If a person never makes eye contact. Possible reasons why a person does not look into the eyes - complexes

The buildings 30.09.2019

The buildings

8.11.2017 // Tatyana

When a person does not make eye contact during communication, there is often a feeling of understatement, as if he is hiding something. And usually this intuitive feeling does not deceive.

When a teenager does not make eye contact

When it comes to children, especially adolescents, this situation often arises. Parents begin to notice that a daughter or son avoids a direct look when talking, looking away or lowering them "to the floor." When asked directly, children respond that it is uncomfortable for them to look into the eyes. Why is this happening?

Usually such behavior is preceded by some kind of event, especially if the child previously calmly looked into the eyes, and then suddenly began to experience awkwardness at visual contact. Think what it could be.

Specifically, in adolescence, this phenomenon can be many individual reasons or a whole complex of them.

During this period of time, adolescents have their first loves, the body changes, “hormones play” - as if the whole world is changing around, and they do not know how to hide it and how to adapt themselves to numerous changes. Here it is important to give time to recover - by the age of 16-17, the child adapts to his new state and learns to communicate adequately.

When an adult does not make eye contact

When an adult avoids looking into your eyes - either he does not want to see something in you, or does not want to show something in himself, he is uncomfortable, because a huge flow of information goes through his eyes.

Maybe at this moment he is experiencing emotions that he does not want to share with you for some reason. For example, he may be angry with you or jealous of you.

No wonder they say that the eyes are the mirror of the soul, sometimes they can tell the observer more than their owner would like.

When talking with a friend or girlfriend, looking away, a person may try to maintain their personal boundaries, it is uncomfortable for him to open up completely. At some moments, he may feel emotions that he would like to contain and, avoiding a direct look, he tries to do this.

Attempts to put accents on the face (glasses, beard, long bangs, cap pulled low) are also a way to divert attention from direct visual contact, a preference to remain more autonomous, secluded, protected.

What to do if a person does not make eye contact?

Do not support him in this game, do not look away in response, behave as always. Don't push him, he's uncomfortable. Most likely, something in your behavior causes an attempt to isolate yourself - perhaps you are asking unwanted questions that can be unpleasant, too formal and intrusive for the interlocutor. Turn your attention to yourself, learn to talk about your thoughts and feelings.

Other reasons why a person avoids making eye contact

Other reasons in one way or another intersect with the above:

Feelings of insecurity

When communicating, a person behaves nervously - sorts out something, constantly touches his hair, experiences emotional excitement. Usually he does not look you in the eye because he does not know if he is behaving correctly in this situation.

shyness

An attempt to hide their feelings is characteristic of shy people, so the person does not look into the eyes.

Irritation

Prolonged eye contact often causes irritation - it begins to seem to the interlocutor that you are trying to unravel all his secrets,

piercing gaze

It is unpleasant for the owner of a heavy gaze to look into the eyes, as this causes discomfort

Not interested

Sometimes avoiding eye contact means that the interlocutor is simply not interested. This can be confirmed by yawning, frequent glancing at the clock, inventing excuses to stop communication.

Lots of information at once

A look conveys a lot of information about another person, in order to assimilate it, you need to look away for a while.

psifak.com

Reasons why a person looks away

Many believe that they do not look in the eyes when they are deceiving. Psychologists refute this and assure that there are many reasons why during a conversation a person does not look into the eyes of another. Why doesn't the person make eye contact?

During the experiments, it turned out that in one second, when people look into each other's eyes, they are able to get the amount of information, as well as in 3 hours of active communication. Therefore, constantly looking into the eyes of the interlocutor is not easy, and the person has to look away.

In addition, it has been proven that if people constantly look into each other's eyes, then this annoys them very much. In this case, it seems to a person that they are trying to read or calculate him. And nobody likes it.

In some cases, when talking, looking away is considered a sign of shyness - this is scientifically confirmed. A look gives out an attitude towards an object: interest, love or interest - all this makes the eyes look special. Therefore, if a person does not want you to see his feelings right now, then he looks away.

It is hard to look into the eyes of a person who has a heavy look. Already in the first seconds of communication with such a person it becomes uncomfortable, uncomfortable and even unpleasant. Such a look puts pressure on morale and you have to look away.

Why they don't look into your eyes

Another reason why people don't make eye contact is their lack of self-confidence. A person gives out emotional excitement if, in the process of talking, he: sorts something in his hands, pulls at the tip of his nose, ears or hair. Also, he will avoid direct eye contact, because he does not know which look is most appropriate for him to “send” to you.

Why a person does not look into the eyes - often a person does not want to look into the eyes of the interlocutor just because he is not interested in him. In addition to the averted gaze, disinterest is manifested by additional signs: glancing at the clock, yawning, interrupting the conversation under any pretext, etc.

In order not to have problems in communication, you can practice not looking away when talking. Then it will be easier for you to make new friends or build any relationship with people.

8 exercises that will teach you to look the interlocutor in the eye when talking

It is said that "The eyes are the mirror of the soul." In the eyes, you can read all the emotions experienced by a person: joy, sadness, boredom, resentment, irritation, anger, etc.

The eyes are the window to him inner world, the key to knowing its inner essence. “Oh, the eyes are a significant thing,” the dog Sharik thought in Mikhail Bulgakov’s Heart of a Dog. “Like a barometer. Everything is visible - who has a great dryness in his soul, who for no reason can poke the toe of his boot into the ribs, and who himself is afraid of everyone.

“Empty eyes - an empty soul,” said the famous director Konstantin Stanislavsky.

You can deceive with words, facial expressions, but not with a look. “When the eyes say one thing and the tongue another, the experienced person believes more first,” wrote the American philosopher Ralph Emerson.

“Look me in the eyes!” we say when we want to understand whether they are lying to us or telling the truth. - "I can see in your eyes that you're lying!"

Why don't people make eye contact?

So, if our interlocutor avoids looking into our eyes, and his gaze is directed somewhere to the side, through us or at the floor, it means that he either does not want to give out his true feelings, or is afraid to read something undesirable for himself in our eyes. . Maybe he is jealous of us, angry with us, dislikes us, in love, indifferent, annoyed and intends to hide it, therefore he does not want to meet our eyes, because then we will understand everything.

Avoid looking into the eyes of people with low self-esteem, insecure, internally weak. The fear of looking people in the eye when talking is one of the signs of social phobia.

Psychologists explain such fear by the unwillingness to be at the mercy of an unfamiliar person, fear that he will crush them with his will. Looking away, they seem to be protected, less nervous, feel more comfortable. When communicating with people they know well, from whom they know what to expect, they do not have such a problem as the fear of looking into the eyes.

Just keep your eyes peeled...

There is an opinion that only a person with a strong character can withstand someone else's gaze and not look away. “And there was no person in the Universe who could withstand the gaze of Solomon without downcasting his eyes!” Alexander Kuprin writes about the wise King Solomon in the story “Shulamith”.

People on a subconscious level obey someone's inner personal power. We can say that we were convinced, persuaded, argued, but in fact we were affected by the psychological power of another person. And most clearly it manifests itself in his hard look. This look is also called magnetic, hypnotic. Its owner can influence and manipulate people.

Some representatives of the animal world, for example, tigers, are measured by the power of their gaze. So they figure out who has more rights to the best place under the sun. The one who first averted his eyes lost, which means he must give in.

The same thing happens in human society: one who is in conflict situation hides his eyes, looks away, will be considered a weakling, which means that he will not have a chance to win. A person with a shifty look also makes a miserable impression. "Slippery type" - they will say about him and prefer not to deal with him. A person who does not know how to "keep a look" is unlikely to be sent to serious business negotiations, because they negotiate with the strong. The weak are ordered and dictated conditions.

But one should not forget about the measure. A long stare can make someone neurotic. And too persistent - to suspect the interlocutor of unseemly intentions. If we suddenly notice that the interlocutor is uncomfortable under our gaze, perhaps we have it too heavy, prickly, unfriendly.

According to psychologists, it is enough to look into the eyes for about 70% of the time of communication.

In some countries, such as Muslim countries, it is considered indecent if a woman looks into the eyes of a man or an elderly person. This is regarded as a sign of disrespect.

Learning to look into the eyes

How to look into the eyes so that the interlocutor does not have the feeling that we are staring at him? How not to seem arrogant, unceremonious and not run into the question: “What are you staring at”?

When we talk about a “strong” look, we mean that it is a look that is direct, open, energetic and friendly, and not at all aggressive and domineering. Therefore, in order to "enter the role", it is worth imagining that our interlocutor is now the most important person for us. You can mentally straighten his hair, imagine him in other clothes, stroke him on the shoulder or arm. Thanks to this reception, our gaze will acquire benevolence and warmth.

It is worth developing empathy in yourself - the ability to feel into the state of the interlocutor. Let's try on his gestures, facial expressions, look. This will make it possible to feel on the same wavelength with him, will cause a feeling of unity, and then it will be easy for us to look him straight in the eye.

You can also come across such advice: look to the interlocutor at the bridge of the nose or at the place where the so-called “third eye” is located. This is wrong, say some psychologists. By focusing only on these points, we will lose sight of the entire face. To prevent this from happening, our gaze must be wide, unfocused. For example, the same experienced driver, carefully watching the road, sees it as a whole, and does not concentrate on individual elements.

Visual acuity exercises

Draw a black dot on a white piece of paper and attach it to the wall. The dot should be at eye level. We will sit one and a half meters from the wall and look at the point. We begin to make circular movements with our heads, keeping our eyes on the black dot. We gradually increase the speed of rotation and the radius of the circle. Exercise time: start with one and gradually increase to ten minutes.
For a minute, we observe the black dot, and then we move our eyes up and down, left and right. We draw circles, zigzags and others with our eyes geometric figures. This exercise develops and strengthens the eye muscles. Exercise time: 1-10 minutes.
We look at the black dot and turn our head (only the head, not the body) either to the right or to the left, without taking our eyes off the point. We do 1-10 minutes.

Watch without blinking

For a month, we perform these exercises that train the eye muscles, and move on to exercises that will teach us long time watch without blinking.

We concentrate our eyes on the same black dot. We look at it without blinking, 1-10 minutes.
We look closely at the same point, and then fix our eyes on some point on the ceiling. After 5 minutes, we look down at the same point on the floor and focus on it for the next 5 minutes. We translate only our eyes, we do not tilt our heads.

Insightful eye exercises

And the following 3 exercises develop a firm, penetrating gaze:

We sit down in front of the mirror, mentally draw a dot on our bridge of the nose and look at it, trying not to blink. We start with one minute and gradually bring the exercise time to 15. You can work out a firm, unblinking look by looking into the eyes of a stranger when we are, for example, in transport, and he is standing at a bus stop. This option is suitable for those who are not embarrassed by awkward situations.
We carefully examine in the mirror for 5 minutes, first our left pupil, then the same amount of right. We look carefully, as if we want to see our brain through the pupil.
We train in front of a mirror to express different emotions with a look (not facial expressions): friendly disposition, threat, confidence, calmness, joy, etc.

Source

Read also:

www.selfcreation.ru

Why does a man avoid making eye contact?

Why does a man who really likes not look me in the eye when talking? After all, you really want to read in his eyes the whole truth about feelings or their absence, finally!

This question is asked by a woman more than once. There is an intuition, a sixth sense that this man likes me. But life experience says that girls often tend to wishful thinking. So, I want concrete confirmation of my feeling. No one wants to be deceived in their own hopes!

No. This is not fiction, and at the first meeting we even had to sit and look into each other's eyes. I saw a clear curiosity about me as a woman, and not just a new acquaintance. And I was the first to get embarrassed and look away. But how I would like to see the answer to my question again.

Why doesn’t a man look into his eyes, takes them away at our random meetings and short conversations at the same time?

We read what psychologists and men and women themselves say about this, based on own experience.

Let's start with the stereotype that when a person does not look into the eyes of the interlocutor, it means that he is hiding something or wants to deceive. Here you can bring the opposite argument: it is the one who wants to deceive, and looks intently and for a long time into the eyes. And it's hard to argue with that.

There is an opinion that a man looks away because of his shyness. He is afraid that the woman will read his feelings for her.

He hides his gaze because, with his embarrassment, he wants to “prove” to you that it is not physical intimacy that is important for him, but the sincere feelings that arose between you. And there is no evil intention in this case.

He can hide his eyes if he has a wife, and he is interested in you.

How a man behaves with a woman depends on many aspects. And the most important is the psychotype of a person. There are people who, in principle, do not look eye to eye. There is even advice: look not into the eye, but into the region of the bridge of the nose or ear.

He is afraid to fall in love, so he looks away! This 100 percent verdict was made by the girl, relying on her life experience.

So why, you, a man, look away when talking with a woman you like?

i-magik.com

Psychologists say that a person who hides his eyes or looks away in a dialogue can be either a very modest person or a liar. And the truth is that the one whose eyes are "running around" gives the impression of a not too decent person. But people often do not like to look eye to eye, and this is not connected with thoughts of stealing or cheating something. Why do we look away? Do liars make eye contact? At modern science There are answers to these and other questions.

Eyes are the mirror of the soul

University of California experts believe that the quality of communication is 93% determined by non-verbal means. Body language, tonality, timbre of the voice and, of course, the expression of the eyes - all this helps to understand what a person really wants to say.

Other figures are given in a study led by Stephen Yanik and Rodney Wellens from the University of Miami in Florida: 44% of attention during communication is focused on the eyes and only 12% on the mouth. It is the eyes that are the “litmus test” of our emotions: they reflect fear, disappointment, bitterness, joy ... But then why do we look away so often?

Trying to focus

Psychologists Fiona Phelps and Gwyneth Doherty Sneddon, in their work The Look of Disgust, tried to determine the dependence of the duration of a look on the method of obtaining information and the level of its complexity. They conducted an experiment in which two groups of 8-year-old children were asked easy and difficult questions, while the first received information on a face-to-face basis, and the second received information through a video monitor.

It turned out that the more difficult the question was, the more often the child looked away in an attempt to concentrate and find the answer. Interestingly, this situation was observed more often in groups where the dialogue was built face to face.

Liar? Liar!

There is a strong stereotype that during a lie a person is not able to look the interlocutor in the eyes. However, British psychologists from the University of Portsmouth are sure that everything is happening exactly the opposite.

The liar wants to make sure that his "noodles" are securely settled on your ears, so he constantly monitors your emotions, gazing into your eyes. But is this behavior effective?

Power of persuasion

Sometimes liars do the same: knowing that the interlocutor will be unpleasantly surprised by a shifty glance, he looks intently through the person, directing his gaze to the area of his nose.

A series of experiments conducted by psychologists Francis Chen of the University of British Columbia and Julia Minson of the Kennedy School at Harvard University showed that the more closely the speaker looks into the eyes of the interlocutor, the less convincing their speeches seem. Have you ever noticed that many public figures do not look into the eyes, but a little lower or at the bridge of the nose? Close eye contact can often be interpreted as a clear attempt to impose one's point of view.

One on one

British scientists from the University of Portsmouth also proved that people look into the eyes of the interlocutor longer if they are alone with him - an average of 7-10 seconds. This time is reduced to 3-5 seconds if communication takes place in groups.

flirting triangle

A smile, a wink, a long look straight into the eyes ... Such behavior is regarded as modern society like an attempt at flirting. Probably, many of us avoid prolonged eye contact for this very reason. Suddenly a person thinks something is not right?

Communications consultant Susan Rabin, in her book 101 Ways to Flirt, confirms this stereotype: long eye contact is extremely important for flirting, while men and women use different "techniques". If representatives of the strong half of humanity prefer a direct look, which they subconsciously consider a manifestation of strength and courage, then women “glide” their gaze along the so-called “flirting triangle”: the lady first visually examines the entire “object”, if the “test” is passed by the subject successfully, the gaze “rests” on the eyes.

Cause of misfortune

Dr. Peter Hills, who teaches psychology at Anglia Ruskin University, co-authored with Dr. Michael Lewis of Cardiff University, published an article saying that unhappy people try to avoid eye contact.

They are more likely to pay attention to a new hairstyle, beautiful shoes or perfume. Perhaps this is because the suffering person does not want to dive into the true emotional condition interlocutor. He has his own problems "above the roof"!

Visual, auditory or kinesthetic?

Neuro-linguists offer their own explanation. Whether a person likes to look into the eyes or tries to quickly look away - it depends on the way he thinks. Visuals think in terms of visual images, which is why it is so necessary for them to focus on the eyes in order to "read" the missing information.

For auditory people, sounds are important - they are more likely to listen to the timbre and intonations of the voice, looking somewhere to the side. Kinesthetics, relying on intuition and tactile sensations, during communication try to touch the interlocutor, hug, shake hands, while they usually look down.

Aggression, or What does he need?

Social psychologist Julia A. Minson is convinced that eye contact, on the one hand, is a very intimate process, on the other hand, it can reflect the desire of one person to dominate another.

"Animals will never look each other's eyes," says Julia, "unless they are going to then fight for dominance." Indeed, a person staring at you intently gives rise to a feeling of anxiety and a lot of questions.

If this is a stranger in public transport or at a deserted stop, then the question immediately arises: “What does he need?” Nervousness can lead to mutual aggression. If a colleague, a good friend or a nice saleswoman in a supermarket is staring intently into the eyes, you want to quickly look at yourself in the mirror and check if parsley has stuck to your teeth during lunch or if mascara has flowed. Each of us has experienced similar feelings of embarrassment, so often we prefer to quickly look away.

Sep 20, 2016tigress…s

prokrasotu.info

Why does a person not look into the eyes

The ability to confidently look into the eyes of the interlocutor depends on the severity of such character traits as: self-confidence, courage, shyness and firmness.

A few seconds of eye contact can give a person more information than 3 hours of frank conversation. It is precisely because of the strong flow of information that it is psychologically difficult to constantly look into the eyes of the interlocutor.

Quick article navigation

Reasons for not making eye contact

The reason why a person does not look into the eyes of the interlocutor may be due to their own internal complexes or be a kind of reaction to the unpleasant personality of the interlocutor. Scientists identify the following reasons:

Shyness. When a person experiences a feeling of love or interest in an interlocutor, he may be embarrassed that the object of sympathy will guess about his feelings by the eyes;
Guilt;
Lack of self-esteem. Deep emotional excitement is also manifested by the habit of touching something with fingers during communication;
The desire to deceive the interlocutor or hide any information;
Feeling of fear. Subordinates are often afraid to look their boss in the eye;
Lack of interest in the interlocutor. Other signs include constant looking at the clock, yawning, interrupting the conversation, for example, phone calls;
Bad interlocutor. In the company of some people, it becomes uncomfortable because of the heavy piercing gaze. There is a desire to look away and rather stop communicating.

To learn the correct behavior during a conversation, a person needs to train confidence in himself and in what he says. The following psychological techniques will help to achieve this.

Communicating with other people, you can see that with someone this process develops easily, but with someone it is strained. There are people with whom it is not possible to establish a dialogue at all. Moreover, it is not always possible to establish the cause of stress. If you ask yourself what exactly hinders free communication with a certain person, then you may not find a definite answer. Often only such a vague definition as “we are incompatible” or “I don’t like him” comes to mind. But what if we analyze the signs of such difficulties separately? What do they testify? For example, what does it mean that a person does not want to make eye contact when talking?

What you should pay attention to

When you have to deal with such a person, in the process of communication there is a feeling of discomfort. Even a conversation on the most abstract topics is not easy. You look at his face, and he intentionally looks away. When speaking to you, looks away or at another part of the face, such as the chin or lips. If he happens to look straight in the eyes for a moment, he immediately looks away, sometimes even moving away a little after that moment, as if he had been electrocuted. And naturally, the thought runs through your head: “Yes, what is wrong with you?”
Meanwhile, such a feature can have completely different roots. To better understand the nature of this phenomenon, it is necessary to pay attention to some nuances, namely:

Does this person look away when interacting with other people or is it just you?
whether this feature depends on the topic of conversation (personal life, work, gossip, etc.);
what can make him look straight in the eye for a while (surprise, laughter, fear, distrust, anger);
whether this habit depends on the gender of his interlocutor (for example, he communicates normally with representatives of his own sex, but looks away from the opposite sex, or vice versa);
Is this person inherent in isolation in principle or is he quite sociable.

First of all, you should establish whether you are the only person to whom your interlocutor avoids making eye contact. Because if this is so, then the reason lies precisely in you, or rather in his attitude towards you. If in this way he communicates with a group of people or with everyone without exception, then the problem is in himself and only.

It is also important to pay attention to whether the conversation as such is easy for this person. Whether he is talkative, more often cheerful or irritable and withdrawn. Can he talk on the phone for a long time, how much do you know about him and his personal life from himself, whether he willingly participates in mass entertainment, holidays, walks, or prefers solitude. In other words, in the search for a cause, any information is important.

Possible reasons

So, if you have established that your interlocutor does not make eye contact when communicating with you, then the reason may be as follows:

he likes you, and from the realization of this, a person is embarrassed. With all his might, he tries to hide his sympathy, or wants to show it, but has absolutely no idea how to do it. When you turn to him, he is thrown into a fever, his legs become cottony, he answers confusedly and indistinctly, he is angry with himself for this. Eyes avert intuitively, because a direct look in your face will finally unsettle the poor fellow.
You are very annoying to him.. Sometimes such a strong dislike has no objective basis. It’s just that a person categorically does not like it, everything repels him. In this case, you will notice that the reluctance to make eye contact is not the only feature of the dialogue with this person. In principle, he avoids communication with you, ignores your presence whenever possible, never addresses you himself, only responding to your appeal, and even then with obvious reluctance.
He doesn't trust you. Averting his eyes, a person tries to hide his thoughts and feelings, he does not want you to guess about them. True, in this case, he will show a certain degree of distrust to someone else. As a rule, secrecy is not strictly individual in nature, it either exists or it does not.
He gets embarrassed in your presence. This can be observed if, for example, you are a new person in the company, to whom he is not yet accustomed. Or your impulsiveness, openness, assertiveness, eccentricity is so dissonant with his modest and shy nature that when you appear, a person subconsciously shrinks into a ball and, of course, tries to avoid direct eye contact.

If a person does not look into the eyes of almost anyone with whom he has to communicate, then most likely he is extremely insecure, notorious, irritable and withdrawn. Sometimes you can notice how the interlocutor during the conversation not only does not look into the eyes, but, on the contrary, wanders with his eyes, for example, over his lips, as if mentally circles them. This is already a problem of a neurological nature, and has nothing to do with the qualities of a person, especially yours.

When a person avoids looking directly into the eyes of his interlocutor, he has a reason for this. Before you start solving this problem, make sure that you really want it. If he feels extreme dislike for you, then perhaps you should maximize the distance between you in order to avoid situations that are unpleasant for you. In all other cases, the problem is quite manageable.

Sometimes it's enough just to wait. When a person gets used to it, gets to know you better, perhaps this awkwardness will pass by itself. In this case, it is necessary to show patience and tact, to give him the opportunity to open up on his own. It's like the situation with the snail: it peeks out of its shell when it doesn't feel threatened. Pulling it by the horns means achieving the opposite result. Usually a good attitude, sincerity, openness sooner or later melt any ice in communication. If a person is in love with you, give him at least some hint of reciprocity, otherwise he may never decide to take the first step.

Psychologists say that a person who hides his eyes or looks away in a dialogue can be either a very modest person or a liar. And the truth is that the one whose eyes are "running around" gives the impression of a not too decent person. But people often do not like to look eye to eye, and this is not connected with thoughts of stealing or cheating something. Why do we look away? Do liars make eye contact? Modern science has its own answers to these and other questions.

Eyes are the mirror of the soul

Specialists at the University of California are convinced that the quality of communication is 93% determined by non-verbal means. Body language, tonality, timbre of the voice and, of course, the expression of the eyes - all this helps to understand what a person really wants to say.

Trying to focus

Liar? Liar!

The liar wants to make sure that his "noodles" are securely settled on your ears, so he constantly monitors your emotions, gazing into your eyes. But is this behavior effective?

Power of persuasion

Sometimes liars do the same: knowing that the interlocutor will be unpleasantly surprised by a shifty glance, he looks intently through the person, directing his gaze to the area of his nose.

One on one

flirting triangle

A smile, a wink, a long look straight into the eyes ... Such behavior is regarded in modern society as an attempt to flirt. Probably, many of us avoid prolonged eye contact for this very reason. Suddenly a person thinks something is not right?

Cause of misfortune

They are more likely to pay attention to a new hairstyle, beautiful shoes or perfume. Perhaps this is because the suffering person does not want to dive into the true emotional state of the interlocutor. He has his own problems "above the roof"!

Visual, auditory or kinesthetic?

Aggression, or What does he need?

Social psychologist Julia A. Minson is convinced that eye contact, on the one hand, is a very intimate process, on the other hand, it can reflect the desire of one person to dominate another.

Sep 20, 2016 tigress…s

Why doesn't the person make eye contact?

There can be many reasons. For example, an obsessive interlocutor. Many believe that a person averted his eyes, so he is hiding something. I agree, but this is not always the case. There are cultures where eye contact is simply not accepted.

Often I notice behind myself that I look away, but the reason lies in me. This is not a desire to hide something from the interlocutor, but simply a way to get out of his influence.

I remember that at some trainings they learned to conduct a conversation, consciously maintaining eye contact. Interesting experience and I often use it to show my sincerity and openness in conversation. And yet, the eyes can determine the instantaneous thoughts of a person. This is also very interesting and even useful.

Many believe that if a person does not look directly into the eyes, then he is hiding something from the interlocutor, he is simply lying to him or he is not comfortable, for example, his eyes start to hurt or he is distracted by something.

I agree with the above statements. And you know, it is also difficult for a person to look into the eyes when he is in love. for some reason it becomes uncomfortable, timid, etc.

It primarily depends on the sociotype of the person.

For example, black ethics always look into the eyes and it doesn’t matter if they lie, are shy or scared ... They care about people’s reaction to them

But painful white ethics, as a rule, do not look into the eyes at all. And this is rather because their self-esteem is highly dependent on what they see in these eyes.

Some people don't look into their eyes so they don't see the world behind those eyes...

Perhaps the person is nearsighted. Nearsighted people have a habit of not looking into the face and into the eyes. Perhaps a person is shy or insecure, for such people this is also typical. Another reason is that a person is thinking hard about something else during a conversation. And the most common reason is that a person has something to hide from the interlocutor, and he is afraid that his glance can betray him.

A person does not look into the eyes for several reasons:

This is a banal fear (a person feels that you are morally stronger than him, and tries to look away)
Perhaps the person just feels guilty towards you. Something and somewhere naughty, and now he is ashamed to look you in the eye.
The most common case is the deceitfulness of someone who looks into your eyes.

From time immemorial, people who never make eye contact have been treated with caution and distrust. Probably not in vain.

Fear
Timidity
embarrassment
Habit
Not interesting

There are many different reasons for not looking people in the eye.

Of these, many have already been listed: these are the cases when a person lies, when he is uncomfortable in something in front of the interlocutor, there is a feeling of guilt or shame, when a person is simply embarrassed to look into his eyes and this happens due to shyness or embarrassment, when a person’s attention defocused and he simply cannot keep him at one point for a long time, when the conversation is not interesting to him, he seems to be just present, and his thoughts are occupied with something else.

Also, a person may avoid eye contact if the interlocutor has a strong look, from which the person feels uncomfortable.

I try not to make eye contact, because I know how much I can embarrass the interlocutor, for the same reason I wear dark glasses wherever possible, even in winter.

True, the ability to regulate volume his gaze, so as not to bring discomfort to communication and not to embarrass anyone.

It's not that simple, my dears. I do not like to look into the eyes, because sometimes information about a person starts to go and pulls him to help, but without his desire I have no right to do this. Therefore, more often I look at the bridge of my nose or walk with my eyes. In general, the eyes are a whole portal to the human world and through them you can greatly influence health, psyche and just mood.

For a long time I could not accustom myself to look the interlocutor in the eye, the point is this: holding my gaze, I gradually lost the thread of the story and stopped catching what was being said to me. One thought was spinning: look into the eyes! Over time, it becomes a habit and the interlocutor evaluates, reacts to you differently. This manner inspires confidence, convinces you that it is really important and interesting for you.

There may be several reasons:
1. It's a habit... I know people who just don't look into your eyes, but speak as if to you, but at the same time they look at that branch on the tree.
2. It's a shame ... a person has done something in relation to the interlocutor that puts him in an awkward position.
3. The interlocutor is distracted ... Staring at a pretty girl / guy ...

There are different types of eyes. Some radiate light, others want to run away. Looking into the eyes, you can see a person is sad or happy, angry or calm, even diseases can be unraveled. This is the most mysterious organ. Mystics attribute magical powers to them, physicists say that impulses come from them that can act on other people. Why doesn't the person make eye contact? Let's take a look at this in the article.

Not without reason, some people can directly and openly to the interlocutor, others look away. For some reason, it is believed that a person who looks straight ahead is honest, and one who looks away is a liar. Is everything really so and what do psychologists and scientists think about it? Is eye to eye good or is it negative? Psychologists believe that there is some truth in this, especially if there are concomitant factors: eyes run, a person touches his face and blinks very often. All this allows you to suspect the interlocutor of a lie and not really trust him.

But there are skillful liars, you can’t figure them out by these signs, they have learned to control themselves and can look straight into the eyes, as if checking whether the interlocutor believes them or not. Should all those who hide their eyes be considered liars? It turns out it's not worth it. There are many other reasons why people look away.

Among those who do not look directly at the interlocutor

Shy and insecure people. They try not to look the interlocutor in the eye, afraid to betray their feelings.
A person who does not want his opponent to find out any information about him. It is believed that one second of gazing into the eyes reveals more information than three hours of communication.
Heavy look. Since ancient times, people were afraid of the evil eye, as if cold, sliding into the inside of the gaze. Not everyone is able to withstand this. This look makes me want to hide.
The interlocutor is uninteresting, except for a glance, he gives out yawns, interrupting the conversation over trifles, constantly looking at the time.
Too much stare causes irritation. Few enjoy that kind of attention.
When a person is upset about something or hides information, he does not look into the eyes of the interlocutor.
If the question turned out to be very difficult, in order to concentrate, the interlocutor looks away.

These are just the most popular reasons, in fact, there are many more. It turns out that according to the type of perception, all people are divided into four groups and each has its own characteristics.

Types of people's perception

visual

He needs to consider everything, so he looks directly into the eyes, trying to read all the information. Thirty percent of the population is of this type.

Audial

He doesn't make eye contact, he doesn't need to. For this type of people, the voice, its color, melody, timbre is important. They look away. There are not so many of them, only ten percent.

kinesthetic

This is a person who strives to touch his arm, shoulder, touch is important to him, he pays attention to movement, smell. And these people are the most, there are forty percent of them.

Digital

This is a person to whom the content is important, what is the object of attention. He draws attention to some useful qualities for him. He looks for meaning in everything. And only after that, will consider the interlocutor. Only 20% digital. Whatever type of person an individual is, it must be remembered that not looking away for a long time can be considered bad manners. English scientists believe that the direct gaze of the interlocutor lasts an average of 7 seconds. It should be noted that what nationality a person also plays an important role, due to their mentality, not everyone can look into the eyes.

How people of different nationalities look

Representatives of European and Latin American nations look into each other's eyes and this is considered the norm. An American male who looks into the eyes of a man for a long time may be suspected that he is related to people. gay. Among Armenians, Georgians, Turks and Arabs, a woman should not look into the eyes of a man, her gaze is directed downwards, as a sign of respect for a man. The gaze of the Chinese is directed to the bottom of the face, to look directly into the eyes, this is a bad form. The Japanese never consider interlocutors. This is not allowed by their etiquette. For Russians, it is also considered the norm, only for a little, they linger on the look during a conversation.

For all nationalities, eye contact can be regarded as an attempt to impose their point of view. It may indicate a desire for the superiority of one person over another. There is also an intimate look. The eyes of lovers shine with a special light. And they can look at each other for a long time.

Men and women

Will carefully look at the fair sex, if he is in love with her. But if this stranger, then most likely he experiences aggression and is hostile. To understand what exactly a representative of the opposite sex is experiencing, it is worth looking at the pupil, if he likes a lady, then they expand, if he is angry, then they narrow. But it is worth remembering that the pupils can have the same reaction to light.

Another trick that will help you find out if a man is interested or not. Psychologists believe that if a look lasts less than 4 seconds, then, alas, if more than 8 seconds, you can count on sympathy. often play with the eyes. And lowered eyelashes can mean coquetry. When a woman's gaze is directed upwards, and not at the object of attention, it is believed that she has no romantic intentions. She is looking for profit. Contrary to the belief that eye to eye contact is a good sign There are times when you don't need to do this.

It is considered unacceptable to stare into the eyes of another child. Children's eyes are the most open, hence all sorts of fears. By folk beliefs, staring can lead to the evil eye. It is advisable to avoid the gaze of gypsies, for your own safety, so as not to fall under the hypnotic influence. According to some unspoken rule, it is better not to make eye contact with a person of higher rank.

There are a lot of reasons to look away, it’s impossible to list them all, for example, even the distance affects how long the interlocutor can withstand the look. How closer man, the shorter the eye contact and vice versa, the further, the easier it is to make eye contact. Whether a person looks directly into the eyes or looks away, it does not matter. The main thing is what feeling from this is experienced by the one at whom the gaze is directed. If communication brings joy, then probably you should not look for dirty tricks, but just enjoy the dialogue.

We recommend reading

Goddess Hera: Mythology of Greece and Rome

Khasanzyanova Aisylu Gera Summary of the myth Gera Ludovisi. Sculpture, 5...

When is the time of reincarnation and what happens to the soul at this moment?

Indians have a calm attitude towards death. The reason is simple. They believe in...

What is reincarnation: myth, reality or hoax?

It is known that at the moment of death the soul leaves the physical body. But left...

If a person never makes eye contact. Possible reasons why a person does not look into the eyes - complexes

When a teenager does not make eye contact

When an adult does not make eye contact

What to do if a person does not make eye contact?

Other reasons why a person avoids making eye contact

Reasons why a person looks away

Why they don't look into your eyes

More articles on this topic:

8 exercises that will teach you to look the interlocutor in the eye when talking

Why don't people make eye contact?

Just keep your eyes peeled...

Learning to look into the eyes

Visual acuity exercises

Watch without blinking

Insightful eye exercises

Read also:

Why does a man avoid making eye contact?

Eyes are the mirror of the soul

Trying to focus

Liar? Liar!

Power of persuasion

One on one

flirting triangle

Cause of misfortune

Visual, auditory or kinesthetic?

Aggression, or What does he need?

Why does a person not look into the eyes

Reasons for not making eye contact

What you should pay attention to

Possible reasons

Eyes are the mirror of the soul

Trying to focus

Liar? Liar!

Power of persuasion

One on one

flirting triangle

Cause of misfortune

Visual, auditory or kinesthetic?

Aggression, or What does he need?

Among those who do not look directly at the interlocutor

Types of people's perception

visual

Audial

kinesthetic

Digital

How people of different nationalities look

Men and women

We recommend reading

Site search