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Probably, every person has at least one relative or friend who has already been buried. People always pay maximum attention to their loved ones. Even after the death of a person, there is a desire to visit his tomb and take care of his peace. But many do not know how to visit a cemetery correctly. There are days when it is possible and even necessary to go to the cemetery. And, conversely, when it is better not to visit the dead.
When can you go to the cemetery:
When you can't go to the cemetery:
Some sources report that it would be wrong to go to the tomb on the birthday of the deceased. You can just remember him with a kind word. But there is another opinion that such memorable dates as the birthday or the day of the Angel also serve as an occasion to commemorate the deceased. These days, you can also invite a priest to the grave. There are also some superstitions and rules of conduct on the churchyard.
If you're planning a trip to the cemetery, don't wear brightly colored clothing. Black or white are most suitable. You can also pick up muted tones from your wardrobe. Legs must be covered: wear pants or a long skirt. Shoes should also be closed. It is advisable to cover the head with a headdress or throw on a scarf.
When they go to the cemetery, they behave calmly, without unnecessary emotions. Avoid laughing or crying out loud. Do not swear.
Don't spit or litter. And if you feel like it out of necessity, find a suitable place for this outside the cemetery.
Upon arrival at the grave, a positive action will be to light a candle, to remember the deceased.
Do not eat or drink near the tombstone. Have a memorial dinner at home.
Do not step on graves or jump over them.
There is no need to touch other people's burial places, to put things in order there, if you were not asked by the relatives of the person buried there.
In the event that you dropped something on the dead ground, it is better not to pick it up anymore. If the dropped object is very important to you, picking it up, put something in return (sweets, cookies, flowers).
Leaving the cemetery, do not turn around, and, moreover, do not return.
When you come home, wash your hands thoroughly (and it is better to do this even at the cemetery), be sure to wash off the cemetery soil from your shoes, wash the tool that was used to clean up at the grave.
When to visit the cemetery, each person decides for himself. Of course, going to such places almost every day is not recommended. But you don't need to forget about your loved ones either. Do what your heart tells you. In a situation where you live far from the grave of your relatives or simply do not have the opportunity to visit them, but there is a desire to pay attention and remember, go to church and light a candle for peace. You need to put this candle in the middle part of the temple on the left side.
You need to know that such candles are not put on the days of Holy Week and the days of Bright Week. Also in the church there is an opportunity to order a panikhida (prayer for the dead) or a litiya (increased prayer) from the priest. You can also pray yourself: read the Psalter or the rite of the litia performed by a layman.
Under any circumstances, remember your deceased loved ones, and when you come to their graves, behave appropriately, because a cemetery is a sacred land, a resting place for the deceased.
In any European culture, respect for the memory of loved ones is of great importance. Visiting cemeteries is a must for their relatives, and not only to put things in order at the grave, but also not to forget about a loved one, cope with his loss and remember all the good things that connected you with him.
In Russian culture, there is an unspoken set of rules and recommendations on how and when to visit cemeteries. Our today's material will tell you whether you can often come to the grave of a friend or relative, how to honor his memory, what holidays are suitable for a mournful visit, and also what beliefs exist associated with visiting the graves of loved ones.
You must not come to visit the deceased - this will demonstrate your indifference. In addition, from time to time it is necessary to put the grave in order - to see if the earth is subsiding, to plant flowers and plants for an attractive appearance, to change faded wreaths and ribbons, to clean and restore the monument (if it is made of wood or metal).
But it is also not recommended to come to the cemetery often - folk beliefs are associated with this. Abuse of visiting the grave can negatively affect life and even bring illness. According to popular belief, it is not recommended for pregnant women to visit cemeteries - this can harm the baby and the expectant mother.
It is better to visit the cemetery once a season or on separate days. Non-religious people come to the graves of loved ones on Easter, the anniversary of death or May 9, and adherents of the Christian religion - on some church holidays and commemoration days.
The Orthodox religion has determined the days on which it is better to pay a visit to the cemetery:
There is controversy over Easter - is it worth visiting the graves of loved ones on this day. Many religious people are against this practice, since the meaning of the holiday is joy, which does not correlate with sorrow and pain of loss. Therefore, it is recommended to postpone cemetery worries until Radonitsa - it falls on Tuesday 2 weeks after Easter.
Prepare the necessary set of tools in advance to put the grave in order. In the spring, they remove non-rotten leaves, garbage and weeds, in the fall they shelter the plants from the cold. The monument needs to be renewed if it has been damaged mechanically or by exposure to moisture. They hang a new wreath or bring a bouquet of fresh flowers. You can plant fresh flowers - this is more aesthetically pleasing and looks like a touching gift from loved ones to the deceased.
A small memorial meal can be arranged at the table. To take alcohol with you or not is a matter of personal preference; in national culture, a shot of vodka for peace is a generally accepted tradition, but not everyone will share it. Therefore, you can get by with tea, sweets and a light snack.
Is it really forbidden to go to the cemetery on Wednesdays? What days is it possible? How often can and should it be done? Does everyone know the answers to these questions? Of course not. Only people who are deeply religious know, who often go to church and fulfill all church instructions.
The main mass sometimes listens to the older generation, but most often they act according to the rule "where everyone is, there I go too." Well, there is also a category of people who do not believe in anyone and in anything. Such, as a rule, act at their own discretion.
Radonitsa or Radunitsa is a holiday of remembrance of the dead, in common parlance it is called parental day. Celebrated on the ninth day after Easter. On this day, it is customary to rejoice for those who have left this vain world, got rid of the physical shell, freed from suffering and hard life.
For everyone, it has become a habit when, on the day of the Holy Trinity, a huge number of people rush to the cemetery to visit their relatives and friends who are resting there. And few people know that the church does not advise visiting the cemetery on this day, you can go to the grave of your family the day before, but not on the day of Holy Trinity. The same applies to the holiday of Easter, because it is a holiday of the living. Better to just go to church these days.
Both the Bible and the church either advise or do not advise visiting the cemetery on any days, but they do not put direct prohibitions, especially that it is not mentioned anywhere that one should not go to the cemetery on Wednesdays.
No one can prohibit visiting the graves of their loved ones, if a person has such a desire or need. Visiting the cemetery often helps people cope with loss, put their thoughts in order and calm down.
Therefore, when it is better to visit the grave of a loved one, everyone chooses for himself. And it doesn't matter at all what day it is, Monday, Wednesday or any other day of the week.
Is it really forbidden to go to the cemetery on Wednesdays? What days is it possible? How often can and should it be done? Does everyone know the answers to these questions? Of course not. Only people who are deeply religious know, who often go to church and fulfill all church instructions.
The main mass sometimes listens to the older generation, but most often they act according to the rule "where everyone is, there I go too." Well, there is also a category of people who do not believe in anyone and in anything. Such, as a rule, act at their own discretion.
Radonitsa or Radunitsa is a holiday of remembrance of the dead, in common parlance it is called parental day. Celebrated on the ninth day after Easter. On this day, it is customary to rejoice for those who have left this vain world, got rid of the physical shell, freed from suffering and hard life.
For everyone, it has become a habit when, on the day of the Holy Trinity, a huge number of people rush to the cemetery to visit their relatives and friends who are resting there. And few people know that the church does not advise visiting the cemetery on this day, you can go to the grave of your family the day before, but not on the day of Holy Trinity. The same applies to the holiday of Easter, because it is a holiday of the living. Better to just go to church these days.
Both the Bible and the church either advise or do not advise visiting the cemetery on any days, but they do not put direct prohibitions, especially that it is not mentioned anywhere that one should not go to the cemetery on Wednesdays.
No one can prohibit visiting the graves of their loved ones, if a person has such a desire or need. Visiting the cemetery often helps people cope with loss, put their thoughts in order and calm down.
Therefore, when it is better to visit the grave of a loved one, everyone chooses for himself. And it doesn't matter at all what day it is, Monday, Wednesday or any other day of the week.
Please add your opinion:
pocemu.ru
There are many traditions and signs associated with the commemoration of the departed, but not everyone knows why one cannot go to the cemetery on Wednesday. Let's try to understand this issue together.
Cemetery and signs | Do they go to the cemetery on Wednesday? | What days should the dead be commemorated? | When should you not go to the cemetery?
READ MORE Is it possible to work on Parent's Saturday
So you found out why you can't go to the cemetery on Wednesday and realized that this is just an outdated omen that has no foundation.
nasheptala.org
For most people, the cemetery evokes unpleasant and frightening feelings, and similar fears were present among the people in ancient times. All this determines the presence of various superstitions, for example, many are interested in whether they go to the cemetery on Wednesdays, and when is it best to do it. Signs are not an order and no one has the right to make them follow, so everyone has a choice whether to follow them or not.
Most of the signs appeared due to the observation of people, and some are more only a reflection of fantasies. In addition, in ancient times, signs were only a way of managing people, therefore, it is possible that the prohibition concerning the fact that one should not go to the cemetery on Wednesday was also invented due to the prevailing circumstances.
To find the answer to the main question, you need to look in the Bible to find out the opinion of the clergy. The church defines important days when visiting the graves of loved ones is mandatory. First of all, this concerns the days of remembrance: the 3rd, 9th and 40th days after death. It is recommended to go to the cemetery on the day of death of a person, Radonitsa and on Saturdays, because these days are considered funeral days. 8 days before the onset of Great Postavy, Orthodox Christians also celebrate meat Saturday. Many also visit the graves of deceased people on the day of Holy Trinity, but the church does not recommend doing this, so if there is a desire to visit the departed, then it is better to do this on the eve of the holiday on the day of Trinity parental Saturday.
Now it is necessary to figure out whether it is possible to go to the cemetery on Wednesday, and in general whether the day of the week is important for visiting deceased relatives and friends. In fact, both the Bible and the church can only advise you to visit the cemetery on some days, but there are no direct prohibitions, all the more so as to why you cannot go to the cemetery on Wednesday. The clergy say that no one can forbid visiting the grave of a loved one, especially if there is a strong desire. For many people, coming to the cemetery and talking with the deceased helps to come to terms with loss, sort out their thoughts and calm down. Summing up, we can say whether or not to go to the cemetery on Wednesday should be decided by the person himself, not paying attention to existing prejudices.
Now let's talk about how to properly visit the graves of relatives and friends who have passed away. The Church, speaking about the deceased, prefers to use the word "departed", which implies the coming of the time when God will revive the believers and the grave will be the place where a person will be resurrected. It was from here that the tradition and rule began to look after the burial place and decorate it with fresh and artificial flowers. When visiting the grave of a loved one, it is recommended to light a candle and perform a litiya, that is, to be silent near the tombstone for a while, and this should be done meaningfully. It is believed that at such a moment, kind thoughts will be more important than any words. You can also read a prayer or akathist for repose, which will be much better than sobbing. In addition, psychics generally say that it is impossible to cry for dead people, since souls in the next world drown in them. It is also worth mentioning a common tradition among people - to set the table and drink near the grave, but such actions will only be an insult to the memory of the deceased. One of the common traditions is to leave food on the grave, but it is pagan and the best solution would be to give food to those in need. The church recommends that you must visit the temple in order to submit a note with the name of the deceased. Thus, not only you, but also the church will pray for the soul of a loved one.
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Some sources report that it would be wrong to go to the tomb on the birthday of the deceased. You can just remember him with a kind word, in the bosom of the family and loved ones of the deceased.
Upon arrival at the grave, a positive action will be to light a candle, to remember the deceased.