Confession: how it goes, how to prepare, what to say to the priest. Church sacraments: how to correctly write sins for confession and prepare for it

In today's world, the gospel call to always be awake and pray without ceasing is very difficult to put into practice. Constant worries, a very high pace of life, especially in large cities, practically deprive Christians of the opportunity to retire and stand before God in prayer. But the concept of prayer is still extremely relevant, and it is certainly necessary to turn to it. Regular prayer always leads to the thought of repentance, which occurs at confession. Prayer is an example of how you can accurately and objectively assess your state of mind.

Concept of sin

Sin should not be seen as some kind of legal violation of a God-given law. This is not a “going beyond” accepted in the mind, but a violation of the laws that are natural for human nature. Each person is endowed by God with absolute freedom; accordingly, any falls are made consciously. In fact, by committing sin, a person neglects the commandments and values ​​given from above. There is a free choice in favor of negative deeds, thoughts and other actions. Such a spiritual crime harms the personality itself, damaging the very vulnerable inner strings of human nature. Sin is based on passions, inherited or acquired, as well as original susceptibility, which made a person mortal and weaker to various diseases and vices.

This greatly contributes to the fact that the soul deviates towards evil and immorality. Sin is different, its severity, of course, depends on many factors in which it is committed. There is a conditional division of sins: against God, against neighbor and against oneself. Considering your own deeds through such a gradation, you can understand how to write a confession. An example will be discussed below.

Consciousness of sin and confession

It is extremely important to understand that in order to eliminate dark spiritual spots, you should constantly turn your inner gaze on yourself, analyze your actions, thoughts and words, and objectively evaluate the moral scale of your own values. Having found disturbing and haunting features, you need to carefully deal with them, because if you turn a blind eye to sin, you will very soon get used to it, which will distort the soul and lead to spiritual illness. The main way out of this situation is repentance and repentance.

It is repentance that grows from the depths of the heart and mind that can change a person for the better, bring the light of kindness and mercy. But the path of repentance is a lifelong path. He is prone to sin and will commit it every day. Even the great ascetics who secluded themselves in deserted places sinned with thoughts and could repent daily. Therefore, close attention to one's soul should not weaken, and with age, the criteria for personal assessment should be subjected to more stringent requirements. The next step after repentance is confession.

An example of correct confession is true repentance

In Orthodoxy, confession is recommended for all people over the age of seven. A child brought up in a Christian family, by the age of seven or eight, already acquires an understanding of the sacrament. Often it is prepared in advance, explaining in detail all aspects of this difficult issue. Some parents show an example of a confession written on paper, which was invented in advance. A child left alone with such information has the opportunity to reflect and see something in himself. But in the case of children, priests and parents rely primarily on the psychological state of the child and his worldview, the ability to analyze and realize the criteria of good and evil. With excessive haste in forcibly attracting children, one can sometimes observe deplorable results and examples.

Confessions in the church often turn into a formal "roll call" of sins, while the performance of only the "outer" part of the sacrament is unacceptable. You can not try to justify yourself, to hide something embarrassing and shameful. You need to listen to yourself and understand whether repentance is really present, or whether there is just an ordinary ritual ahead that will not bring any benefit to the soul, but can cause significant harm.

Confession is a voluntary and repentant enumeration of sins. This sacrament includes two main parts:

1) Confession before the priest of sins by a person who has come to the sacrament.

2) Prayerful forgiveness and resolution of sins, which the shepherd pronounces.

Preparation for confession

A question that torments not only novice Christians, but sometimes even those who have been churched for a long time - what to say in confession? An example of how to repent can be found in various sources. It can be a prayer book or a separate book dedicated to this particular sacrament.

When preparing for confession, one can rely on the commandments, ordeals, take the example of the confession of holy ascetics who left notes and sayings on this topic.

If we build a penitential monologue on the basis of the division of sins into three types given above, then we can determine an incomplete, approximate list of deviations.

Sins against God

This category includes lack of faith, superstition, lack of hope in God's mercy, formality and lack of faith in the tenets of Christianity, grumbling and ungratefulness of God, and oaths. This group includes an irreverent attitude towards objects of veneration - icons, the Gospel, the Cross, and so on. Mention should be made of skipping services for an unexcused reason and leaving obligatory rules, prayers, and also if the prayers were read hastily, without attention and the necessary concentration.

Adhering to various sectarian teachings, thoughts of suicide, turning to sorcerers and soothsayers, wearing mystical talismans is considered apostasy, and this must be brought to confession. An example of this category of sins is, of course, approximate, and each person can supplement or shorten this list.

Sins against neighbor

This group considers the attitude towards people: relatives, friends, colleagues and just casual acquaintances and strangers. The first thing that is most often clearly revealed in the heart is the lack of love. Often, instead of love, there is a consumer attitude. Inability and unwillingness to forgive, hatred, malevolence, malevolence and revenge, stinginess, condemnation, gossip, lies, indifference to someone else's misfortune, mercilessness and cruelty - all these ugly thorns in the human soul must be confessed. Separately, actions are indicated in which there was open self-harm or material harm was caused. It can be fights, extortion, robbery.
The gravest sin is abortion, which will certainly entail church punishment after it is taken to confession. An example of what punishment can be is learned from the parish priest. As a rule, penance is imposed, but it will be more disciplinary than redemptive.

Sins directed against oneself

This group is reserved for personal sins. Despondency, terrible despair and thoughts of one's own hopelessness or exorbitant pride, contempt, vanity - such passions can poison a person's life and even drive him to suicide.

Thus, listing all the commandments one by one, the pastor calls for a detailed examination of the state of mind and checking whether it corresponds to the essence of the message.

About brevity

Priests often ask to confess briefly. This does not mean that it is not necessary to name some kind of sin. We must try to talk specifically about sin, but not about the circumstances in which it was committed, without involving third parties who may be somehow involved in the situation, and without describing in detail the details. If repentance occurs in the temple for the first time, you can sketch an example of confession on paper, then during the exposure of oneself in sins it will be easier to get together, convey to the priest and, most importantly, to God absolutely everything noticed, without forgetting anything.

It is recommended to pronounce the name of the sin itself: lack of faith, anger, insult or condemnation. This will be enough to convey what worries and weighs heavily on the heart. “Extracting” exact sins from oneself is not an easy task, but this is how a short confession is created. An example may be the following: “Sinned (a): pride, despondency, foul language, fear of little faith, excessive idleness, bitterness, lies, ambition, abandonment of services and rules, irritability, temptation, bad and unclean thoughts, excess in food, laziness. I also repent of those sins about which I forgot (a) and did not utter (la) now.

Confession, of course, is a difficult task that requires effort and self-denial. But when a person gets used to the purity of heart and tidiness of the soul, he will no longer be able to live without repentance and the sacrament of communion. A Christian will not want to lose the newly acquired connection with the Almighty and will only strive to strengthen it. It is very important to approach spiritual life not in jerks, but sedately, carefully, regularly, to be “faithful in little things”, not forgetting gratitude to God in absolutely all life situations.

Confession is one of the main sacraments of the Church. But it's not easy to get through. Shame and fear of condemnation or a priest prevent you from approaching him correctly. In our article, we will tell you how to correctly write sins for confession and prepare for it. We hope that our tips will help you on your path to cleansing.

How to Prepare for Confession

Church confession is a conscious step. It is not customary to do it without preparation and preliminary analysis of sins. Therefore, before the sacrament it is necessary:

If you plan to take communion along with confession, then the day before you need to read the following prayers: Canon of repentance to our Lord Jesus Christ, Canon of prayer to the Most Holy Theotokos, Canon to the Guardian Angel and Follow-up to Holy Communion.

Before confession, you should come to the church service on time. In some churches, the priest begins to confess before the start of the main service. They start the sacrament on an empty stomach, you should not even drink coffee or tea.

For convenience, divide sins into several blocks: against God and the church, against relatives and against yourself.

Sins against God and the Church:

• belief in omens, divination and dreams;
• hypocrisy in worshiping God;
• doubt about the existence of God, complaints;
• deliberate committing of sinful acts in the hope of indulgence;
• laziness in prayer and church attendance;
• the mention of God in everyday life, so to speak, for a bunch of words;
• non-observance of posts;
• failure to fulfill promises made to God;
• suicide attempts;
• mention of evil spirits in the speech.

Sins against relatives:

Sins against yourself:

• careless attitude to God's gift (talent);
• excessive consumption of food and alcohol, as well as tobacco products and drugs;
• laziness in doing household chores (doing without effort, for show);
• careless attitude to things;
• inattention to one's health or, conversely, excessive search for diseases;
• fornication (indiscriminate sexual intercourse, betrayal of a spouse, satisfaction of carnal desires, reading love books, viewing erotic photos and films, erotic fantasies and memories);
• love of money (thirst for wealth, bribe, theft);
• envy of other people's success (career, shopping opportunities and travel).

We have listed the most common sins. How to write sins for confession correctly and whether it is worth doing it is up to you. When confessing, do not list them all. Speak only of those in whom you have sinned.

Condemnation of others, giving examples from life or justifying oneself are unacceptable. It is only through sincere repentance that one receives purification. Twice in one case they do not confess. Only if you repeat the offense again.

When compiling the list, briefly describe the situation so that the priest and you yourself understand what it is about. Tell not just that you do not respect your parents, but how it manifested itself, for example, you raised your voice to your mother in an argument.

Also, do not use church phrases if you do not understand them. Confession is a conversation with God, speak in a language that is understandable to you. For example, if you really like sweets, say so. Don't use "gluttony".

The division of sins into separate blocks will allow you to streamline your thoughts. By moving from one group to another, you will become aware of the reasons for the act and will be able to avoid its repetition. Follow his points and the question “How to write sins for confession?” won't bother you anymore. And you will concentrate on the main thing.

The sacrament of confession is a test for the soul. It consists of the desire to repent, verbal confession, repentance for sins. When a person goes against the laws of God, he gradually destroys his spiritual and physical shell. Repentance helps to cleanse. It reconciles man with God. The soul is healed and gains strength to fight sin.

Confession allows you to talk about your misdeeds and receive forgiveness. In excitement and fear, one can forget what one wanted to repent of. The list of sins for confession serves as a reminder, a hint. It can be read in full or used as an outline. The main thing is that the confession should be sincere and truthful.

Sacrament

Confession is the main component of repentance. This is an opportunity to ask for forgiveness for your sins, to be cleansed of them. Confession gives spiritual strength to resist evil. Sin is a discrepancy in thoughts, words, deeds with God's permission.

Confession is a sincere awareness of wicked deeds, a desire to get rid of them. No matter how difficult and unpleasant it is to remember them, you should tell the clergyman about your sins in detail.

For this sacrament, a complete interconnection of feelings and words is necessary, because the everyday enumeration of one's sins will not bring true purification. Feelings without words are just as ineffective as words without feelings.

There is a list of sins to confess. This is a large list of all indecent actions or words. It is based on the 7 deadly sins and 10 commandments. Human life is too diverse to be absolutely righteous. Therefore, confession is an opportunity to repent of sins and try to prevent them in the future.

How to prepare for confession?

Preparations for confession should take place in a few days. The list of sins can be written on a piece of paper. Special literature on the sacraments of confession and communion should be read.

One should not look for excuses for sins, one should be aware of their wickedness. It is best to analyze each day, sorting out what was good and what was bad. Such a daily habit will help to be more attentive to thoughts and actions.

Before confession, you should make peace with everyone who was offended. Forgive those who offended. Prior to confession, it is necessary to strengthen the prayer rule. Add to the evening reading the Penitential Canon, the canons of the Mother of God.

One should separate personal repentance (when a person mentally repents of his actions) and the sacrament of confession (when a person talks about his sins in the desire to be cleansed of them).

The presence of a third party requires a moral effort to realize the depth of the offense, it will force, through overcoming shame, to take a deeper look at wrong actions. Therefore, a list of sins is so necessary for confession in Orthodoxy. It will help to reveal what was forgotten or wanted to be hidden.

If you have any difficulties in compiling a list of sinful actions, you can purchase the book "Full Confession". It is in every church shop. There is a detailed list of sins for confession, features of the sacrament. Samples of confession and materials for preparing for it have been published.

Rules

Is there a heaviness in your soul, do you want to speak out, ask for forgiveness? After confession, it becomes much easier. This is an open, sincere confession and repentance for committed misconduct. You can go to confession up to 3 times a week. The desire to be cleansed of sins will help overcome the feeling of constraint and awkwardness.

The rarer the confession, the more difficult it is to remember all the events, thoughts. The best option for the sacrament is once a month. Help in confession - a list of sins - will prompt the necessary words. The main thing is for the priest to understand the essence of the offense. Then the punishment for sin will be justified.

After confession, the priest imposes penance in difficult cases. This is punishment, excommunication from the holy sacraments and God's grace. Its duration is determined by the priest. In most cases, the penitent will face moral and corrective work. For example, fasting, reading prayers, canons, akathists.

Sometimes the list of sins for confession is read out by the priest. You can write your own list of what has been done. It is better to come to confession after the evening service or in the morning, before the liturgy.

How is the sacrament

In some situations, you should invite the priest for confession to the house. This is done if the person is seriously ill or near death.

Upon entering the temple, it is necessary to take a queue for confession. During the entire time of the sacrament, the cross and the Gospel lie on the lectern. This symbolizes the invisible presence of the Savior.

Prior to confession, the priest may begin to ask questions. For example, about how often prayers are said, whether church rules are observed.

Then the mystery begins. It is best to prepare your list of sins for confession. A sample of it can always be purchased at the church. If the sins forgiven at the previous confession were repeated, then they should be mentioned again - this is considered a more serious offense. You should not hide anything from the priest or speak in hints. You should clearly explain in simple words those sins that you repent of.

If the priest tore up the list of sins for confession, then the sacrament is over and absolution has been given. The priest puts an epitrachelion on the penitent's head. This means the return of God's grace. After that, they kiss the cross, the Gospel, which symbolizes the readiness to live according to the commandments.

Getting Ready for Confession: A List of Sins

Confession is intended to comprehend one's sin, the desire to correct oneself. It is difficult for a person who is far from the church to understand what actions should be considered ungodly. That's why there are 10 commandments. They clearly spell out what not to do. It is better to prepare a list of sins for confession according to the commandments in advance. On the day of the sacrament, you can get excited and forget everything. Therefore, you should calmly re-read the commandments a few days before confession and write down your sins.

If confession is the first, then it is not easy to sort out the seven deadly sins and the ten commandments on your own. Therefore, you should approach the priest in advance, in a personal conversation, tell about your difficulties.

A list of sins for confession with an explanation of sins can be purchased at the church or found on the website of your temple. The decoding details all alleged sins. From this general list, one should single out what was done personally. Then write down your list of wrongdoings.

Sins committed against God

• Unbelief in God, doubts, ingratitude.
• The absence of a pectoral cross, unwillingness to defend the faith in front of detractors.
• Oaths in the name of God, pronouncing the name of the Lord in vain (not during prayer or conversations about God).
• Visiting sects, divination, treatment with all kinds of magic, reading and spreading false teachings.
• Gambling, suicidal thoughts, foul language.
• Not attending the temple, the absence of a daily prayer rule.
• Non-observance of fasts, unwillingness to read Orthodox literature.
• Condemnation of the clergy, thoughts about worldly things during worship.
• Waste of time for entertainment, watching TV, inactivity at the computer.
• Despair in difficult situations, excessive hope in oneself or someone else's help without faith in God's providence.
• Concealment of sins at confession.

Sins committed against neighbors

• Hot temper, anger, arrogance, pride, vanity.
• Lies, non-intervention, ridicule, stinginess, extravagance.
• Raising children outside of faith.
• Failure to return debts, non-payment for labor, refusal to help those who ask and those in need.
• Unwillingness to help parents, disrespect for them.
• Theft, condemnation, envy.
• Quarrels, drinking alcohol at the wake.
• Murder with a word (slander, bringing to suicide or illness).
• Killing a child in the womb, persuading others to have an abortion.

Sins committed against yourself

• Foul language, pride, idle talk, gossip.
• The desire for profit, enrichment.
• Showing off good deeds.
• Envy, lies, drunkenness, gluttony, drug use.
• Fornication, adultery, incest, masturbation.

List of sins for a woman's confession

This is a very delicate list, and many women refuse confession after reading it. Do not trust any information you read. Even if a pamphlet with a list of sins for a woman was purchased in a church shop, be sure to pay attention to the neck. There should be an inscription "recommended by the publishing council of the Russian Orthodox Church."

Priests do not disclose the secret of confession. Therefore, it is best to go through the sacrament with a permanent confessor. The Church does not intrude into the sphere of intimate marital relations. Questions of contraception, which is sometimes equated with abortion, are best discussed with a priest. There are drugs that do not have an abortion effect, but only prevent the birth of life. In any case, all controversial issues should be discussed with the spouse, doctor, confessor.

Here is a list of sins to confess (short):

1. Rarely prayed, did not attend church.
2. I thought more about worldly things during prayer.
3. Allowed sexual intercourse before marriage.
4. Abortions, declining others to them.
5. She had impure thoughts and desires.
6. Watched movies, read pornographic books.
7. Gossip, lies, envy, laziness, resentment.
8. Excessive exposure of the body to attract attention.
9. Fear of old age, wrinkles, thoughts of suicide.
10. Addiction to sweets, alcohol, drugs.
11. Avoidance of helping other people.
12. Seeking help from fortune-tellers, soothsayers.
13. Superstition.

List of sins for a man

There is debate about whether to prepare a list of sins for confession. Someone believes that such a list harms the sacrament and contributes to the formal reading of offenses. The main thing in confession is to realize your sins, repent and prevent their repetition. Therefore, the list of sins may be a brief reminder or not at all.

A formal confession is not considered valid, since there is no repentance in it. Returning after the sacrament to the former life will add hypocrisy. The balance of spiritual life consists in understanding the essence of repentance, where confession is only the beginning of the realization of one's sinfulness. This is a long process, consisting of several stages of internal work. The creation of spiritual resources is a systematic adjustment of conscience, responsibility for one's relationship with God.

Here is a list of sins for confession (short) for a man:

1. Sacrilege, conversations in the temple.
2. Doubt in faith, afterlife.
3. Blasphemy, mockery of the poor.
4. Cruelty, laziness, pride, vanity, greed.
5. Evasion from military service.
6. Avoidance of unwanted work, shirking duties.
7. Insults, hatred, fights.
8. Slander, disclosure of other people's weaknesses.
9. Seduction to sin (fornication, drunkenness, drugs, gambling).
10. Refusal to help parents, other people.
11. Theft, aimless collecting.
12. Tendency to boast, argue, humiliate one's neighbor.
13. Insolence, rudeness, contempt, familiarity, cowardice.

Confession for a child

For a child, the sacrament of confession can begin at the age of seven. Until this age, children are allowed to take Communion without this. Parents should prepare the child for confession: explain the essence of the sacrament, tell why it is performed, remember with him possible sins.

The child must be made to understand that sincere repentance is the preparation for confession. It is better for a child to write a list of sins himself. He must realize what actions were wrong, try not to repeat them in the future.

Older children themselves decide whether to confess or not. Do not limit the free will of a child, a teenager. The personal example of parents is much more important than all conversations.

The kid must remember his sins before confession. A list of them can be compiled after the child answers the questions:

• How often does he read a prayer (in the morning, in the evening, before meals), which ones does he know by heart?
• Does he go to church, how does he behave in the service?
• Does he wear a pectoral cross, is he distracted or not during prayers and services?
• Have you ever deceived your parents or father during confession?
• Wasn't he proud of his successes, victories, wasn't he conceited?
• Does he fight or not with other children, does he offend babies or animals?
• Does he tell other children to shield himself?
• Did you commit theft, did you envy someone?
• Did you laugh at other people's physical imperfections?
• Did you play cards (smoked, drank alcohol, tried drugs, used foul language)?
• Is she lazy or helps her parents around the house?
• Did he pretend to be sick to avoid his duties?

1. A person himself determines whether to confess or not, how many times to attend the sacrament.
2. Prepare a list of sins for confession. It is better to take a sample in the temple where the sacrament will take place, or find it yourself in church literature.
3. It is optimal to go to confession to the same clergyman who will become a mentor and will contribute to spiritual growth.
4. Confession is free.

First you need to ask what days confessions take place in the temple. You should dress appropriately. For men, a shirt or T-shirt with sleeves, trousers or jeans (not shorts). For women - a scarf on the head, no cosmetics (at least lipstick), a skirt no higher than the knees.

Sincerity of confession

A priest, as a psychologist, can recognize how sincere a person is in his repentance. There is a confession that offends the sacrament and the Lord. If a person mechanically talks about sins, has several confessors, conceals the truth - such actions do not lead to repentance.

Behavior, tone of speech, words used in confession - all this matters. Only in this way does the priest understand how sincere the penitent is. Pangs of conscience, embarrassment, worries, shame contribute to spiritual purification.

Sometimes the personality of a priest is important for a parishioner. This is not a reason to condemn and comment on the actions of the clergy. You can go to another temple or turn to another holy father for confession.

Sometimes it's hard to voice your sins. The emotional experiences are so strong that it is more convenient to make a list of unrighteous actions. Batiushka is attentive to every parishioner. If, because of shame, it is impossible to tell about everything and repentance is deep, then the sins, the list of which is compiled before confession, the clergyman has the right to release without even reading them.

The meaning of confession

Having to talk about your sins in front of a stranger is embarrassing. Therefore, people refuse to go to confession, believing that God will forgive them anyway. This is the wrong approach. The priest acts only as an intermediary between man and God. His task is to determine the measure of repentance. The priest has no right to condemn anyone, he will not expel a penitent from the church. At confession, people are very vulnerable, and the clergy try not to cause unnecessary suffering.

It is important to see your sin, to recognize and condemn it in your soul, to voice it before the priest. Have a desire not to repeat your misdeeds anymore, try to atone for the harm done by works of mercy. Confession brings the rebirth of the soul, re-education and access to a new spiritual level.

Sins (list), Orthodoxy, confession imply self-knowledge and the search for grace. All good deeds are done through force. Only by overcoming oneself, engaging in works of mercy, cultivating virtues in oneself, one can receive God's grace.

The significance of confession lies in understanding the typology of sinners, the typology of sin. At the same time, an individual approach to each penitent is akin to pastoral psychoanalysis. The sacrament of confession is the pain from the realization of sin, its recognition, the determination to voice and ask for forgiveness for it, the purification of the soul, joy and peace.

The person must feel the need for repentance. Love for God, love for oneself, love for one's neighbor cannot exist separately. The symbolism of the Christian cross - horizontal (love for God) and vertical (love for oneself and one's neighbor) - consists in the awareness of the integrity of spiritual life, its essence.

Hieromonk Evstafiy (Khalimankov)

This question arises for many people who want to change their lives with the help of the Church and the sacrament of Penance. However, independent search does not always lead to the correct answer. Let's try to give an answer based on the real experience of the clergy of the Zhirovitsky monastery.

Coming to confession, one should always ask oneself a clear and precise question: why am I doing this? Am I going to change my life, which actually means the very word "repentance" (from the Greek. Throwing - a change in mind, worldview, a smart approach to everything)?

In the sacrament of repentance, one can distinguish three main points or a kind of penitential stage. Only by successively passing through all these stages, a person can hope for victory over sin in himself. Consider the parable of the prodigal son. After the youngest son received his share from his father and squandered it, “living prodigally”, the “moment of truth” comes. It becomes clear that no one needs him. And then the youngest son remembers his father: “When he came to his senses, he said: how many hirelings my father has in abundance in bread, and I am dying of hunger!” ().

So, first stage repentance is to “come to your senses”, to think about your life: to realize that I still live wrong and ... remember that there is always a way out in any situation. And the only way out is the Lord. We all begin to remember God only in sorrows, illnesses, etc. Including church people: those who more or less regularly attend the temple confess and take communion; even they remember about God - that all problems are solved in Him - not immediately.

Second phase- determination to part with sin and direct confession of sin. The prodigal son takes this only right decision: “I will get up, go to my father and say to him: Father! I have sinned against heaven and before you, and I am no longer worthy to be called your son; accept me as one of your hired hands. He got up and went to his father. And while he was still far away, his father saw him and had compassion; and, running, fell on his neck and kissed him. The son said to him: Father! I have sinned against heaven and before you, and I am no longer worthy to be called your son. And the father said to his servants: Bring the best clothes and dress him, and put a ring on his hand and shoes on his feet; and bring a fattened calf, and kill it; Let's eat and be merry! for this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found. And they began to have fun ”(). The person has already understood that it is impossible to live the way he lives now, so he takes concrete steps to change the situation.

The Lord, like the father from the gospel parable, is waiting for each of us. The Lord, so to speak, longs for our repentance. None of us is as concerned about our own salvation as God is. Each of us, I believe, experienced that joy, relief, deep peace of the soul after a truly serious confession? The Lord expects from us this depth, seriousness in relation to Himself. We take a step towards God, and He takes a few steps towards us. If only we would make up our minds and take this saving step forward… And this is exactly what is manifested, first of all, in confession.

What do we say in confession to God? This, in fact, is the main topic of this article. Let's start with the fact that sometimes a person does not even understand what to repent of: "I didn't kill anyone, I didn't steal", etc. And if in the Old Testament system of coordinates, at the level of the ten Moses commandments (to which the so-called “universal values” are close), we somehow orient ourselves, then the Gospel remains for us some kind of distant, transcendent reality, in no way connected with life. But it is precisely the commandments of the Gospel that are for Christians the law that should regulate their whole life. Therefore, to begin with, we must take the trouble to at least learn about these commandments. It is best to read the Gospel with the interpretation of the holy fathers. You ask: what, we ourselves will not be able to understand the New Testament on our own? Well, start reading and I think you will have a lot of questions. To find answers to them, you can read the book of the archbishop "The Four Gospels". You can also recommend the wonderful book "The Interpretation of the Gospel", which very successfully synthesized the patristic experience. A similar work belongs to: “The Four Gospels. A Guide to the Study of the Holy Scriptures. All these texts can now be found without any problems in church shops, stores, or, in any case, on the Internet.

When the prospect of a gospel life opens up to a person, he will finally realize how far his own life is from the most elementary foundations of the gospel. Then, by itself, it will become clear what you need to repent of and how to continue to live.

Now it is necessary to say a few words about how to confess. It turns out that this also needs to be learned and, sometimes, throughout life. How often do you hear in confession a dry, formal enumeration of sins read out in some church (or near-church) pamphlet. Once, in confession, a young man read from a piece of paper, among other sins, “love of carriages.” I asked him - does he know what it is? He honestly said, “Approximately,” and smiled. When you listen to these treatises at confession, then over time you begin to identify the primary sources: “Yeah, this is from the book “To Help the Penitent”, and this is from “The Cure for Sin ...”.

Of course, there are really good manuals that can be recommended to beginning confessors. For example, “The Experience of Building a Confession” by the archimandrite or the book “To Help the Penitents”, already mentioned by us, compiled according to creations. Of course, they can be used, but only with a certain reservation. You can't "get stuck" on them. A Christian must also progress in confession. For example, a person can go to confession for years and, like a well-learned lesson, repeat the same thing: “I sinned in deed, word, thought, condemnation, idle talk, negligence, absent-mindedness in prayer ...” - then follows a certain set of so-called common sins so-called church people. What is the problem here? Yes, in the fact that a person loses the habit of spiritual work on his soul and gradually gets used to this sinful "gentleman's set" so much that he almost feels nothing at confession. Very often a person hides real pain and shame from sin behind these general words. After all, it is one thing to mutter, among other things, “condemnation, idle talk, viewing bad images”, and quite another to courageously expose a specific sin in all its ugliness: throw mud at a colleague behind his back, reproach his friend for not lending me money watching a porn movie...

You can, of course, fall into the other extreme, when a person plunges into petty, painful self-digging. It is possible to get to the point where the confessor will even experience pleasure from sin, as if reliving it again, or he will begin to be proud: they say, what a deep person I am with a complex and rich inner life ... The main thing must be said about sin, its essence, and no, sorry, smear ...

It is also useful to recall that when we confess any sins, we thereby undertake the obligation not to commit them, or at least to fight against them. Just talking about sins in confession is a great irresponsibility. At the same time, some also begin to theologize: I have no humility, because there is no obedience, and there is no obedience, because there is no confessor, and good confessors cannot be found now, because “the last times” and “the elders of our time have not been given” ... Others they generally begin to confess the sins of their relatives, acquaintances ... but not their own. In this way, our crafty nature tries to justify itself before God even at confession and “shift” the blame onto someone else. Therefore, sin must really ... mourn at confession, expose without concealment all its abomination - denounce. If a person is ashamed at confession, then this is a good sign. It means that the grace of God has already touched the soul.

Sometimes a person repents (even with tears in his eyes) that he ate a non-fasting gingerbread on a fast day or tempted soup with sunflower oil ... At the same time, he does not notice at all that he has been living at enmity with his daughter-in-law or husband for many years, indifferently passes by someone else's misfortune ; completely disregarding his family or official duties ... Blind people who can’t see beyond their own noses, “straining a mosquito and swallowing a camel” ()! .. This applies precisely to those people who consider themselves churchgoers, go for more than one year (or even a decade ) to the temple of God and ... at the same time they live in some kind of world invented by themselves - there is no God there, because there is no main thing: love for people. How the Lord Jesus Christ denounced us in this moral blindness and grieved over the “leaven of the Pharisees and Sadducees”, with which we are all more or less affected ... We immediately see a girl who comes in in trousers, or a tipsy guy, and, like kites, we pounce on them: let's go Get out of our church!

“Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites, that you are like painted tombs, which look beautiful on the outside, but inside are full of the bones of the dead and all kinds of uncleanness; so you, outwardly, seem righteous to people, but inside you are full of hypocrisy and lawlessness ”().

So, one must confess concretely, succinctly, ruthlessly in relation to oneself (to one's "old man"), without concealing anything, without embellishing, without belittling sin. First you need to confess the grossest, most shameful, disgusting sins - resolutely dump these dirty, mossy stones from the house of the soul. Then already collect the rest of the pebbles, sweep, scrape the bottom of the barrel ...

You need to prepare for confession in advance, and not hastily, somehow, already standing in the temple. You can prepare for several days (this process in the church language is called fasting). Preparation for the Sacraments of Confession and Communion is not only a food diet (although this is also important), but also a deep examination of one's soul, and a prayerful invocation of God's help. For the latter, by the way, the so-called Rule for Communion is intended, which can be different depending on the level of the Christian's churching. I am convinced that forcing a person who is taking his first steps in the Church to read the whole big rule in Church Slavonic that he does not understand is “imposing burdens that are unbearable” (). The measure of fasting and prayer rules must be agreed with the priest.

Now consider third stage repentance is probably the most difficult. After the sin is recognized and confessed, the Christian must prove repentance by his life. It means a very simple thing: no more committing the confessed sin. And this is where the most difficult, the most painful begins... The person thought that, having confessed, having experienced the grace-filled comfort of confession, he had fulfilled everything, and now, finally, one could enjoy life in God. But it turns out that everything is just beginning! A fierce battle with sin begins. Or rather, it should have started. In fact, often a person gives in to this struggle and again falls into sin.

I would like to draw your attention to one strange (at first glance) regularity. Here is a man confessing some sin. For example, angry. And for some reason, immediately - either on this day, or in the near future - there is again a reason for irritation. The temptation is right there. Even sometimes in an even more severe form than it was before confession. For this reason, some Christians are even afraid to go to confession and take communion often—they are afraid of “increasing temptations.” But the fact of the matter is that the Lord, accepting our repentance, gives us the opportunity to prove the seriousness of our confession and to carry out this repentance in practice. The Lord offers a kind of "work on mistakes" so that this time a person does not succumb to sin, but does the right thing: in the gospel way. And most importantly, a person is already equipped to fight sin with the grace of God received in the Mystery of Confession. To the extent of our sincerity, seriousness, and depth shown in confession, the Lord gives us His grace-filled strength to fight sin. Don't miss this divine opportunity! There is no need to be afraid of new temptations, one must be ready for them in order to courageously meet them and ... not to sin. Only then will an end be put to our repentant epic and victory will be won over some particular sin. This moment is very important - it is necessary to focus on the struggle, first of all, with some particular sin. As a rule, we begin to eradicate the most obvious, gross sins in ourselves - such as fornication, drunkenness, drugs, smoking ... Only by plucking these gross sins from our souls, a person will begin to see other, more subtle (but no less dangerous) sins in himself : vanity, condemnation, envy, irritability ...

The monk of Optina said this about this: “You need to know what passion worries you the most, and you need to fight it especially. To do this, you need to check your conscience daily ... ". It is not only necessary to repent of sins at confession, but it is good if a Christian in the evening, before going to bed, for example, remembers the day he lived and repents before the Lord of his sinful thoughts, feelings, intentions or aspirations ... “Cleanse me from my secrets” (), - Psalmist David prayed.

So, it is necessary to focus on a specific sin that really interferes with life, hinders our entire spiritual life, and take up arms against this sin. Constantly confess it, fight it with all the means available to us; read the writings of the holy fathers about ways to deal with this sin, consult with a confessor. It is good if a Christian eventually finds a confessor for himself - this is a great help in spiritual life. We need to pray to the Lord that He would vouchsafe such a gift: a real confessor. It does not have to be an elder (and where can you find them, elders, in our time?). It is enough to find a sober-minded priest who is familiar with patristic tradition and has at least a minimal spiritual experience.

Confession must be regular (as well as communion of the Holy Mysteries of Christ). The frequency of confession and Communion is individual for each person. This issue is resolved with the confessor. However, in any case, a Christian must at least once a month go to confession and receive communion. This is important precisely because the soul is regularly clogged with all sorts of sinful rubbish. No one has any questions why it is necessary to regularly wash your face, brush your teeth, see a doctor ... In the same way, our soul needs careful care for it. Man is a whole being, consisting of soul and body. And if we take care of the body, then about the soul - alas! - we often completely forget ... It is precisely because of the above-mentioned integrity of a person that carelessness about the soul then affects bodily health, and indeed on the whole life of a person. You can (and should!) confess more often (without Communion), as needed. It hurts - we immediately run to the doctor. Therefore, we must remember that the Doctor is always waiting for us in the temple.

Yes, the inertia of sin is great. The habit of sin, which has been developed over the years, cannot help but drag a person to the bottom. Fear of this skill fetters our will and fills our souls with despondency: no, I cannot conquer sin... Thus, faith that the Lord can help is lost. A person goes to confession for months, then for years and repents of the same stereotyped sins. And… nothing, no positive changes.

And here it is very important to remember the words of the Lord that “The Kingdom of Heaven is taken by force, and those who use force take it away” (). To use force in the Christian life means to struggle with sin in oneself. If a Christian really struggles with himself, he will soon feel how, from confession to confession, the octopus of sin begins to weaken its tentacles and the soul begins to breathe more and more freely. Necessary - necessary, like air! - to feel this taste of victory. It is the cruel, uncompromising struggle against sin that strengthens our faith - “and this is the victory that conquered the world, our faith” ().

Hieromonk Cyprian (Safronov), a resident of the Danilov Monastery, answers questions.

– Father, many people are now complaining that they cannot properly confess, they are not succeeding.

– Yes, the vast majority of people do not know how to confess. Some go to church for ten years, but have not learned how to confess correctly. Why? The problem is not even that they cannot understand how to confess correctly, the problem is that they are not really interested in this, they do not read literature, although now many books and inexpensive brochures are being published, they still do not know how to behave correctly in the church, how an Orthodox person should behave in general. There is a code of conduct for an Orthodox person! Sometimes they even forget that they are Orthodox people. And as a result, they cannot correctly approach the sacrament of Confession. Hence the problems arise. Such a person comes to confession as a normal procedure preceding communion. But this is the sacrament, the great sacrament of the Church, only through the sacrament of Confession can a person correct himself, correct his life, learn to live correctly. No other way. The grace of God is given directly only through the sacraments. Each sacrament of the Church gives its grace: the sacrament of the Wedding gives grace to married life, the sacrament of ordination to the priestly career, and the sacrament of Confession is given to a person so that he is spiritually and physically healthy, so that he sooner or later learns to live correctly, that is, not sin. And if a person himself cannot stop sinning, cannot correct himself, then the Lord allows the disease so that he, at least through it, stops sinning. Illnesses are the grace of God, they are given to us due to our weakness and foolishness, the Lord humbles us with illnesses, and when we are healthy, we begin to treat the sins that we love to repeat when we are healthy, more than cool, we humble ourselves.

“Many, when they come to confession, hope that the priest himself will ask them about everything…

– A priest at confession should not necessarily ask the confessor for anything... A person must learn to confess his sins on his own, prepare a confession in advance by analyzing his behavior, identify the sin, come and tell the priest: I am a sinner. Often the confessor begins to tell how, say, he had a strong argument with someone, what he said to him, and what he answered, and how he reacted to it; Who is to blame - you can't figure it out. Then you have to ask the confessor what is your sin, yours personally, and remind him that he came to confess, and not complain about another.

– And if a person cannot correctly assess the situation himself and tells it to the priest so that the priest can help?

- A person should know that in any situation he must first of all blame himself. Why? Because, offended, he did not make concessions, did not stop the incident, although he could. The Orthodox must look for his guilt in any situation, because in any situation in life, part of the blame always lies with us. If there is no guilt at all on us, then we should feel calm, our conscience should be calm.

“But a man was slandered in vain, and he did not do what he is blamed for ...

Then it's not his problem.

"It's so embarrassing for him...

– But this is already a big sin, and you need to go to confession right away. The problem here is that you are offended, which means that there is some truth in what you were slandered about. If you have some kind of anxiety, if you start complaining, this is an indicator that there is also your fault. Our resentment tells us that something is wrong with us. This trouble first accumulates inside, little by little, and does not immediately come out, but then, having overwhelmed us, it will definitely come to light. And a person, if he does not confess properly, begins to look for his own ways to get out of resentment: he makes plans for personal revenge, goes to a psychologist, a sorcerer, or even thinks about how to hire a killer ...

It happens that a person, say, stepped on another's sore callus and did not notice. The owner of a sick callus begins to shout at him, they say, look where you are going, otherwise he will give it to the top of his head - it's a shame that his sick callus was not noticed. A person, knowing that there is no guilt on him, is at a loss - for what he received, but nevertheless he is not offended. What is the result? The victim, not only did he step on a sore spot, but he also sinned and now must repent at confession. That is, it turns out that the injured party has sinned more. And from the one who came, there is no demand from him, he got on the top of his head for nothing, he has nothing to repent of. The victim, if he suffered, would become a martyr, and he would have love for a person from the fact that he forgave him.

– Often people, due to illness or some other good reason, miss Sunday services in the temple, and it may be difficult to blame them for this…

- Previously, an Orthodox person dreamed of dying in a church, and after Communion, he considered death all the more happiness, therefore, in spite of any illness, he went to service in the church, fasted, took communion. He did not think about whether he was sick or healthy, whether he could go to the temple or not. I had to go to the temple - I went to the temple, I had to go to work - I went to work. Why? Because he believed in God, tried to live in His will. And in our time, a person has been treated for 40 years and cannot be cured, and for all 40 years he has been preoccupied with this only, buys and reads a lot of “healthy” literature, consults with many specialists, drinks a huge amount of medicines, but there is no sense. And he also cannot die in a divine way, although, perhaps, he wants to - the time has come. Sins are not allowed. How did they die before? The man worked and worked in the field, felt that he was tired, sat down to rest, sighed, crossed himself and gave his soul to God. And now they are suffering, but they don’t allow sins ... They don’t confess, as they should, they don’t take communion for six months, but when some misfortune happens to them, they immediately run to church for confession. They come, confess, and disappear again for half a year... So they turn around because of their weakness - now one misfortune, then another, then a third, and it turns out - they are not turned to God, and they do not belong to the world.

- What to do?

- Confess in time, take communion, do not break fasts - strictly fulfill your duties. And severity should be determined by the priest, as he determines each person separately.