remember subordination. Whatever your relationship, do not forget that the leader should have the last word. If you are sure that your idea will benefit the company, defend your point of view with arguments. Keep pace and stay correct. Even if they refuse you, do not rush to write a letter of resignation. After all, the responsibility for the decisions made (or not taken) always falls on the shoulders of the boss.
  3. Criticism is taboo. Criticism is one of the most serious mistakes of a subordinate. Even if you have something to say, resist the temptation to get involved in discussions about leadership behavior. Indeed, among the interlocutors there may be a “friend”, who will soon retell everything in detail to the boss. And it is not known in what form, with what colorful turns this information will be presented.
  4. Take on the experience. This is a great way to improve your professionalism. After all, it was these methods that allowed the boss to achieve success. Therefore, analyze the course of his thoughts, methods of work, what technologies he prefers. It is possible that soon your personal productivity will increase significantly.
  5. Calculate the development of the situation. When you are given a task to find out information or analyze the received numbers, think about what else management might need along the way. Foresight, possession of information testify to your professionalism.

What to do when things don't go so smoothly?

Unfortunately, in practice the situation is not always favorable. There can be many reasons for this. After all, each of us has his own character, communication experience, rhythm, familiar techniques that we acquire at the previous place of work.

Maybe you are used to performing tasks with high quality and thoughtfully, and now you are expected to have a lightning-fast reaction and an instant report on the work done. Or a new boss seeks to control you at all stages of the task, and you are used to planning your actions on your own and only showing the final result by the specified deadline.

In any case, negative emotions unbalance and interfere with fruitful work. Sometimes, in order to understand the cause of disagreements and eliminate them, it is enough to analyze what situations annoy the leader, listen to his opinion and try to make adjustments to his behavior.

Observing colleagues can be helpful. If only you experience difficulties in communication, and the rest manage to find a common language with the boss, then the cause of the troubles definitely lies in you. Ask if someone in the team has already been in your place. Then it makes sense to talk to this person and take advantage of his experience.

If, despite your best efforts, productive cooperation is not achieved, try to find the right time to talk with your manager in private. Correctly ask what your actions he considers wrong. Ask for his opinion on how to fix it and take into account the answer. After all, your future career may depend on how well you know how to listen.

In this situation, it is important to be able to choose the right time for a conversation and demeanor. When an audit is on the verge or deadlines for submitting an important report are burning, management will hardly be in the mood for dialogue. And the question "Why are you yelling at me?" won't help you make contact. It is much more constructive to formulate the phrase like this: “What is my mistake?” At the same time, demonstrate a desire to make an effort to correct it.

Remember - a frank conversation with the boss has saved more than one career.

Relationships with superiors are a painful topic for many subordinates. You can’t please him in any way - he constantly shouts, pronounces, makes comments. Of course, the situations are different and in some cases the relationship takes on a friendly character from the very first days of work. But what to do if in your case not everything is so rosy and disagreements arise every day? Step by step to conquer the strict temper of your boss.

Ten Steps to a Good Relationship with Your Boss

These ten steps will help you understand what you are doing wrong and find an approach to the most severe boss. After all, your boss is also a person and he has his weaknesses.

Step one. Find a reason to respect

Everyone will agree that showing respect if there is none is hypocrisy at best. This method is contrary to the moral principles of many people. So what to do? And you think, is your boss really not worthy of respect at all? For what merits, then, was he put in charge of the organization? Perhaps he is a real professional or he has excellent business qualities. Analyze everything that you have seen and heard during the work. There must be a reason for respect. And it is much easier to get along with a person whom you really respect.

Step two. Live up to expectations

Perhaps the problem is that you don't live up to your boss's expectations? Listen to his requirements, think about what you most often had to get under a hot hand. Start taking care of yourself - improve your professionalism, never let your boss down by delaying reports or not fulfilling your direct duties, always come to work on time, respect your lunch break. The boss will definitely put a plus sign in his notebook for such an employee.

Step three. Get the news right

Your boss should only get good news from you, so stick to simple rule- even the worst news should be presented as neutral. And if she's really good, how great. If your boss associates you with receiving good news, he will remember you as an excellent employee.

Step four. Participate in community activities

Don't limit yourself to work duties - actively participate in the life of the company. Volunteer to hold promotions, express your thoughts on improving the quality of work, go to meetings and corporate meetings. Whenever possible, set others as an example of your boss, pointing out his professionalism. Your vigorous activity will not go unnoticed.

Step five. A little bit of flattery

If your boss managed to pull off a good deal or launch new project, then be sure to pay attention to this and do not fail to say a few words of praise. No need for open flattery and praise for the qualities of the boss - it will sound like you are sucking up to him. A few words spoken in a kind, calm tone will suffice. The boss is also a person and any praise is pleasant to him.

Step six. Don't gossip

Never discuss your boss with colleagues. And if it really happened, then say only good things about him, refuting all the ridiculous rumors. There are no secrets in the team - every bad word you said about the boss will definitely reach his ears, and then you can forget about the world, and even more so the promotion.

Step seven. Don't Ignore Organization Rules

Every organization has its own rules and regulations - never break them. For example, if you have a dress code, then it must be followed. Come to work like a holiday - in an ironed suit, with an impeccable haircut. Behave confidently - this is an additional plus in your address.

Step eight. Do not overload the boss with unnecessary questions

Do not go to the boss with empty questions and personal requests during periods of emergency. If something is not clear to you, then perhaps someone from more experienced colleagues than you can help you. If you need to clarify something with the boss, then catch a moment when he will be in good location spirit.

Step nine. Don't show that it's hard for you

Even if you have a lot of work, and you are forced to stay at work longer than the allotted time, never give the appearance that it is difficult for you or that something does not suit you. The boss should see that you are doing an excellent job, showing a zeal for work. These are very valuable qualities for an employee.

Step ten. Get in touch with your boss

Understand that the desire to see another person in the place of your boss will not lead to anything. Since you came here to work, you do not have to choose your bosses. The only way out is to look for dignity in the one that is.


Do you think that you do not need it and that it is easier to change jobs? And where is the guarantee that the boss will be better in another position? And by showing initiative, professionalism and zeal to work in this place, you can achieve not only the favor of the boss, but also an increase in the career ladder.

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