"The woman is created for a man, not a man for a woman" - such a postulate ...
The emotional background is an assistant in establishing contact between people, thanks to him, a person is able to see the reaction of his interlocutor, as a result of which it becomes easier to find a common language. Nevertheless, it is not always possible for us to advertise your emotions. In general, it is worth noting that the ability to control their emotions is a gift that can be obtained from nature or developed throughout life. You can develop it by examining the secret of excerpts and learning this art.
How to control emotions
Throughout the life, we enter into many contacts, we get into different situations and, as D. Carnegie says, it must be remembered that "we communicate with illogical creatures, with the creations of emotional, crushing prickly prejudices and moving pride and vanity." The ability to control your emotions helps us to lavaling and build relationships with people.
The surrounding reality does not really contribute to the hop of our weaknesses, inability to communicate, our ability to worry about the most insignificant reasons. We are constantly being "mental attacks", we fall into stressful situations and, without knowing how to restore our mental balance, we deviate more and more with the point of optimal state. There are a feeling of anxiety, discomfort. Evaluation of situations under the influence of neuro-emotional excitation becomes inadequate.
Fear, anger and other negative emotions cause a strong muscle tension ("face with a convulsion", "nervous breathing", "hands squeezed in fists", etc.)
A person at such minutes is a self-exciting system, in which muscle tension, rapid heartbeat, "rapid breathing" are additional signals entering the brain and supporting emotional arousal.
On the other hand, a relaxed state, even breathing are signs of calm, positive emotional state, equilibrium. "Calm down, take yourself in hand!" - We hear advice from friends or talk it to themselves, perfectly recognizing that it is a little efficient means.
To control your emotions and not nervous, you need to try differently. Relaiming the muscles of the body, cut off the influx of exciting signals into the central nervous system. To smile - and send a powerful impulse from the face of the face into the brain muscles associated with a pleasant emotional state.
The relationship between the psyche and the tone of musculature allows, affecting words or images to involuntary functions, cause in the muscles and conditions of the state that correspond to emotional peace, rest, stabilizing all organism systems.
In a state of deep muscle relaxation (relaxation), a person can relax deeply and quickly, reduce nervous emotional tension, use reserves of its body, to activate its physiological functions, purposefully affect their identity. Muscular relaxation is the basis of autotraining.
The ability to manage its emotions is an excellent sign of self-control. Only balanced and confident man can keep their emotions under control. Very often you have to simulate emotions, depicting the joy of the meeting or show full indifference in those situations when there is no calm on the shower. In fact, this is a rather difficult lesson, it should be understood that the manifestation of cold and some indifference bears the need for a delay inside of strong emotions. As a result, a person in the future need to make an emotional splash, since, holding emotions, you can come to get neurosis.
But it is worth understanding that the ability to control emotions is necessary only in some situations - then the emergence of conflict situations, working moments and some others.
Emotionality is a great weapon. Thanks to the proper use of emotions, such as: delight, playfulness, interest - can be placed in mind. When using some antipodes, the above variations of emotions are capable of expressing its uncroligible.
Emotions can be expressed in the form of several forms: expressive movements, emotional actions, personal attitude to the surrounding reality, a statement about the emotional states.
Mimica plays a huge role in building emotions. It is she who can reflect on our face and is able to sometimes distinguish our thoughts and desires. Having learned to control your thoughts, you can achieve full control of emotions.
The voice is the following variety of emotions, which is displayed during the intonation invested in the words said. In combination with faith, gestures, voice features can give a conversation to a particular character, which, under the power of each person, to define independently. It is unacceptable to give emotions to edit you, learn how to manage them, so you can always control emotions and any situation.
The dynamic life of modern society is that and the case brings us to the "redistribution" of their own emotions. It's no secret that today almost everyone faces the need for emotional discharge. If this does not happen, then emotions are only enhanced, and then a person, not knowing how to overcome its emotions, breaks down on loved ones and relatives, even worse if the emotional tension provokes the disease.
So, because to get into yourself and accumulate your emotions - yourself worse, how do they control and overcome them?
Find a way to throw out emotions. Spread, if in such a way you easier to overcome the voltage.
Discuss your problems and pour your soul to your loved ones.
If there is no one in proximity, then tell us about your problems yourself by reflection in the mirror. Such a story in some way can even more efficiently dialogue, because it will help you in more detail to study the reasons for your emotional tension and get rid of them.
Put a personal diary, such a way to control and manage your emotions is also very effective, writing everything happens to you, you get the opportunity after some time, without unnecessary emotions, analyze the causes and consequences of your condition.
Sometimes let yourself be a little child - shawit and frolic as in childhood, such a way "guys" is often used in psychotherapy to achieve carelessness and confidence.
Use self-suggestion, repeating the phrases "I am calm", "Around me peace", "I am already easier" and the like mantras to control your emotions.
Anger is one of the most powerful human emotions and if you learn to control it, the rest of the emotions will "give up without a fight" before such an excerpt!
Before expressing in the face of a person, those or other accusations or reproaches, stop and slowly take up to ten. Initially, it will be difficult for you to do this, but very soon this technique will help you keep your emotions under control. It is not about "to hide offense" or "save the resentment in yourself." The fact is that most often we are angry in trifles and after some time I regret the quarrel. Is it not better to wisely to give a person the right to an error?
Be indulgent to loved people. Sometimes keeping anger and soberly assess the situation helps the idea that you are the most serious, smart, elder, and are responsible for those who are younger and unreasonable.
Do not disseminate your mood on others. As a rule, they are absolutely not to blame for the fact that you have some problems. Therefore, if you have trouble at work, then, coming home, you must completely abstract from them, and do not recoup on your relatives who have come to you with any question or request.
Remember that if you can't come up with how to control your emotions, and still talk to an extra close person, this unpleasant incident can play against you in the future, for example, when you need support and helping relatives and Friends. In addition, you will always have an unpleasant precipitate from what happened, since the human memory has a property to reliably fix the nervous, stressful situations.
Do not expect from surrounding sympathy and empathy. Remember that, in most cases, people seem insignificant problems of others. Be prepared for the fact that you, with the best holding circumstances, simply listen, and do not be surprised if you disappear from you, referring to employment. It is unlikely that such behavior of others can be called a sufficient reason for the hysteria. But the word abandoned, the word can forever spoil your relationship with someone from loved ones.
Remember that, angry, you, first of all, destroy yourself, and the flow of your angry emotions - and the person who are addressed. Take care of yourself and others, and try to resolve all conflicts that have arisen only when you stay in the great location of the Spirit.
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In the question "How to learn to control the emotions" sounds. Learn how many people want to control emotions. After all, a balanced and discreet person is perceived as reliable, smart, serious. Too emotional people frighten others, and there is no difference what emotion is shivering: or whether a person cries overwrite, or whether he laughs in all.
Before you start working on yourself, you need get rid of from the existing one stereotype The fact that emotions are something light, minor, something that is obliged to quickly subjugate the mind.
People often say others: "Calm down! Now stop nervous! You can't take yourself in your hands? ", But when they comes to worry, they simply do not know where to do themselves.
Emotions control people and people very angry when it is impossible to manage emotions, since underestimate Their strength and value.
Why it is not worth angry when emotions manage and send, you can understand, learning what emotions are generally. We recommend that you read the article to learn more about the nature and functional significance of emotions.
Emotionsit's not just some mental processes and states, it is a complex psychophysiological internal regulation mechanism mental activity and behavior aimed at meeting the urgent needs of a person. Roughly speaking, emotions help a person to survive. Both bad and good emotions vital People, they regulate the behavior, directing a person to the side to achieving and preserving well-being and from trouble.
Emotion - social necessity. This is although it is difficult, but perhaps and often just need a cultural, civilized person.
Control over emotions is ...
Emotions frame-out Normal manifestation, no longer serve for the benefit of man, they provoke diseases (including mental), spoil relations with others, make it difficult to self-realization in different spheres of life, change the person (person becomes impulsive, irritable, aggressive and the like).
Excessively long and intensive emotions, especially negative, can make a person unhappy and significantly spoil life. It is known, for example, that in a state of affect, an individual may even commit a crime.
Emotions control complicated, and their extreme intensive and braking all other mental form processes as affects are generally impossible. The stronger the emotion, the more efforts it will be necessary for its curb. Therefore, much easier do not bring Emotion to the state of excessive and too long, learn yourself to control.
No matter how difficult, but still a huge number of people know how to regulate their emotional state. Masterfully make actors, politicians, lawyers, military - many people know how to keep themselves in their hands.
Control emotions This is not the same thing to suppress them or ignore! Control of emotions implies:
- skill realize, that is, catch yourself at the thoughts about the emergence of emotions and understand how specifically is called one or another experienced emotion,
- skill accept and bad and good emotions and understand their functional significance, the need for the body and personality,
- skill them to manage, that is, support normal Intensity and duration of experiences.
Control over emotions This is the management of them to the extent that this is possible when they have already arisen, as well as the ability to prevent the undesirable development of strong, excessive, dangerous emotions.
How to learn to control emotions for 5 steps
Emotions a lot and each of them requires separate consideration. It is easy to guess that the mechanism of containing laughter and fear will be different. But still there are some universal recommendationsThese are psychologists:
Small secret: To relax squeezed muscles, they need to strain even more. It is necessary to press even more, squeeze, surpassed, twisted the region, after which there will be automatic relaxation of this muscle group. If it is impossible to make such a mini-massage, then you need to try at least a bit of cake, the muscles of the face will relax so.
So, the essence of control over emotions In the skill:
- aware of them and their bodily expression,
- effort will manage their intensity,
- it is reasonable to regulate your behavior, not denying the presence of emotions.
Any emotion is a hint, signal to action. You need to listen to it.
Most people want to learn to control precisely negative emotions (fear, anger, insult, guilt, envy), but negative emotion stimulates human activity aimed at avoiding harmful and dangerous exposure from the outside!
Emotion is not an enemy, but friend. If it is understood, it is easier to sort out yourself. If some person annoys, instead of hiding the negative, is it better not to communicate with him? If you are afraid of something, maybe you do not need to do this, and if you do, I first get rid of fear? If envy arises, maybe it's time to stop comparing yourself with someone and become more confident in yourself?
What emotions do you most closely control?
When we think about emotions, it seems that this is something high and not permanent. We can't own them, so call them specially. This is only an uncontrolled response to some event. Or not?
The topic of how to control your emotions is quite interesting, because there are many situations when it would be very useful. Acting, business negotiations, poker game and communication with representatives of the opposite sex - Here the skills of management of emotions will be as ever by the way.
What is emotion?
It is impossible to manage your emotions well something, without understanding how they are arranged. Let's take a closer look, what are the emotions and what they depend on.
If you show curiosity and refer to Wikipedia, even there will be written "emotions, like many other mental phenomena, studied weakly and are understood by different authors in different ways, so the definition cannot be considered as accurate nor generally accepted."
Despite such uncertainty, emotions and control of emotions were studied to such an extent that they could be separated from feelings and sentiment.
Emotions are fully focused inside us and are based on our inner state with respect to us. I'm scared - this is an emotion. Feelings are based on the reaction caused by an external factor. I'm afraid this dog is a feeling.
Comparing emotions and moods, you can allocate their main difference - Figure. The mood can stay on days, while emotions can change each other at least every second.
Emotional person
Source: iStock
It is curious that natural instincts are dull over time, but develops intensively and becomes more and more diverse emotional components. Initially, we had only those emotions that are necessary for survival - fear, pain, attraction.
But now a person knows how to distinguish a subtle humor and gets aesthetic pleasure from art objects. Such qualities do not increase the chances of winning the evolutionary struggle, they became part of our social life. At a minimum, without this you would never think about how to learn to control your emotions.
A non-meamological person for us becomes a strange outcast of society. It is difficult to understand, it is difficult for him to sympathize. Emotions - a sign of a member of the human society, a sign of "his". That is why control over emotions can bring a fruitful result.
Problems of control
The need to understand how to control their emotions, comes only in two cases: when it is necessary to hide real emotions and when it is necessary to demonstrate that emotion that you do not have.
And in the first and in the second situation, the main goal is to interact with society. We can always be sincerely in the emotional plan with you, but with the outside world we have to pretend and worry, manage your emotions.
If you are reading this article, it is unlikely that you are interested in how to own acting game or play poker games. Your problem is to control emotions that interfere with normal existence, thinking, work and rest. It is on this that we focus.
Emotion management techniques
To solve your problem, we can recommend a couple of effective ways to influence emotions, their submission. Of course, with the most powerful emotions, you are unlikely to be able to cope on your own, but fear, excitement and indignation will be fully able to you.
Technique 1. Balance
Balance and harmony are important in any sphere of life. Emotions, even the most pleasant, must also be balanced. Do not let the wiping to panic or, on the contrary, in blind carelessness. Do not allow love to move into obsession or composure.
The extremes are very dangerous, learn to balancing in the middle, then you can feel the levers of management of our emotions and understand how to learn to control your emotions.
Technique 2. Breathing
Oxygen not only feeds our cells, but also relaxes the body. When we experience strong emotions, it becomes difficult to manage yourself. I know the feeling when it's hard to say at least the word? A deep breathing technique can help get rid of such a state.
Source: iStock
Leave all your affairs, slowly pull the air with your nose to full lungs, hold it inside and slowly release it through your mouth. It is recommended to make this technique in a ratio of 5-2-5 seconds. Repeating such a cycle 10 times, you will immediately feel relief that will help restrain emotions.
Technique 3. Removal
Emotions are rolling like a snowball. Get off from his path and give yourself to stay. Hide in some other place and try to distract something else.
Just do not think about what causes you a storm of emotions. Ideally try to fall asleep. This will help manage your emotions.
After the respite, your brain will process information a little different, which will allow you to take yourself under control and more effectively restrain emotions.
Technique 4. Surroundings
People that surround us affect our emotions. Surrounding yourself with melancholic introverts, you will begin to adapt to them and their behavior.
Surrounding yourself with active extroverts, expect a real madness in which you will forget what emotion management.
Adjust your surroundings under that emotional background you wish. Do not go to the party, if you feel that you can burst in front of a huge crowd, and you do not know how to own yourself in such a state. The same applies to communicating with friends who can talk and withdraw on emotions.
Technique 5. vector thoughts
What do you think on emotions? Of course, what causes these emotions. This is exactly the way of thinking, which leads to even greater problems, stress and excitement. You need to think about the friend about what will help restrain emotions.
Having a problem, try to focus only on her solution. So you will protect the feeling of hopelessness, because you at least try. Also, you can really find the way out of their situation that finally will save you from emotional captivity.
Why do you need control?
Full control of emotions - myth. We can restrain themselves, deceive or translate attention to something else, but may not continue to continue. Cleaning can lead to psychological problems and further difficulties in communicating.
If you really want to limit yourself in this sense, make small respite. Select the time when you will be absolutely sincere in your emotions, or with yourself, or with others.
Do not want to never think about how to control your emotions? Enjoy yourself to whom you can be yourself. Such people will take you and your emotions, because to hide them equally hide yourself.
Every person wants to be happy to succeed, create a prosperous family. To do this, he creates plans, determines its goals and objectives, imagining the plan to solve them and its own actions. But the person is teteful to be distracted, forget about everything he has conceived, leaving a momentary desire or action that does not correspond to the selected plan of actions. Drinking to a fleeting desire, the individual is characteristic not only to forget about the plans constructed, but also difficult to return to their implementation. The reason for all this is the absence of the personality of the ability to control their actions, desires and emotions. The ability to control his own "I" is the nature of the nature of the individual, helping to hold unnecessary emotions, take under its own feeling control, the ability at any time to act purposefully, to restrain impulsive motives, while follow the established standards and rules of behavior.
The deprived of self-control of his own emotional states and feelings, a person is able to easily succumb to them and commit uncontrollable, rampant deeds. The ability to restrain and self-compose is the qualities of which in the modern world lacks the majority. Due to the presence of various species and various education of individuals, situations called conflicts are very often occurring. The emotionality of a person, the absence of self-control skills, the control of their own emotions leads to destructive consequences, changes in the mental state of the individual, the development of aggression. Therefore, how to learn yourself to control and do not be angry - this is a question not from simple, but one of the frequently asked psychologists.
A person is experiencing deep respect, admiration and the most important thing is the desire to become similar, looking at the personality capable of controlling the emotions, to act according to the goals set, able to succeed without being distracted by minor desires, focus on the main thing, separating the minor from truly important.
How to control yourself and not nervous? Realize that this is the quality of the person necessary, find the point of contact that encourages agreement with its own "I". Restraint and ability to control helps to regulate the levels of emotional manifestations, which allows us to succeed in various fields, the most important thing is to establish a mental balance and keep a healthy psyche. The possession of the quality of control allows the individual to feel protected, to achieve personal freedom, to achieve respect from themselves and from the people around them. A person can not obey, but to overcome their own momentary desires - strong, able to overcome all sorts of difficulties. Meanwhile, his Will's power is hard to break through who wishes evil this individual. Restrained people are able to control themselves, their own actions, thoughts, emotions, actions.
How to learn yourself to control and do not be angry with others? How to learn to act right? Acts, later, a person repents, often committed in a state of an emotional discount and going on false feelings. There is absolutely nothing good that human emotions occupy an upper step above his mind. Everything should interact harmoniously, leading to a person to success in the professional sphere, in the life of personal and inner peace of mind. Consequently, a person wants to learn control should carefully analyze his own behavior and desire. By doing this, find "weak points", where it allows you to give slack and allow emotions to take the top.
Yitzhak Pintoshevich, a person who is a coach of success of human livelihoods expressed the opinion that for the effectiveness and success of the achievement of self-control, the control should consist of three components that should develop at the same time:
- the first thing - subject must learn to treat itself honestly, do not be deceived and not to create illusions around;
- Second - control should exist in two planes: internal and external. Controlling the fulfillment of the task itself, a person can tell about her to his colleagues or friends, while promising them if it does not fulfill at the appointed time, pay a fine. External incentive, allows not to be distracted by third-party classes, but to go in the direction assigned;
- The third - control of their behavior must be carried out systematically and only. If the individual will be engaged in self-control from the case, it will be just a waste of time, and the person himself confident in his efforts aimed at control will complain about life, fate, consequently disappointing in his own vitality, as he did not work.
Man beginning to study, should draw up a list of goals set, following the relevant hierarchy. This list should always be in sight: on the desktop, on the refrigerator, on the wall, which the individual sees waking up. It is necessary to control the actions performed every day, noting even the slightest advance towards the goal.
Finding into a variety of situations, joyful, or sad, should be analyzed taking place and track their own reaction, which emotional response comes out and at what moments.
By determining the situations that cause a "storm of emotions", the individual needs to be understood and realized whether such experiences are worth it. Perhaps to submit the worst decision of the situation, which will allow to realize which of the consequences will be more destructive for the psychological state of the individual: the consequences of the occurrence of the situation or inadequate, emotional-raised behavior.
For the emission of accumulated negative energy, sports is well suited: any kind of struggle or self-defense. Important is the internal desire of the individual to get rid of negative emotions. This can be made by another way, more loyal in relation to their own physical health and to the health of others. For example, if the individual does not like some subject, so that a person is ready to climb into a fight or just destroy it, it really needs to be done. But you need to make it mentally! In that situation, when a person becomes no comfortable at the time of communication with the entity of hatred, you should have done mentally everything that I want with this subject. It is also possible to use paper as a means to help get rid of negative emotions: you can draw a person who hates, and a number of problems that appeared thanks to this person. Then the sheet should be burned, and mentally or even verbally put a point in a relationship with a person.
Faced daily with, rudeness and injustice, the individual should not be upset and react violently every time. Without the possibility of changing the circumstances, you should simply change the attitude towards them, with your own ratio to cope much easier.
The emotional state of the personality relatively depends on the state of its finance. It should be kept under control of your financial situation, loans, costs and income. The smaller the shortcomings there are problems in the direction of finance, the less reasons will be distracted, pay attention and spend their strength.
Creating a maximum comfort in the house, calm in all matters and relationships, the ability at any time influence what is happening - this is the easiest way to control your own emotional experiences.
How to learn to control yourself in alcohol
Self-adjoint - quality concluded not only in the ability to regulate emotions and feelings, but also their habits, hobbies and actions. Often there are many difficulties in controlling alcohol consumption. Alcohol is a certain kind of toxin, the use of which to refuse is relatively hard, but many have no such desire. There is only a desire to learn how to control the edge of the pervolored. Many drinks with the presence of alcohol, getting into the body, show their impact not immediately, but after a certain time. It is because of this individuals who are generally drunk in small quantities turn out to be the most drunk from the whole large company.
There are several ways to learn yourself to control in alcohol and do not be angry with the consequences.
The first thing to make an individual is to realize that the use of alcohol weakens the will of the person, the ability to control their actions. After all, for many people, everything begins with the use of alcohol in a large circle of friends, in honor of the holiday. But this usual consumption can turn into excessive, regardless of the situation. Over the course of a certain amount of time, the individual faces the circumstance that his life has changed efficiently and dropped at a completely uncommitable level of being.
A realization of the fact that drinking has become uncontrollable becomes the second step towards the implementation of alcohol consumption. An individual should be confessed that it turned into its weakness. As soon as he recognizes that weak, the moment is capable of moving a person further along the path of solving the problem.
It should be avoided by the use of alcohol alone. "If it's just beer," many will notice. The use of beer becomes the source of alcoholism, and leads to the form that it is very difficult to heal. Avoid and the companies where they often drink, especially without reason. It is important to learn its norm and always try to control it.
If the individual knows that in his free time it is able to easily go and knock over the bottle of alcohol, the rules of free pastime should be installed. Instead of a noisy company with alcohol and walking until the morning, it is better to go to the cinema, theater, go on a jog. It is necessary to lead the most active lifestyle, find a hobby that will bring the same pleasure as alcohol. But if you have to go for a holiday that means use, you should clearly define the amount of alcohol that will drink. It will be even better if your friend or girlfriend knows about it, which can also control.
It should learn to put a healthy lifestyle for the goal, extracting pleasure without the use of any toxins.
How to learn to control appetite
A large number of girls ruffle their health with various diets and starvations, in order to lose weight, which is considered superfluous, lead themselves in shape to like men. After some time of inaction, the girls are gaining weight again, it leads to irritability, anger is sometimes to depression. Experts involved in proper nutrition, argue that it is more efficient way to remove excess weight, only regulation of its own appetite. That is, it should be learn to recognize the desires of the organism itself, how to satisfy them, controlling their appetite. Scientists allocate various types of hunger, respectively, this requires various methods of control.
So there is a visual hunger when passing by the shop windows with buns, a person notices Croissant or pies, which causes an instant thirst to eat it. The type of food provokes the release of a certain set of hormones into the blood that provoke a feeling of hunger.
How to control visual hunger:
- A person first should be switched to a completely different object. Figuratively speaking, eat the eyes of a passing cute guy or an apple shown on a poster;
- Before eating food, it is worth considering it carefully, as far as everything looks appetizing;
- Even if the meal takes place alone, the table setting should be perfect, up to the color of the tablecloth and correctly arrange meals on a plate.
Physiological hunger is a decline of strength, a rumbling in the stomach, headache. These are signs that the body requires to replenish energy reserves.
How to control appetite:
- slowly take food, paying attention to the signals feeding by the body;
- Stay among meals, in order to evaluate the strength;
- Do not confuse hunger with or anxiety.
Taste hunger, may be due to the desire to feel a special taste, something specific or original.
To control the flavoring hunger you need:
- to use the same product in different dishes (for example, to prepare fish for a couple, in the furnace or make fish memers;
- try to maximize the diversion of the food you accept, even if it wakes something extraordinary.
It should also learn how to ask questions to yourself: "Is it worth it?" Is I confident that I really want this? " Until you get a true answer to these questions, do not climb simply the stomach.
1 year AGO.
Imagine your usual morning. You wake up, displeased looking at the arrow of the alarm clock. Then, enjoying the first cup of morning coffee, you think that everything is not so bad. Running from powerless rage, hitting a traffic jam. Rejoice in the praise of the boss. Upsess, having learned bad news. Just one morning, and the contrast of the emotions, which we are experiencing, can be like rapid swing swings.
Emotions - an integral part of our life. We like it or not, but such is human nature, what surrounds us causes us an emotional reaction. As a rule, this reaction should be immediately over the event, so often strong emotions are called "outbreaks", and they can be both positive and sharply negative. How do such reactions affect us? Harm in them or benefit? And why do I need emotions?
Speaking by scientific language, emotion is a state associated with the assessment of the significance of factors acting on it. But this does not mean that the bright reaction can cause objects and events surrounding us, but only those that are related to our needs and interests. The mechanism of the emergence of an ancient ancient, like humanity itself. And nothing but emotions are a mechanism for regulating the relationship between a person with an external world. The main reactions experienced by man practically do not differ from those who have experienced prehistoric people.
In fact, whatever difficult for us our emotions, they can all be reduced to three simple steam experiences, namely:
- "Pleasure - displeasure";
- "Voltage - permission";
- "Excitation is soothing."
Each of us probably noticed how differently we can respond to significant events. Something causes excitement in us, cheerfulness, or, on the contrary, anger or hatred. In this case, we are like something pushing on immediate actions, we cannot be silent and behave calmly. Other events and phenomena, on the contrary, we are paralyzed, we find ourselves as a passive contemplator, we seem to leave forces. Thus, it can be concluded that different emotions can us how to give energy and take it away.
If we were not experiencing emotions
There is an opinion that the emotionally we are, the more problems we create yourself. However, we would get rid of problems if there were no emotions at all? Let's consider such a hypothetical situation. We are on the way it turns out, for example, a furious bull. Natural emotion in this case will be fear. Fear will cause instant actions that will allow us to avoid this danger. The lack of fear can have very deplorable consequences here. And it turns out that the correct emotions in the right place and at the right time will become for us and a protective reaction, and the appeal to action, and the way of activating energy.
Fortunately, not so often we have to deal with such an obvious danger. But if you think about it, our reaction to phenomena is insignificant can be exaggerated, and the consequences of this completely turn out to be committed unpredictable. Remember how many times you "in the hearts" could talk extra closest, bosses, colleagues. A person who can manage our emotions can easily manipulate us, and this is still a big danger. It turns out that it is important not only to experience emotions, but also be able to control them and sometimes restrain.
But there is one very important point in this process. It is impossible to confuse the control of their emotions with suppression.
Management and suppression of emotions - what is the difference?
Sigmund Freud, who does not need a separate view, said: "Unfortunately, depressed emotions do not die. They were forced to silence. And they from the inside continue to influence the person. " The consequences of such an influence, alas, are far from positive. We often transfer the negative from such depressed states to other areas of our life. We can break on children, wife, husband, stranger, just because they gave anger at the moment when circumstances did not allow us to throw it out. By able to manage emotions, we could transform negative energy into a positive, or at least neutral. But, as you can see, the depressed energy will sooner or later find an outlet ... And if so, let's learn to cope with your emotional states with as much harm as possible for yourself and others.
How to control your emotions
There are a large number of techniques that will help you to cope with your emotions will help you learn how to learn how to express your feelings. Sometimes we need to hide for various reasons what we actually feel. Compliance with subordination, good manners, general cultural norms dictate us a certain model of behavior, which sometimes goes into the incision with what we actually feel. Sometimes too strong reaction does not allow us to convey to the interlocutor, what exactly we want to say what feelings we are trying to express. And in this case, we need to take yourself in hand. What is it worth starting, so as not to succumb to your own emotions, but to benefit from them?
Exercises for control of emotions in psychology
Of course, it will require efforts from us. But the result of this work will be the control of emotions and composure in any life situation.
Everyone knows that a good mood in the morning can, as they say, do all day. Pay yourself at least a few minutes after waking up, keep in a relaxed atmosphere, call the thoughts about all the problems, think about the good thing that can bring you the upcoming day. Do not see news, do not cling to your relatives. Remember that and their day begins now and they absolutely do not need to spoil it.
Very simple, but a very effective means - a smile. And the first person to whom you will smile - you yourself. Stand in front of the mirror. Make a few deep breaths, look at yourself and smile from the heart, like the most native, closest man. Slash your favorite affirmations, find a reason to praise yourself now. Whatever the banal it seems to you this action, it will definitely raise you the mood, and this is the key to calm and equilibrium. Hold a smile on the face throughout this exercise, even if you want to stop doing it with unusual.
During the day, anyone can happen and the achieved state of calm can easily collapse. We offer you simple steps to control emotions. Another capital truth is the best medicine. It not only increases the mood, but also the total tone of the whole organism. During laughter, the influx of oxygen to the brain increases, it begins to work more active. Just a few minutes of sincere laughter can replace a couple of hours of rest. After such a beneficial effect, negative emotions will be much more difficult to take over us. Well, the reason to laugh can be found without much difficulty, at least remember a funny situation or anecdote.
If your negative emotion is directed to a particular person, connect your imagination. Imagine it in a ridiculous suit, or in general without it, in a funny situation. Remember that if you are laughing, it is already much more difficult to pour you out, positive emotions neutralize the action of negative.
Another method is to mentally bring the situation to the absurdity. In this case, you need to realize your emotion, understand why you are experiencing it, and mentally develop this situation, it is advisable to make unexpected funny conclusions, or representing the most positive outcome. Of course, this approach will not solve the problem that has arisen, but our task is at the moment - to avoid negative emotions - can be solved with minimal efforts.
These simple techniques can be used as a means of emergency, when you need here and now take emotions under control. But sometimes everything is much more complicated, and the technique in this case will need more serious.
Detaching from emotion
The negative reaction can sometimes be so strong, so painful that it can adversely affect your mental and physical condition. This factor can be, for example, a sense of strong fear or irritation, when something is outside the zone of your control. In this case, the ability to take a look at everything as it were from the side. Realize your emotion, say to yourself: "I'm angry (angry, I annoy) because ..." Find the cause of this feeling and imagine that you are watching you see how emotions affect you. The role of an outside observer will help you to focus not on the irritant, but on you, on our own reaction, in the awareness of its own and its consequences. The awareness and statement of emotions will help to find the speedy way to eliminate it. Your concentration on observation will help abstract from unpleasant sensations and feelings. The preservation of the balance and self-control will become the usual and very easy practice for you, if a little exercise at each other case.
Switching attention
It is very difficult to control your thoughts, and it is often precisely they become the source of many of our negative emotions. It is useless to force yourself not to think about the bad. The more we try to suppress these thoughts in themselves, the stronger they germinate in us. In class practices, the teacher as she asked his students, whatever they did during the next five minutes, do not think about the Green Monkey. And if they still think, sign a sign, slamming in your hands. Over the next five minutes, nothing was heard, except for applause. It is necessary to be able to switch the attention so that the new lesson captures you completely, not allowing evil thoughts of weeds to germinate in your mind. Favorite hobby, funny comedy, music, walk. Any person has such "peeling sticks", which can switch you to a completely different wave. Use them every time the need for it.
Outcasting for relaxation
The ability to relax will be an excellent means of control of emotions. Modern rhythm of life requires more voltage from us every day, we are tiring more and more, we live at the limit. But all these factors will have a smaller impact on you if you master such a technique as autotraining.
Outcasting - This is a way of self-regulation of its condition, which reminds hypnosis, with the only difference that the psychologist or hypnotist is immersed in the transcender state, and you yourself. In order for this practice to bring you a maximum benefit, it is necessary to carry out it regularly, observing all its steps in succession.
The first stage is relaxing. Take a comfortable posture, sitting or lying. The main thing is that in this posture you could achieve maximum relaxation of all muscles. Take care of comfortable clothes, quiet calm atmosphere, eliminate all potential stimuli on autotraining time. You can enable quiet music for meditation, but only if it does not distract you from the experience of your own states. Focus on my breath. It should be deep and smooth. Mentally watch the air fills your lungs and leaves them. Imagine how each cell of your body relaxes, from the tips of the fingers to the top. When you feel the pleasant severity of the whole body, you can go to the next stage.
The second stage is a suggestion. To this stage will need to be prepared in advance. Think over or select a positive setting suitable for your needs in the appropriate literature. Avoid negative structures, the installation must be fully positive. Do not use the phrases "I will try", "I will try", only allegations, for example, "I will do", "I can", "I will achieve." Take these phrases several times to yourself, as if you scroll through the same record. Visualization will be very effective at this stage. The brighter you present a picture of what you strive for, the stronger it is imprinted in your subconscious.
Examples of autotraining installations:
- I am calm and balanced. I am able to fully control my emotions.
- All problems remain in the past. In my life there is a place just for success.
- My affairs are going every day better.
It will be better if such phrases make you, having familiar to yourself. In this case, their perception will be more durable.
Third stage - exit from autotraining. Do not do it sharply. Gradually, begin to focus on the sensations of your body, slightly move your fingers, pull. You can start the countdown from 10 to 1, mentally saying that you will leave relaxation to the "one" from relaxation. If you do it before bedtime, change the wording, "at the expense of one I will fall asleep and in the morning I wake up easily, slept and energetic."
This technique will help you, but only if you apply it regularly, and not from the case towards the case.
When emotions need to restrain
We have already dealt with you that emotions will be with us, as part of our nature, regardless of our desire. We know how to restrain themselves in emotions, not allowing the circumstances to dictate to us how to do. In what situations is the self-control of self-control?
- Family life. Very often, our loved ones become the target of our poor mood.
- Social situations. We are very easy to leave yourself in public transport, in a long queue in the store, a bank, in the mail. In this case, we splash our irritation on people, thereby the negative. Remove from emotions in this case, do not take everything close to the heart.
- Work. It takes most of our life, so we inevitably face numerous stress problems. Find the opportunity to relax for a few minutes and do not allow negative influence.
Remember that managing emotions, you make your life with a brighter and full-fledged, free of negative and its consequences. Successes to you in mastering self-control technician.
