Conflict resolution styles (for conflict participants). What style of resolution of the conflict does not exist

This style implies that a person tries to escape from the conflict. His position is not to fall in situations that provoke the emergence of contradictions, not to join the discussion of issues fraught with disagreements. Then it is not necessary to come to an excited state, even if dealing with the problem.

Smoothing

With this style, the person is convinced that he should not be angry, because "We are all one happy team, and you should not rock the boat." Such a "smoother" tries not to release the signs of conflict, appealing to solidarity needs. But at the same time you can forget about the problem underlying the conflict. As a result, peace and peace may occur, but the problem will remain, which will eventually lead to an "explosion."

Compulsion

As part of this style, attempts are prevailing to make their point of view at any cost. The one who is trying to do this is not interested in the opinion of others, usually behaves aggressively, for influencing others uses power by coercion. This style can be effective where the manager has a great power over subordinates, but it can suppress the initiative of the subordinates, to create a greater likelihood that an incorrect decision will be made, since only one point of view is presented. It can cause indignation, especially in younger and more educated personnel.

Compromise

This style is characterized by a point of view of the other side, but only to some extent. The ability to compromise is highly appreciated in management situations, as this minimizes ill-gratefulness, which often makes it possible to quickly resolve the conflict to the satisfaction of both sides. However, the use of a compromise at an early stage of the conflict that has arisen on an important issue can reduce the search time alternatives.

Solution to the problem

This style is a recognition of differences in opinions and readiness to familiarize yourself with other points of view in order to understand the causes of the conflict and find a course of action acceptable for all parties. The one who uses such a style does not try to achieve its goal at the expense of others, and rather is looking for the best solution. This style is the most effective in solving the problems of the organization. Below are some suggestions on the use of this conflict resolution style: determine the problem in categories of goals, and not solutions. After the problem is defined, determine the solutions that are acceptable for all sides. Focus on the problem, and not on the personal qualities of the other party. Create an atmosphere of trust by increasing the mutual influence and exchange of information. During communication, create a positive attitude towards each other, showing sympathy and listening to the opinion of the other party.

Conflict resolution

To date, specialists have developed a lot of all kinds of recommendations relating to various aspects of people's behavior in conflict situations, choosing relevant strategies and means of their permission, as well as their management.

It is important to consider both the actions of the participants of the conflict and actions, the role of the mediator who may be the head

The behavior of the head in conflict.

The primary task of the leader who has to resolve the conflict is to find out the true cause of the conflict, which is often quite difficult to do, as it is consciously or unconsciously, it is most often masked by the conflict participants. For example, care about the case or principle in many cases mask selfish interests, the progress of pride, the desire of revenge for old or new offenses, etc. The complexity of the situation is that the substitution of the cause of the conflict may occur not only in order to explain their position to others, but in order to explain this to itself. The psychological mechanism of self-defense is triggered here when a person in addition to the truly moving unacceptable causes of their actions invents some noble goals and gradually begins to believe that they drive them to achieve them. In such situations, the head may proceed from two provisions:

1) try to answer the question itself, who benefits this or that resolution of the conflict;

2) The behavior of a person in a personal-emotional conflict is distinguished by an unusual variety for him, emotion, unwillingness to listen to the interlocutors.

The actions of the head aimed at the constructive resolution of the conflict are:

institutionalization of conflict . Determination of some administrative or moral rules or norms of the behavior of opponents in conflict;

legitimization of the conflict, or recognition by the conflicting parties established by the head of the rules of conduct;

structuring conflicting groups . The definition of those interests that each of the conflicting personalities, and the determination of the degree and the reasons for the deviations of these interests from the procedure established in the Organization;

reduction . Gradual weakening and subsequent resolution of the conflict.

Many conflict resolution methods can be divided into structural and interpersonal.

Conflict resolution structural methods include clarification of the requirements for work; the use of coordination and integration mechanisms; establishing corporate integrated integrated purposes; The use of a fair remuneration system.

Explaining the requirements for work and the results expected from each employee and division is one of the most effective methods for preventing destructive conflicts, since the "Business cover" of personal hostility is eliminated in this situation.

The use of coordination and integration mechanisms is based on the principle of unity. Their essence lies in bringing the subordinates of their right to contact the leader in the event of any contradictions between them. In this case, the subordinates simply fulfill the decision of the head. It is also important to create services or positions involved in integration activities, i.e. carrying out the relationship between linear and functional divisions of the enterprise.

Establishing corporate integrated targets.

The remuneration system used in the organization will be fair if it is, first, encourages employees in achieving corporate purposes; Secondly, it does not encourage the non-constructive behavior of employees and units.

The interpersonal methods of conflict resolution used are largely determined by those objectives that the leader pursues, interfere with the conflict. The main among these purposes are improving the productivity of the head of the ledmed team; preservation and improvement of the social and psychological climate in the team; The growth of the authority of the head.

A combination of interpersonal methods of conflict resolution used determines the style of behavior of the head in conflict. These styles are: competition when the head encourages opponents to rivalry, leaving the right to make a final decision; evasion , When the head occupies a third-party observer position, not considering it appropriate to spend his time and energy to resolve the conflict ; cooperation when the manager forms a single working group from the conflicting parties to resolve the problem under its own guide; device when the head is forced to take the result of the conflict as it is, regardless of own interests; compulsion , when the head adopts a sole solution, a little interested in the opinion and feelings of subordinates; This method can be effectively used by the head in the event that its competence significantly exceeds the competence of the subordinates; At the same time, its use causes hidden or open discontent, especially from young or more intellectual personnel; compromiseWhen the head is able to offer a decision that satisfies it and both conflicting parties.

Evaluate effectiveness one or another the style of behavior in a conflict situation can be in various criteria.

Conflict personality.Throughout its work activity, some people manage to be drawn into any conflict only a few times and others do not represent conflict-free relationships at work. The latter is called conflict personalities and among them you can select six basic types.

Demonstrative personalitieswho are striving to always be in sight, enjoy universal attention. If they do not have other qualities that allow them to stand out, then conflicts are for them the only way of self-expression.

Rigid(default, inflexible) personalitywhich are distinguished by high self-esteem, ambition, inappropriate and reluctance to reckon with the opinions of others. Once and for the forever, the current opinion of the Rigid person inevitably comes in a contradiction with the changing conditions and causes a conflict with others, in relation to which they are unceremonia, and sometimes just rude.

Urinary personality who are the most conscientious, scrupulous employees. They are suitable for everyone since themselves, from the perspective of overpriced requirements. Anyone who does not meet these requirements, and such a majority are sharp criticized, at the same time themselves are very sensitive to the assessment of others, especially the bosses. These features of their behavior often lead to conflicts.

Unmanaged personalities, characterized by impulsiveness, non-impact and unpredictability of behavior, the absence of self-control. Therefore, their behavior is perceived as an aggressive and causing desire to put such a person in place.

Mercenary personality which are always ready to conflict if they can be achieved by their careeristic or mercantyl purposes with its rational calculations.

Sunny personalities,the absence of their own beliefs and principles of which makes them a tool in the hands of the initiators of the conflict. The danger of such people is that they have a reputation as good, non-saying people. Therefore, the performance of such a person as the initiator of the conflict attracts to him of other people who are more striving to protect it than to understand the cause of conflict.

Undoubtedly, in the life of every person there was a moment when he wanted to avoid confrontation and asked himself a question of how to resolve the conflict. But the circumstances when there is a desire to adequately come out of a complex conflict situation, while maintaining relations. Some people face the need to exacerbate the conflict with the aim of its final permission. In any case, before each of us, the question was asked how to resolve the conflict or how to avoid it.

First of all, it is necessary to understand what the conflict is a completely normal state of personality. All the time, while a person sells conscious vital activity, it is in conflict with other people, personal groups or with himself. At the same time, if you master the skills that will help you understand how to solve the conflict, you can significantly develop and strengthen personal and professional relationships. The resolution of social conflicts is a pretty serious skill that may be very useful.

Many people do not have the concepts in which conflicts they take part, and even more so do not realize the true causes of conflicts. As a result, they cannot manage them effectively. On time, unresolved conflicts between personalities at one excellent moment will lead to intrapersonal conflicts and rather undesirable consequences. Unrealized desires and eternal experiences may cause health problems. In addition, they often spoil the character and turn the person in a loser dissatisfied with everything in the world, confronting a person down the social staircase. If you don't like such a prospect, it is worth carefully disassembled how to solve the conflict in case of its appearance. The ways of solving conflicts there are mass, so you will easily master the most necessary skills.

Let's figure out what conflict is. In psychology, this term is defined as a clash of incompatible and oppositely directed trends in relations between personalities, groups of people or in the consciousness of a separate person leading to negative emotional experiences.

Based on this definition, the foundation of the conflict situation is the collision of interests, goals and ideas. It is clearly clearly a conflict manifests itself when people do not find consent regarding their values, motivations, ideas, desires or perceptions. Often, such differences look quite trivial. However, when the conflict affects strong feelings, basic needs become the basis of the problem. These include the need for security, in solitude, proximity, in the awareness of their own value or significance. Right solution of interpersonal conflict First of all, it is focused on the primary needs of people.

Specialists have developed a variety of methods for solving conflict and recommendations for all sorts of aspects of personal behavior in situations of collision of interests or opinions. Based on possible models of conflict solutions, the goals and interests of the parties, there are the following conflict resolution styles.

• Competition style is applied when the personality is quite active and intends to move towards resolving the conflict situation, wanting to meet its own interests, often to the detriment of other people's interests. Such a person forces others to accept his way to resolve the problem. This behavior model gives the chance to implement the strengths of any idea even if they don't like someone. Among all the ways of resolving conflicts, this is one of the most tough. Choosing this style is only in that situation when you have all the necessary resources to solve the conflict in your favor, as well as when you are sure that your decision is correct. If speak about roles of the head, it periodically useful to take tough authoritarian solutions that give a positive result in the future. Of all the methods of solving conflicts, it is such a style of behavior to the most effectively teach employees to submissal without excessive ranting, and also helps to return the faith in success in the situation for the company.

In most cases, rivalry implies a sufficiently strong position. But it happens that it is resorted to such a behavior model. Often, this happens when a person has hopes for victory in the current conflict, and he seeks to prepare the soil for inciting the next one. As an example, you can consider the situation when the younger child deliberately provokes the elder, receives a deserved "remuneration", and after it immediately complains of parents from the position of the victim. In addition, there are situations in which personality enters confrontation exclusively because of its nonsense, without letting themselves a report in what consequences will have one or another conflict for him. However, most likely, if a person reads this article, he is unlikely to deliberately fall into such a disadvantageous situation and will choose among all this particular situations.

• Evasion style due to weakness is often applied when the potential loss in a particular conflict is significantly higher than the moral costs associated with the "flight". In this case, the flight may not always be any physical action. People in senior positions are often seen from the adoption of a controversial decision, while postponing or transferring an unwanted meeting or a conversation indefinitely. As an excuse, the manager can talk about the loss of documents or give useless tasks relating to the collection of additional information on some issue. Often the problem is only becoming more difficult, so you should not avoid conflicts in this way too often. Try from all ways to resolve conflictchoose this when it really is beneficial for you.

It is quite another thing when the behavior is resorted to such a style. It was then that the method is absolutely justified. A strong personality can use time in its favor in order to collect the necessary resources in order to win the conflict. At the same time, it is not worth deceiving yourself and convince that you are not really afraid of the exacerbation of the conflict, but only wait for the right moment to resolve the situation in our favor. Remember that this moment may never come. Therefore, this style of solving conflicts is worth using reasonable.

• The style of fixtures is that a person acts, focusing on the behavior of other people, while not seeking to defend their own interests. In such a situation, he recognizes the dominance of the opponent and inferior to him in conflict. This behavior model can be justified when you understand that, yielding to someone, you do not lose much. It is recommended to choose from all ways to solve conflicts style tools when you strive to preserve relationships and peace with another person or a group of people, or, if you understand that they were not right. You can use this behavior model when you are not enough power or other resources in order to win this particular conflict, or when you realize that the victory is much more important for your opponent than for you. In this case, the subject practicing the style of adaptation seeks to find a solution that will satisfy both conflicting parties.

The use of this strategy due to weakness is used when it is impossible to avoid conflict for some reason, and resistance can potentially harm the personality. As an example, you can consider the situation when you meet a company of arrogant hooligans at night in a deserted place. In this position, it is much wiser to choose the above-described method for solving interpersonal conflicts and part with the phone, rather than enter into a fight and lose your property anyway. However, in the second case, your health can be made serious harm.

Considering such a style of behavior in the context of the business, one can analyze the situation when a new company comes to the market with significantly more powerful financial, technical and administrative resources, rather than has your firm. In such a situation, it is certainly possible to put all the strength and opportunities for an active struggle with a competitor, but the probability of loss remains very high. In this situation, it will be more rational to try to adapt, finding a new market niche or, as a last resort, to sell the company to a stronger player in the market.

The strategy of adaptations in view of the strength is used when you know about the pitfalls, with which your opponent will face in the event that it is listed on its own. In such a situation, you let another person "enjoy" the consequences of his actions.

• The Style of Cooperation implies that the subject seeks to resolve the conflict in favor of its interests, but at the same time does not ignore the interests of the opponent and trying to find ways to be favorable with both of the current situation with it. Among typical circumstances under which this style uses, you can mention the following: Both sides have the same capabilities and resources to resolve any problem; The solution of the conflict is beneficial to both parties and no one wants to resolve from him; the presence of interdependent and long relations between opponents; Each of the conflicting parties is able to clearly explain its goals, express thoughts and come up with alternative options from the situation. The resolution of social conflicts in this way may be the most acceptable.

Cooperation due to the power takes place when each side has enough time and effort to find more significant common interests than those that caused the conflict. After opponents come to an understanding of global interests, you can proceed to find a method of joint implementation of the lower levels. Unfortunately, in practice, such a way of resolving conflicts is not always effective due to its complexity. . The conflict resolution process thus requires tolerance on both sides.

Cooperation due to weakness resembles a device. However, those who practice such a style are often called collaborators or traitors. A similar strategy may be effective if there is no explicit changes in the arrangement of the forces of conflicting parties in the future.

• The style of compromise implies that opponents seek to find a solution that will be based on mutual concessions. Such a strategy of the behavior of the conflicting parties is appropriate when they want the same, but at the same time they believe that it is impossible to achieve this at the same time. As an example, the following situations can be considered: the parties have equal resources, but there is mutually exclusive interest; A temporary solution can arrange each of the conflicting parties; Both opponents will be satisfied with short-term benefits. The compromise style is often becoming optimal or even the last possible solution to conflict.

Basic ways to resolve the conflict

All existing conflict resolution methods can be divided into two groups: negative methods (types of struggle, the purpose of which is to achieve the victory of one side) and positive methods. The term "negative methods" is used in the sense that the result of the conflict will be the destruction of the relationship of the unity of the parties participating in confrontation. The result of positive methods should be the preservation of unity between the conflicting parties. This includes various types of constructive rivalry and negotiations.

It should be understood that the methods of resolution of conflicts are divided into positive and negative conditionally. In practice, both methodologies can harmoniously complement each other. Moreover, the term "struggle" in the context of solving the conflict is quite common, if we talk about its content. It is no secret that the negotiation process often includes elements of struggle for any questions. Similarly, the tough struggle of the conflicting parties in no way excludes negotiations on specific rules. It is impossible to present progress without creative rivalry of old and new ideas. At the same time, both conflicting parties pursue one goal - the development of a certain sphere.

Despite the fact that there are many types of struggle, each of them is inherent in general signs, since any struggle involves the interaction of two subjects, in which one prevents the other.

The main condition of victory in the event of an armed struggle is to achieve one-to-one superiority and the concentration of forces at the point of the main bout. A similar reception characterizes the main strategy of other types of struggle, which, for example, is a game of chess. The winner comes out the one who can focus the figures in the place where the decisive direction of attack on the opponent's king is located.

In any struggle, you should be able to choose the right field of the decisive battle, to focus the strength in this place and pick up the moment for the attack. Any method of struggle involves a certain combination of these major components.

The main goal of the struggle is to change the conflict situation. You can achieve this in the following ways:

• Impact on the opponent, his defense and the situation;
• A change in the ratio of forces;
• False or truthful enemy information about their intentions;
• Obtaining a correct assessment of the situation and the capabilities of the enemy.

Various methods of struggle apply all these methods in different combinations.

Let's look at some methods that are used in the process of struggle. One of them is to achieve victory in view of obtaining the necessary freedom of action. This method can be realized by such techniques: the formation of freedom of action for itself; restriction of the freedom of the enemy; acquiring more favorable positions in confrontation, even the cost of losing certain benefits, etc. For example, in the process of the dispute, it may be very effective to accept the imposition of the opponent in which it is noncompeatient. Thus, a person can compromise himself.

Pretty effective is the method of using one conflicting side of the opponent reserves for its benefit. Excellent techniques that demonstrate the effectiveness of the method can be forcing the enemy to useful actions for the other side.

An important method of struggle is the priority dissemination of the main managerial centers of conflicting complexes. They can be guidelines or institutions, as well as the main elements of the position of the opponent. In the process of discussion (here without art oratory art It is difficult to do).) The discrediting of the leading representatives of the opponent's side and refutation of the abstracts of their position is actively practiced. For example, in the process of political struggle, a rather effective method is the criticism of negative features of leaders, as well as the demonstration of their insolvency.

The basic principle of resolving any conflict is efficiency and timeliness. However, in the process of struggle, the method of delaying the case can be quite successfully successfully used, which is also called the "Wire Method". Such a reception is a special case when the right time is selected and the place of applying the final impact, as well as the creation of a favorable relationship.

A slow transition to decisive actions can be appropriate if necessary to focus significant resources for winning victory. Aphorism "Time works on us" clearly describes the basic essence of this method. If we talk about the discussion, then this method implies the desire to take the word in the last place when all opponents will speak. In such a situation, there is a chance to bring arguments that were not subjected to serious attacks in previous speeches.

Wire method is used for a long time ago. Plutarch was described a case when this style was applied by the Roman Dictator Sulla. When he realized that he was surrounded by significant enemy forces, he called to his negotiations of the second Consul - Scipion. After that, a long-term meeting and meetings began, on which Sulla was postponing each time. At the same time, he laid the moral spirit of the opponent's soldier with his cunning assistants. Scypion's warriors were bruoked with money and other values. As a result, when the Sulla's troops approached the Camp of the Scipio, the soldiers moved to the side of the dictator, and the second consul was captured in his camp.

The care of the struggle is also a fairly effective method that is partly connected with the previous one. In this case, the process of resolution of the conflict occurs in the style of evasion. It is used in some cases: with the unresolved task of mobilizing resources and victory forces; To lure the opponent in the trap prepared in advance in order to win the time and change the situation on a more profitable one.

Positive methods of solving conflict First include negotiations. When a special focus is made to negotiations as a component of the conflict, the parties seek to lead them from the position of force in order to achieve one-sided victory. It goes without saying, such a nature of negotiations leads only to partial resolution of the conflict. At the same time, negotiations are only an addition to the victory over the opponent. In the event that negotiations are considered as a conflict settlement method, they take the form of open debates implying mutual concessions and partial satisfaction of the interests of both parties.

The method of negotiations based on certain principles can be characterized by four fundamental rules, each of which constitutes the negotiation element and is a recommendation for their conduct.

• Separate the concepts of "negotiators" and "subject of negotiations". Since any person who participates in the negotiations, has certain features of character, it is not necessary to discuss a separate personality, as this will bring a number of emotional barriers. IN process critics Participants themselves are only sharpened.
• Focus on interest, and not in position, since the second can hide the true goals of the negotiation participants. At the same time, the basis of contradictory positions is often the interests. That is why it is worth focusing on the second. It is worth remembering that opposite positions always hide more interests compared to those who are reflected in the positions themselves.
• Consider profitable conflict resolution options for both sides. An agreement based on interests pushes participants to the search for beneficial to all solutions by analyzing options that will satisfy both parties. Thus, the debate acquire the nature of the "We Against Problem" dialogue instead of the discussion in the format "I am against you."
• Get out the search for objective criteria. Consent should have a criterion neutral with respect to opponents. Exceptionally, in this case, the consensus will be equitable and long. The subjective criteria lead to the infringement of one of the parties and the complete destruction of the consent. Objective criteria are formed on the basis of a clear understanding of the essence of the problems.

The validity of the decisions taken directly depends on the procedures for resolving contradictions, such as elimination of disputes by drawing, delegation of decision making a third party, etc. Variations of the last resolution of conflict resolution Great set.

Remember that high emotionality in the conflict resolution process is a barrier on the way to its successful settlement. The ability to effectively resolve social conflicts directly depends on your skills, such as:

• Calm and stress resistance. Such personal qualities will allow more complicated verbal and non-verbal communications.
• The ability to control their behavior and emotions. If you know how to do this, you will always bring your needs to an opponent without unnecessary irritation or intimidation.
• The ability to listen and pay attention to the words and manifestation of feelings of other people.
• Awareness that all people are coping with a different situation.
• Ability to avoid offensive deeds and words.

To get such skills, you need to develop stress resistance and ability control your emotions. So you will feel comfortable on ways of solving conflictcomplex level.

What you need to know about resolving conflicts

The incomplete solution of interpersonal conflicts leads to their renewal. However, it is not necessary to perceive it as a flawed effect, since not every conflict can be resolved from the first time. For example, political parties lead permanent battles that do not stop long years throughout their existence.

Conflict can be viewed as an opportunity for development. If you can resolve the conflict in relationships, you get confidence in the form of award. You have confidence that your relationship does not collapse from various troubles.

If in your eyes the conflict looks awesome, it means that subconsciously you expect it will not be allowed mutually beneficial. For many, the conflict in relationships looks like something dangerous and frightening. In some cases, it can really be traumatic, especially if life experience has left you a feeling of powerlessness and loss of control. In this case, you conflict with a sense of threat and, accordingly, cannot resolve it qualitatively. In most cases, you will go on concessions or, on the contrary, you are angry.

Each if desired can effectively use these methods of resolution of conflict. In this case, a separate person may have one most frequently used conflict resolution style. Depending on how the person is asserted and active, he chooses one or another strategy. You can choose the optimal styles of solving conflicts that are suitable for you.

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Conflict situation

Conflict situations will inevitably rise almost in any business. Conflicts arise everywhere where people interact. And the ability to resolve conflicts is an important skill for both an entrepreneur or top manager and ordinary employees.

Conflicts arise in a variety of work situations. In general, this is normal, since different people can have different views on the same things. Sometimes people try to avoid conflict situations, "lean" conflict. But sometimes there is an urgent need for the opposite - to make an aggravation of the conflict situation to put all the points over I and come to some clear decision. At the same time, it is desirable to get out of a conflict situation, keeping the face and normal business relationships with your business colleagues or business partners.

By the way, there are not only conflicts with other people, but also conflicts with themselves (internal conflicts). For example, you work as an individual entrepreneur. And you want to simultaneously launch two projects that compete for your limited resources (time, money, strength).

Conflictology

The word conflict itself comes from the Latin Conflictus, which is translated as encountered. The conflict is the most acute way to interact people when they disagree their views on the situation, an event or something else. There is a separate science conflictology, which studies conflicts.

The conflict arises when one of the parties to the conflict participates occupies a position that contradicts the position of the second participant. In the psychology conflict, it is customary to call the situation of disagreement with two or more parties. It can be both specific people and a whole group of people.

The main strategies of action in case of conflict

People behave in different ways in case of conflict. From here different styles of resolution conflicts.

• Cooperation. The parties are trying to negotiate and find the conflict solution suitable for them. This is usually the optimal style of solving a controversial situation, as the interests of both sides are taken into account. It is also called the strategy "won-won." When both parties are in the plus and due to joint efforts allow the disputed conflict situation optimal for all means.
• Rivalry. Both sides are actively opposed to each other. This is a competition style, which is usually found when the personality participants of the conflict are active. With rivalry and competitive approach, the person tends to impose his point of view to the other party in various ways. Psychological pressure, argument and even hysterics. This is the most rigid conflict resolution style, which cannot be called democratic. To such a style of resolution of conflicts often have to resort to managers, because If you take into account the opinion of each employee, then in the end you can not move anywhere at all. Rivalry and competition involves the presence of a strong position. Also, a person must have, which differs from the opinion of others.
• Compromise. It is the finding of some solution that is badly suited to both sides, but does not suit both 100%. It is about the fact that each member of the dispute will give way to something, somewhere comes on the neck of his interests. The compromise is suitable for solving conflicts if both sides are short-term benefits.
• Avoiding. Escape. This is when one of the parties avoids a conflict situation in all possible ways. Up to the physical avoidance of contacts with the second party. The conflict evasion style is used when the risks of the open conflict outweigh the significance of moral discomfort from the avoidance or flight strategy. The flight can manifest themselves physically - when he saw a person from afar in the corridor, the second avoids with him to intersect. The flight can be a figurative when the head defects a difficult decision for later. Engaged. This is, in fact, there is evasion from making a decision to avoid a conflict situation.
• Device. One side goes to the requirements of the second, but has an excellent opinion that fears to voice out loud. This style of conflict solving is not in your favor can be justified when you understand that you do not lose much. The device is justified when good relationships are more important for you than the momentary benefit or pursuing your position. However, you always need to know that the line, further which the strategy of adaptations turns into bulkiness. Also, the device can be justified when you have a clearly insufficient number of opportunities in order to be here and now to win in an open confrontation. Sometimes you can give someone to tactically to win in a long-term strategic game. Another motive of the device can be. However, this is not the best idea.
• Passive-aggressive behavior. This is when a person agrees with the second party, but behaves passive-aggressively. This can be expressed in tone of voice or some non-verbal signs. A man clearly hints at a different point of view, but for some reason suppresses itself. Sometimes people begin to behave like psychopaths and begin to achieve their goals.

Optimal ways to resolve conflicts

As you can see, there are a large number of tactics and ways to solve conflicts. Some of them can be called constructive. Others are neutral or destructive. Which method of solving the conflict to use - depends on the specific situation, because Everything is always individually. Sometimes more rationally go to an open conflict, without looking at the consequences than to run from the conflict or compromise. Usually, people go to open confrontation when they know that they are right and when they have a desire and the opportunity.

A significant role in solving conflicts is played by your ability to present everything in the advantageous light. And here the role is played not only your point of view, but also, for example, your ability to speak. For example, you can master. And with time and practice, it will add weight in negotiations and in any way in any situation when you defend your position. But here it is important not only the manner to speak beautifully, but also what you say.

To effectively defend your position, you need to work on yourself. In particular, I would recommend, and also to learn not only to speak beautifully, but also.

In general, the conflict should not be considered only in a negative key. The conflict is also an opportunity for development. Also conflict situations allow you to put all the points above I, find a solution that all suits. In general, the conflict is not bad and not good. Rather, it is normal for teams. It is important that the conflict does not go to the chronic stage (thereby poisoning the situation within the company). It is also important that the team does not translate into too hot and destructive stage, when all parties participating in the conflict suffer as a result of an unnecessar than harsh confrontation. And there is no benefit from the conflict.

• Vladimir Tarasova: the art of managerial struggle. The book that can be denoted as a philosophy of conflicts and the management philosophy.
• Robert Chaldini: Prsnation Psychology. Robert has several books on the subject of psychology of influence.

Internal conflict, conflict of interest

As we said, the conflict may not be only between different people. The conflict may be within the same person. For example, a person does what he does not like because of the fact that, for example, set a goal. With internal conflicts, you also need to work. Sometimes it is better not to do what you do not want, because Always do what is not like fraught with psychosomatic diseases or lack of happiness.

A person may also have a conflict of interest when he cannot hold a post, because He may have a difficult moral dilemma. For example, a person is an IP and gets to work. He is trying to conduct business and work on hiring. Or when a person is trying to work on two or three works in parallel. Combat theoretically possible. But in practice - the conflict of interest arises. Or a person risks earn. For the same reason, it is undesirable to take into his business or to his work relatives or friends. Traveling leads to the fact that the manager cannot objectively assess the work of a close subordinate. It involuntarily affects the quality of work, even if the manager and will try to maintain efficiency. It is simply impossible.

Styles of behavior in conflict

The conflict is a social phenomenon generated by the nature of public life itself. This phenomenon is conscious, and the action is thoughtful. He confirms that the truth that a person differs from other living beings by the fact that his intentions and acts are sent by unborn instincts, but by target installations that are produced by them in the process of their livelihoods. A man is endowed with a specific, only inherent in quality - reason, the ability to reflect the real world.

The conflict is a clash of opposing interests on the basis of rivalry, confrontation or lack of mutual understanding in different ways. Or in other words, the conflict appears as awareness at the level of a separate person, social group or wider community of contradictory of the process of interaction and relationships, differences, and the incompatibility of interests, value estimates and goals as meaningful confrontation.

Conflict situations arise in all spheres of public life - whether economy, politics, life, culture or ideology. They are inevitable as an integral component of the development of society and the person himself. It is impossible to imagine the formation of a separate person or the organization of the organization without internal tensions, contradictions, overcoming stagnation and cosiness, clashes and struggle. The reasons for them can be, in particular, the conditions of management, the intention of the circumstances unfavorable for the functioning; problems of labor motivation related to labor, content and prestige of work, relationships in the team between individuals and social groups; structural inconsistencies, cliffs in communicative relations, displeasure employees by the decisions of the administration; Emotional splashes caused by differences in temperament, the nature and manner of the behavior of jointly working people, their age and vital experience, moral ideas, the level of education, qualifications and a common culture.

Unconfluousness is an illusion, utopia and certainly not good. Conflicts, like any social contradictions, are a form of real public relations, which are just expressing the interaction of personalities, the relations of social groups and communities in the inconsistency, incompatibility of their needs, motives and roles. In a word, where people act almost always have a place and conflict.

There are the following five styles of conflict behavior: evasion, adaptation, confrontation, collaboration, compromise.

What do each of the named behaviors in conflicts differ?

Evasion as a style of behavior in conflicts is characterized by a clear lack of the desires involved in the conflict situation to cooperate with anyone and attach active efforts to carry out their own interests, as well as go to the meeting of opponents; The desire to get out of the conflict field, to get away from the conflict.

The device as a style of passive behavior is distinguished by the tendency of conflict participants to soften, smooth the conflict situation, to preserve or restore the harmony in relationships by means of compliance, confidence, readiness for reconciliation. In contrast to evasion, this style suggests a greater extent to take into account the interests of opponents and do not avoid joint action with them. The device is applicable for any type of conflict. But, perhaps, this style of behavior is most suitable for conflicts of an organizational nature, in particular on a hierarchical vertical: the downstream - superior, subordinate - the boss, etc. In such situations, it is extremely necessary to value the maintenance of mutual understanding, a friendly location and an atmosphere of business cooperation, not to give an expanser with passionate controversy, expressing anger and even more threats, to be constantly ready to come from their own preferences if they are able to damage the interests and rights of the opponent. Of course, the style of the device selected as a sample of conflict behavior may be little efficient. It is not at all acceptable in situations when conflict subjects are covered by a feeling of resentment and irritation, they do not want to answer each other benevolent reciprocity, and their interests and goals are not amenable to smoothing and coordination.

The confrontation in its direction is focused on, actively and independently, to achieve their own interests without taking into account the interests of other parties directly participating in the conflict, and even to the detriment of them. Applying such a style of behavior seeks to impose a problem with another solution, it relies only for its strength, not a joint action. At the same time, elements of maximalism, volitional pressure, desire to any way, including power pressure, administrative and economic sanctions, intimidation, blackmail, etc., to force opponent to accept the point of view challenged to them, by all means to take the top over it, Winning conflict.

Cooperation as: and confrontation is aimed at maximum implementation by participants of their own interests. But in contrast to confrontational style, cooperation implies not individual, but a joint search for such a decision, which meets the aspirations of all conflicting parties. This is possible, subject to timely and accurate diagnosis of the problem that has breeding a conflict situation, clarifying both external manifestations and hidden causes of conflict, the readiness of the parties to act in conjunction for achieving common to all goals. The style of cooperation is willing to use those who perceives the conflict as a normal phenomenon of social life, as the need to solve this or that problem without damaging any party.

The compromise occupies a median place in the grid of styles of conflict behavior. It means the locality of the participant (participants) of the conflict to resolve disagreement on the basis of mutual concessions, achieving partial satisfaction of its interests. This style equally implies active and passive actions, an application of individual and collective efforts. The style of compromise is preferable to the fact that it usually blocks the path to ill-gratefulness, allows, although in part, to satisfy the claims of each of the parties involved in the conflict.

Methods for resolving conflicts.

The style of behavior in the conflict coincides with the value with the method of its permission. Regarding communication between people, the style is a manner of behaving, a combination of characteristic techniques that distinguish the image of action, i.e., in this case, a way to overcome the conflict situation, the solution of the problem that led to the conflict. Consequently, the way to resolve conflicts lies through the same five ways mentioned in the previous section. At the same time, it is necessary to take into account a number of significant circumstances, which one way or another are reduced to the use of stimulating measures, including conviction and coercion.

First, the main task in resolving any conflict is to give it a functional and positive character possible, minimize the inevitable damage from the negative consequences of confrontation or acute confrontation. This result is achievable if the conflict participants will show an honest and friendly approach to the settlement of their disagreements, the overall interest in this if they enforce joint efforts to find a positive decision based on the sustainable, stable consent of all parties. At the same time, it is not at all necessary that the overall consent is unanimizing - the complete coincidence of the position of all participants in the conflict resolution process.

Secondly, a double outcome of a particular conflict is possible - its full or partial permission. In the first case, an exhaustive elimination of the reasons caused by a conflict situation is achieved, and during the second version there is a superficial weakening of disagreements, which over time can reveal themselves again. The measures taken are sent to convince or force the conflicting parties to stop hostile actions, exclude someone's defeat, indicate funds contributing to mutual understanding.

Third, a separate person or social group, correlating the interests of the conflicting parties and the parameters of their behavior, choose a priority method for resolving the conflict, the most accessible and acceptable in these conditions. It is necessary to understand that not every style, therefore, and the method is suitable for a specific situation. Each method is effective only when resolving a certain type of conflict.

The method of confrontation often elects participants in collective labor disputes, local and universal social conflicts. Often, they bring their disagreements with employers on social and labor problems to an extreme form - strike, putting the threat of tangible economic damage, as well as psychological pressure through rallies.

Collaboration is a very effective way to resolve conflicts in organizations, which allows, through open collective discussion, mutual agreement to meet the interests of the conflicting parties.

A widespread way to resolve conflicts is a compromise. The classic example of a compromise is the relationship of the seller and the buyer in the market - the result of the purchase and sale (mainly the price agreement) is the desired fruit of compromise, mutual concessions that arrange both sides.

At the same time, the constant appeal to compromise shows that there are no universal, only suitable funds that any method as a totality of receptions and rules has limitations depending on the situation, conflict participants and the tasks solved. Compromise themes and convenient that it does not oppose other ways to resolve conflicts, does not exclude their use on a par or in combination with them.

Fourth, the conflicting side can use non-one under certain conditions, but by two or three or in general by all ways to resolve the conflict. This circumstance also serves as a confirmation of the fact that none of the five styles of behavior in conflicts, the ways of their permission cannot be allocated, to recognize as the best and, accordingly, as the worst. The main thing is that it is necessary to gain a skill with benefit to apply any of the ways, consciously do one or another choice based on a particular conflict situation.

Description of the conflict situation

After work, the husband and wife return home. Everyone had a difficult day. Have dinner, drink tea. Question arises: Who washes the dishes? The husband suddenly recalls that there is a broken iron in the garage, and the wife urgently needs to wash underwear. The conflict is brewing: the wife recalls everything that she does while the husband sits and plays the computer, and the husband says that he does not make you go to his wife to dig a garden or screw the wheels to the car.

Wife chooses the style of permission of this conflict by leaving the conflict situation: it is better to wash the dishes for five minutes than half an hour to tell her husband as he himself is good. It would be possible, and find a compromise - now together my dishes, and then together we go to dig a garden. But in my case, it will take even more time than to explain to her husband as he himself is good. The resolution of the conflict situation depends on the characters of the parties. In this situation, the husband is an undoubted leader, since the wife elected such a style of behavior in conflict. Although, maybe they are both simply very tired, and no strength remains for the conflict.

Lecture No. 20. Basic interpersonal styles of conflict resolution

The main interpersonal styles of conflict resolution were developed K. Thomas . It indicates that there are 5 main styles of conflict behavior: adaptation, compromise, cooperation, evasion, rivalry (or competition).

The style of behavior in a specific conflict, he believes, is determined by the measure in which you want to satisfy your own interests, acting in passively or actively, and the interests of the other side, acting together or individually.

Competition style, rivalry It can use a person who has a strong will, sufficient authority, power, not very interested in cooperation with the other party and seeming primarily to satisfy its own interests. It can be used if:

1) The outcome of the conflict is very important for you and you make a big bet on your solution that has arisen;

3) Feel that you have no choice and you have nothing to lose;

4) must adopt a unpopular solution and you have enough authority to select this step;

5) interact with subordinates who prefer authoritarian style.

However, it should be borne in mind that this is not the style that needs to be used in close personal relationships, since, besides a sense of alienation, he can no longer cause anything. It is also inappropriate to use in a situation where you do not have enough power, and your point of view on some question is dispelled with the point of view of the chief.

Style cooperation You can use if, defending your own interests, you are forced to take into account the needs and desires of the other party. This style is most difficult, as it requires longer work. The purpose of its application is the development of a long-term mutually beneficial solution. Such a style requires the ability to explain your desires and listen to each other, restrain your emotions. The absence of one of the factors makes this style ineffective. To resolve the conflict, this style can be used in the following situations:

1) it is necessary to find a general solution if each of the approaches to the problem is important and does not allow compromises;

2) you have long, durable and interdependent relationships with the other side;

3) the main goal is to acquire joint work experience;

4) the parties are able to listen to each other and set out the essence of their interests;

5) the integration of points of view and strengthen the personal involvement of employees in activities. Compromise style. Its essence lies in the fact that the parties seek to resolve disagreements with mutual concessions. In this regard, he somewhat resembles the style of cooperation, but is carried out on a more superficial level, since the parties inferior to each other. This style is most effective if both sides want the same, but they know that it is simultaneously impracticable (for example, the desire to occupy one and the same post or the same room for work). When using this style, the focus is on the solution, which can be expressed by the words: "We cannot fully fulfill our desires, therefore, it is necessary to come to a solution with which each of us could agree."

Such an approach to conflict resolution can be used in the following situations:

1) both sides have equally convincing arguments and possess the same power;

2) the satisfaction of your desire is not very important for you;

3) You can arrange a temporary solution, since there is no time to generate another, or other approaches to solving the problem turned out to be ineffective;

4) Compromise will allow you to receive at least something than to lose everything.

Eviation style It is usually implemented when an affected problem is not so important for you, you do not defend your rights, do not cooperate with anyone to develop a solution and do not want to spend time and strength at this time. This style is also recommended in cases where one of the parties has a greater power or feels that not right, or believes that there is no serious grounds for continuing contacts.

1) the source of disagreements is trivial and is insignificant for you compared to other more important tasks, and therefore you think that you should not spend strength on it;

2) you know that you can not or do not even want to solve the issue in your favor;

3) you have little power to solve the problem with the way for you;

4) Want to win time to study the situation and get additional information before making any decision;

5) Trying to solve the problem immediately - dangerous, as the autopsy and open discussion of the conflict can only worsen the situation;

6) subordinates themselves can successfully resolve the conflict;

7) You had a difficult day, and the solution to this problem can bring additional troubles.

It should not be thought that this style is a flight from a problem or evasion of responsibility. In fact, care or delay can be quite a suitable response to a conflict situation, since during this time it can be resolved by itself or you can do it later when you have sufficient information and the desire to resolve it.

Style devices This means that you act together with the other side, but at the same time you do not try to defend your own interests in order to smooth the atmosphere. K. Thomas believes that this style is most effective when the outcome of the case is extremely important for the other side and is not very significant for you or when you sacrifice your own interests in favor of the other side.

The adaptation style can be applied in the following most characteristic situations:

1) the most important task is to restore calm and stability, and not the resolution of the conflict;

2) The subject of disagreement is not important for you or you are not particularly worried about what happened;

4) Aware that the truth is not on your side;

5) Feel that you are not enough power or chances to win.

In the same way, as no leadership style can be effective in all situations without exception, and none of the considered conflict resolution styles can not be allocated as the best. It is necessary to learn to effectively use each of them and consciously do one or another choice, given the specific circumstances.

Despite the fact that the relationship with other people should contribute to the world and harmony, conflicts are inevitable. Each sensible person must have the ability to effectively settle disputes and disagreements, so that the fabric of social life does not rush with each conflict, and, on the contrary, fastened due to the ability to find and develop common interests.

To resolve the conflict, it is important to have different approaches at your disposal, be able to use them flexibly, go beyond the limits of the usual schemes and to respond to the possibilities, to do and think in a new way. At the same time, you can use the conflict as a source of life experience, self-education and self-education.

Conflicts can be turned into a wonderful training material if you find the time to remember what led to a conflict and what happened in a conflict situation. Then you can learn more about yourself, about people involved in conflict or about the circumstances that contributed to the emergence of conflict. This knowledge will help make the right decision and avoid conflict in the future.

To successfully resolve the conflict, ultimately it is necessary that both parties have shown to allow it. But if the desire is shown at least one side, then it will give the other side more opportunities for the oncoming step. In conflicts, people seem to be mutual resentment, complaints and other negative emotions. Make the first step towards resolving the conflict is quite difficult: everyone believes that it should give the other. Therefore, the readiness to resolve the conflict shown by one side can play a decisive role in resolving it in general.

Basic styles of behavior in resolving conflicts

Famous experts in the field of management psychology K. Thomas and Kilman allocate five major styles of behavior in conflict situations based on their own style, the style of other conflict participants, as well as the type of conflict itself. Graphically, this classification is represented in the Thomas-Kilmen grid (Fig. 60). It is widely used in training managerial programs and allows us to work out for each head their own conflict resolution style.

The style of behavior in each specific conflict is determined by the degree of desire to satisfy their own interests (acting passively or actively) and the interests of the opposite side of the conflict participants (acting together or individually).

If your reaction is passive, then you will seek to get out of the conflict; If the reaction is active, then you will try to resolve it. The desire for joint actions causes an attempt to solve this conflict along with his other participants. The desire for individual actions causes the way to solve the problem or evasion from its solution. Five styles of behavior are highlighted equally include joint and individual actions, as well as passive and active behavior.

The one who uses the style of competition is always active and seeks to solve the conflict in its own way. It

Fig. 60. B. Mesh Thomas-Kilmen

not interested in cooperation with others, but is capable of volitional solutions, seeks primarily to satisfy its own interests at the expense of others, imposing its decision. This path is effective when a person has a certain power. But this is an extremely inefficient method of solving personal conflicts. Competition style causes in other sense of alienation. The use of it in situations where the subject does not have power, can lead to annoying errors.

The use of this style makes sense if the result is very important for you if you have a certain authority and consider your option the best if the decision must be taken urgently and there is enough power for it, if there is no other way and there is nothing to lose, if you can't convince the group that The situation is crisis, but the group must be later

This style will recognize if a positive result is reached. But if the desire to establish a good relationship with all, then such a style should not be applied.

Evasion style is used in situations when the position is unstable and there is no cooperation with others to solve the problem. This style is advisable to apply if the problem is not very important or when the erroneousness of its own position and the correctness of the position of the other side of the conflict, when the forces are not equal or when the other is endowed with power. In these cases, the desire to satisfy their own or other interests is characterized by care from the problem, shifting responsibility for the decision on others, the desire to postpone the solution or use other means.

Evasion style is used if communication with a mentally complex person occurs and if there is no reason to support contacts with it, as well as attempts to make a decision in a situation where it is not entirely clear that it is necessary to specifically do, but there is no need for this. This strategy is advisable and in cases of lack of sufficient information. Although some consider this style "escape" from problems and responsibility, such behavior can be a completely constructive response to a conflict situation.

The style of fixtures means that you act with another person, not trying to defend your own interests. This style is applied if the results are very important for another person and are not very significant for you. It is useful in situations in which you can win, because another conflict participant has power. So you are inferior and do what the opponent wishes. You act in such a style and then when sympathize with another person and try to support it.

As, applying such a strategy, you move your interests, it is better to resort to it when a positive clarification of the situation is not significant for you or when participation in the situation is not very significant. If you think that you are inferior in something very important and feel dissatisfaction in this regard, the method of adaptation in this case does not fit. It is not acceptable and then when you feel that another person is not going to come true something or will not appreciate your contribution to solving the problem. This style needs to be used when you, retreating, do not lose little when you are going to soften the situation, and then return to this question and defend your position.

Style of fixtures can remind a little dodge style if you use it as a means of delaying a problem solving. But the main difference is that you act with another person, you do what he seeks. Landing, you can soften the conflict situation and establish relationships.

Thanks to the style of cooperation, you can take an active part in resolving the conflict and protect your own interests, but to strive to cooperate with other conflict participants. This style requires greater internal work compared to other strategies. First you need to reveal aspirations, goals, interests of both sides, and then discuss them. If you have time and the solution is of great importance, this is a good way to get the most effective result and the satisfaction of mutual interests.

This style is the most optimal when both sides have various hidden aspirations. In this case, it is difficult to determine the factor of dissatisfaction. At first, it seems that both parties want the same, or, on the contrary, have opposite goals, which is the direct conflict factor. But there is a distinction between external manifestations and hidden interests and aspirations that are true causes of a conflict situation.

So, in order to successfully use the style of cooperation, it is necessary to spend a certain time for the search for internal, hidden interests to develop a means of meeting the true desires of both parties. If both parties understand what causes the cause of the conflict, they have the opportunity to look for new means of solving it. However, this path requires certain efforts. Both sides should spend on this certain time, find out their real desires, listen to each other and finally work out the solution solutions. The style of cooperation is the most difficult, but very effective.

The essence of the style of the compromise is to partially satisfy your own interests. You are partially inferior to other participants, but they do the same. Such actions can resemble cooperation, but the satisfaction of mutual needs occurs at the surface level. Hidden, internal needs are not analyzed here.

The compromise style is most effective when both sides want the same, although they understand that simultaneously satisfy their interests are impossible. The most common cases of its application: both sides have the same power and opposite interests; It is necessary to quickly achieve a solution and there is no time for discussion; arrange a temporary solution; other ways are ineffective; Compromise allows you to maintain normal relationships.

It is important to understand that each of these styles is effective only under certain conditions. We must be able to adequately use each of them and make a conscious choice, given the specific circumstances. The best approach is determined by a specific situation.

Questions for self-test

1. What are the main stages of the socialization process?

2. What is the effect of socialization?

3. Describe the concept of social installation, its functions.

4. Analyze the interpersonal relationship as the basis for the socialization of the person.

5. What are the psychological mechanisms of interpersonal relationships?

6. Which have dropped small social groups?

7. What are the main functions of communication?

8. What is the structure of business communication? 9 - What is the essence of cognitive aspects of communication?

10. Describe the factors affecting the socio-psychological climate.

11. What is the essence of the concepts of "empathy" and "reflexion"?

12. Analyze the ways to solve conflict situations.

1 Andreeva G. M. Social Psychology. Moscow, 1980.

2. Atvater I. I listen to you. Tips to the head how to listen to the interlocutor correctly. Moscow, 1988.

3 Bodaliev A. A. Perception and understanding of man by man. Moscow, 1982.

4. V. V. Boyko et al. Socio-psychological climate of the collective and personality / U. V. Boyko, A. G. Kovalev, V. H. Panferov. Moscow, 1983.

5. KazMirenko V.P. Social Psychology of Organizations. Klev, 1993.

6. Kornev M. N., Kovalenko A.. Social Psychology. Kiev, 199s.

7. A brief dictionary of sociology / under total. Red.- D. \u200b\u200bM. Gwi-Shiani, H. s. Lapin. Moscow, 1988.

8. Lomov B. F. Methodological and theoretical problems of psychological. Moscow, 1984.

9. MICICH P. How does business conversations / Sopr. Per. With Serb.-Horv. 2nd ed., Ched. Moscow, 1987.

10. Oboozov N. Psychology of interpersonal relationships. Kiev, 1990.

11. Panferov V.N. Cognitive standards and stereotypes of interaction // Vopr. Psychology. 1982. N "S.

12. Papilean S.S. Study of the "organizational climate" in American psychology // Vopr. psychology. 1978. No. 2.

13. Petrovskaya L. A. On the conceptual scheme of socio-psychological analysis of the conflict // Theoretical and methodological problems of social psychology / ed. G. M. Andreva and N. H. Bogomolova. Moscow, 1977.

14. Petrovsky A. V., Shpalinsky V. V. Social psychology of the team. Moscow, 1978.

15. Psychological Dictionary / Ed. V. V. Davydova, A. V. Zaporozhtsya, would. F. Lomova and others Moscow, 1983.

16. Psychology: Dictionary / under the common. ed. A. V. Petrovsky, Mg Yaroshevsky. 2nd ed. I am add. Moscow, 1990.

17 Svenzitsky A. L. Social Psychology of Management / Ed. E with Kuzmina. Leningrad, 1986.

18. Scott J. Mr. Conflicts I am on their overcoming. Klev, 1991.

IV. Social Psychology. History, theory, empirical studies / ed. E. S. Kuzmina, V. E. Semenova. Leningrad, 1979.

20. Philosophical Encyclopedia. Moscow, 1970. t. 5.

21. Yusupov s. M. Psychology of mutual understanding. Kazan, 1991.

Conflict resolution styles

CONFLICT. Conflict resolution styles

The conflict is a phenomenon resulting from the collision of opposite actions, views, interests, aspirations, plans of various people or motives, the needs of one person. In the latter case, they talk about the internal conflict.

In general, conflicts are a natural part of our life. They can expect us when meeting with a new person or a new situation. To some extent, they are even necessary for the development of the situation and relationships, for the growth of the person, otherwise it may be stagnant. Although most often a conflict situation we are experiencing as a serious trouble.

Basic conflict resolution styles

In conflict situations, people consciously or subconsciously usually choose some particular behavior style. In a specific conflict, behavior is determined by how important it is to satisfy your own interests (acting passively or actively) and the interests of the other side (acting together or individually).

There are five basic conflict resolution styles.

1. Competition style is preferred when:

• a person who uses this style is very active and prefers to go to resolve conflict in its own way. He is not interested in cooperation with other people, but it is capable of volitional solutions.
• when you have a certain power, we are confident that your decision or approach in this situation is correct and have the opportunity to insist on your own.

Competition style is preferred when:

• exodus is very important for you, and you make a big bet on permitting the problem;
• the decision must be taken quickly and you have enough power for this;
• you feel that you have no other choice and you have nothing to lose.

2. Evasion style is preferred when:

• a person does not defend his rights, does not want to cooperate to develop a problem or simply leaves the resolution of the conflict;
• the affected problem is not so important for you, and you do not want to spend the forces on her decision;
• you feel that you are in a hopeless position.
• you feel wrong and anticipate the rightness of another person, and when this person has a greater power, or you have no serious grounds for continuing relationships with this person. Maybe you are at the moment you need a delay - time to think about the situation or calm down?

3. Device style is preferable when:

• a person acts together with a partner for communicating, not trying to defend its own interests;
• the outcome of the case is extremely important for another person and is not very exist for you;
• you can't win, because another person has a greater power. You can resort to such a strategy if at the moment you need to slightly mitigate the situation, and then you intend to return to this issue and to defend your position;
• you feel more important to keep with someone good relationships than to defend your interests.

4. Cooperation style is preferred when:

• the person actively participates in the resolution of the conflict and defends its position, but it tries to take into account the interests of the other party. This style requires longer work compared to other approaches to the conflict, because first openly declare the needs, concerns and interests of both parties ("laid out on the table"), and then discuss them.
• it is advisable to use this style, if the solution to the problem is very important for both sides, and no one wants to resolve from the decision;
• if you have close prolonged and interdependent relationships with the other side, and you both are able to set out the essence of our interests and listen to each other;
• if both parties involved in the conflict have equal power or do not notice the difference in the position in order to look for a solution to the problem.

5. Compromise style is preferred when:

• people converge on partial satisfaction of the desires and interests of each conflicting party;
• you and other people want the same, but you know that at the same time it is impracticable for you;
• you want to come to the solution quickly, you can arrange a temporary solution, you are ready to change the initial goal. Compromise will allow you to save good relationships.

You saw that some one or two styles are preferred for you. This is natural, but hard preference can limit your capabilities. You need to learn to effectively use each of the styles and consciously do one or another choice, given the specific circumstances.

What behavior in a conflict situation will be the most advantageous?

1. Dynamics of conflict. Conflict is a conscious contradiction between people, which requires permission. The conflict is not always effective by resolving contradictions, because due to the emerging strengths of strong emotions, thinking is slowed down, the perception is narrowed, more primitive psyche layers are updated. And yet, if there is no choice, there is no choice, and the conflict seems to be the only available way to resolve contradiction, it should be initiated by the initiator of the conflict, since with a conscious entry into conflict the ability to control it much higher. It should be remembered that "in large doses conflict is harmful to health."

2. Constructive conflict resolution. For constructive resolution of conflict situations, follow the following recommendations: in conflict there are no winners: always lose two sides. Therefore, it makes no sense to calculate who is to blame for more, and hold the pose of "offended pride." Daily at the first step - this is an indicator of the strength of your character and your self-esteem. Start a conversation with the description of a specific situation that does not suit you. Try to be as objective as possible. The more details you will talk about it, the better. If this is probably given specific examples.

Tell us what you feel in this situation. Many conflicts between people are complicated by the presence of unspoken thoughts and feelings. Sometimes the alone of their statement, the exchange of these negative feelings allow you to establish the situation. At the same time, use simple words: "I was offended," "I was frightened," "I was angry."

Try to listen to the opposite direction (although it is quite difficult). It must be remembered that you have different thoughts, a different perception of the situation and this is what caused a conflict. Therefore, we assume to expressed not as truth, but as a reflection of the position, desires and interests of your opponent.

Listen carefully, do not interrupt, do not argue. Show the interlocutor that you are listening to him really seriously and strive to come to the agreement. It is possible to emphasize this and approving a nod of the head, a request to bring a specific example, which will help you better understand the feelings and actions of the opposite side, and your interlocutor is to tune in to a frank conversation.

If the conflict is very serious, contact a "outsiders" to a person who would help you listen to each other without moving on mutual reproaches and accusations.

It is very useful to understand the innermost thoughts. The innermost thoughts are assumptions, concerns, guesses regarding the feelings and thoughts of the other. To make sure the correctness of your assumptions is best to ask the person himself. If you are asked about this, try to be quite frank, because guesses, as a rule, have real soil. Refrain from comment, completing any conversation. Accent attention on questions regarding which your thoughts, feelings, actions coincide, and not on the problems that share, "you limit the contradictions zone.

Find the opportunity to express specific suggestions regarding the change of the situation, behavior, relationships ("I ask you.", "I would like." I hope you are not hard. "). At the end of the conversation, tell me what exactly will change if you convert the situation or your relationship. It is impractical to threaten and resort to ultimatums - because positive prospects are attractive. Note that a person will win if you change your behavior or attitude at your request. This method of resolution of the conflict requires a certain determination. However, if you are frank and honest in this conversation, your relationship will not deteriorate, and you will cause more respect.

3. Principles of conflict management.

Psychologists believe that conflict is quite possible to manage. The principles of conflict management are as follows:

1. Determination of the need to exacerbate the conflict, which is achieved through an honest and impartial response to the following questions (these answers can be given out loud or record, they cannot be discussed):

a) Is it possible and desired by the elimination of contradiction (as is known, the contradiction is the engine of progress)? b) If so, then there are more peaceful, economical and "clean" paths of its permission? c) if not, will you have enough strength to win the conflict? d) if not, then - how long can it last (this is necessary to know in order to get out of the conflict with the minimum consumption of spiritual and physical forces)?

2. Full control over your own emotions, which, as a rule, interfere with, evaluating what is happening.

3. Analysis of genuine causes of conflict that opponents can hide for reasons with imaginary.

4. Localization of the conflict, i.e., the establishment of its clear framework and the maximum desire to narrow the contradiction area.

5. Refusal to concentrate on self-defense, since the passion for its own protective actions usually interferes with people while noticeing changes in the situation and the behavior of Natural Party.

6. Reformulation of the arguments of the opponent, which simply should not be refuted in the order and in the proportions in which they are set out - it is better to try to "translate" them to your understandable language, highlighting the supporting semantic moments.

7. Sufficient activity, since, even "retreating throughout the front", you can save the initiative by asking:

a) the emotional tone of relationships ("Let's talk quietly"); b) the topic of the conversation ("We are not talking about that, back - ka to."); c) language style (without rudeness and vulgarity); d) the roles and degree of rigor of the rules of the game (one can also play conflict, solving contradictions, in the form of the likeness of theatrical action with stipulated roles and the role).

4. Control of emotions. Very important and, perhaps, the most difficult is the second of these principles - control of emotions.

It happens that someone specifically "turns" us in order to engage in conflict. It is very difficult to stay calm when there are groundless charges, or you are insulted, or they are impossible, from your point of view, requirements and claims.

It is especially important that your emotions do not interfere with you try to understand what makes a person act in this way. If you find yourself in a situation in which someone begins to show my emotions too much, then this is usually suggesting that the conflict is caused by some deep interests that you need to take into account to find a solution to the problem and restore the relationship.

In particular, you can keep the following action program in memory:

• If a person's response is too different from the one that could be expected in the current situation, stop and think: what are the deep problems or needs it can reflect?
• Try to get up to the position of another person and take a look at things with his eyes: what can he think about the current situation?
• Look at your behavior from the point of view of another person. Doesn't you do something that is unpleasant or not clear? It is especially important to practice this in order to reduce the heat of flared conflicts with parents. (If, for example, they limit your freedom and constantly "saw" you for later returning home, try to look at your behavior of their eyes. And you will find a whole "bouquet" of the reasons for their irritation: and the feeling that you neglect the care of parents, and Fear for you, and insult, and fear of losing control over the situation.)
• Think if this person is experiencing this person now the pressure of some circumstances that could cause such a reaction?
• Think about how to unobtrusively offer a discussion of real causes of conflict.
• Demonstrate that susceptible to the needs of another person, that you show care of it; Show that you are ready to spend time to understand it.
• Be prepared to postpone your own interests in order to be able to focus on the needs of another person. You can take care of your interests later, and now it is important to show a person that you recognize his needs and are ready to do everything from you depends to satisfy them, because you see how it is not easy for him.

To follow these recommendations is not so easy, because instead of the position of natural egoism, you need to learn to occupy "Meta-position": be as it were within the situation, and outside it; Separate your interests, your point of view, your experience from what is happening with another person, and take his interests and needs as an objective reality regardless of your attitude towards this.

You can take care of your interests later, and now it is important to show a person that you recognize his needs and are ready to do everything from you depends to satisfy them, because you see how it is not easy for him. Follow these recommendations is not so easy, you need to separate your interests, your point of view, your experience from what is happening with another person, and take his interests and needs as an objective reality regardless of your attitude towards this.

Conflict resolution styles

Prepared: Mishina Ilona

. There is no conflict-free personal relationship. Conflicts are inevitable in any respects between people.

Your behavior style in a particular conflict is determined by the measure in which you want to satisfy your own interests (acting passively or actively) and

the interests of the other side (acting together or individually).

He is not very interested in collaboration with other people, but it is capable of volitional solutions. Rationalist can say: "It does not bother me that

think others. I'm going to prove to them that I have my own solution to the problem. "In the first place

a person wants to satisfy his own interests to the detriment of the interests of others, forcing other people.

take your solution to the problem. To achieve the goal, it uses its own volitional qualities; And if the will of the person is strong enough, then it can be.

This style is implemented when you do not defend your

rights, do not cooperate with anyone to develop a problem or simply evade the resolution of the conflict. You can

use this style when the affected problem is not so important for you when you don't want to spend the strength on her decision or when you

feel what are in a hopeless position. This style

i'm not going to do it now. " In short, you do not attempt to satisfy your own interests or interests of another person. Instead, you leave the problem, ignoring it, shifting responsibility for its solution to another, seeking deferring solutions or using other techniques.

Devices style:

He means that you act together with another person, not trying to defend your own interests. You

you can use this approach when the outcome of the case is extremely important for another person and is not very significant for you. This style is also useful in those situations in which you can not win, since another person has a greater power; Thus, you are inferior and humble with what opponent wants. You act in such a style when you donate your interests in favor of another person, giving him and regret it. it

allows you to feel comfortable in relation to the desires of another person. This style should be used.

then when you feel that, a little yielding, you lose little.

Cooperation style:

Following this style, you are actively involved in the resolution

conflict and defend their interests, but try to cooperate with another person. This style requires more

long work compared to most of the other approaches to the conflict, as you first lay out on the table, the needs, concerns and interests of both sides, and then discuss them. However, if you have time and solving the problem has a rather important value for you, this is a good way to search for a mutually beneficial result and satisfy the interests of all

This style is especially effective when the parties have various hidden needs. The same cooperation encourages

every person to open discussion of his needs and desires.

You are a little inferior in your interests to satisfy them in the rest, the other side does the same

most. In other words, you converge on partial satisfaction

his desire and partial fulfillment of the desire of another person. Compromise style is most effective in cases where you and

another person want the same thing, but you know that at the same time it is impracticable for you. For example, you both want

to take one position or, being on vacation together, you want to spend it differently. Consequently, you produce some compromise based on minor mutual concessions. For example, in the case of a joint vacation, you can negotiate

as follows: "Well, we will spend some of the holidays in the mountains, and the part is on the seashore." Compromise is often successful

retreat or even the last opportunity to come to some decision

The main styles of relations between people in resolving conflicts

This type of conflict may be the most common. Interpersonal conflicts can be viewed as a clash of personalities in the process of their relationship. Such collisions can occur in a wide variety of spheres and areas (economic, political, production, socio-cultural, household, etc.). "Most often, he arises due to the deficiency of any resources, for example, the presence of one prestigious vacancy with several candidates for it."

"Under the interpersonal conflict understands an open clash of interacting actors based on arising contradictions, acting in the form of opposing purposes that are not compatible in some particular situation. The interpersonal conflict is manifested in the interaction between two and more persons. In interpersonal conflicts, subjects confront each other and find out their relationship directly, face to face. "

Interpersonal conflicts arise both between those who first found themselves and between constantly communicating people. In both cases, the personal perception of a partner or opponent plays an important role in the relationship. An obstacle to finding the consent between individuals can be a negative installation that has formed from one opponent in relation to the other. Installation is a readiness, the predisposition of the subject to act in a certain way. This is a certain focus of the manifestation of the psyche and behavior of the subject, readiness to perceive future events. It is formed under the influence of rumors, opinions, judgments about this individual (group, phenomenon, etc.).

Interacting with other people, a person protects primarily his personal interests, and this is normal. The conflicts arising at the same time are a reaction to obstacles to achieving goals. And on how important the subject of conflict is presented for a particular individual, its conflict installation will also depend.

Individuals face interpersonal conflicts, protecting not only their personal interests. They may also represent the interests of individual groups, institutions, organizations, labor collectives, society as a whole. In such interpersonal conflicts, the struggle and the possibilities of finding compromises are largely determined by conflict plants of those social groups whose representatives are opponents.

"All interpersonal conflicts arising from the collision of goals and interests can be divided into three main species.

The first - suggests a fundamental collision, in which the implementation of the goals and interests of one opponent can be achieved only by infringement of the interests of the other.

The second - affects only the form of relations between people, but does not infringe upon, their spiritual, moral and material needs and interests.

The third - represents imaginary contradictions that may be provoked by either false (distorted) information or incorrect interpretation of events and facts. "

"Interpersonal conflicts can also be divided into the following types: